Worst Car
I just took an instant dislike to these 2 clowns and their car, I don’t know why. I didn’t like their hair, I didn’t like their Kitestock 07 -See You There! stickers, their Organics sticker, the P plate and most especially their pirate sticker. No real reason. Unfortunately that poorly tied load ahead didn’t topple onto them.
And I didn’t like this bastard either.
Worst Architecture
I don’t know if there is more than one Serbian Orthodox retirement home in Perth, but if there’s not, then this is the worst. The “Mother In Law Tongues” licking at the bottom, (if I can put it that way) of the building add a nice sinister touch. What got this crappy but reasonably unremarkable building into The Worst of Perth, apart from the Cocos was that it was opened by Terry Burke, brother of notorious ex Premier and current shadowy figure Brian Burke. Having to settle for Terry would have been a big disappointment. Have had eight requests to cover Brian Burke as worst person. He’s on the list babies.
Worst Brothel (architecture that is). Minor adult satire warning.
Since a post on The Worst Brothel Conversion, search engines have been directing a torrent of search results for “Perth Brothel, Brothels in Perth…etc, etc, etc” to Worst of Perth. So much so that Worst of Perth is well inside the top ten google results for Perth brothels – well ahead of many legitimate knock shop links! Fortunately for you pathetic devils, Worst of Perth is in a position to help, whilst also providing a standard irony service to it’s usual punters. Here is an incredibly ugly brothel on Beauford Street Inglewood. Could it look more depressing? The light isn’t even red! If you can’t find this one, you are never going to get any.
Worst of Perth wants to make it clear that it has never had to pay for it.
Lovely T shirt contribution from Hokusan. You may need to read comments below. Minor adult satire warning..
Guest Post from My Ning. It’s a little hard to tell whether My Ning is nominating this piece for worst person, worst newspaper, worst journalist or worst private school, but what the hey, let’s tick all of them. The fact that he has included a shot of the billionaire’s bonce showing it at it’s worst is good enough for me. My Ning says…
During the past few months, The West Australian has been reminding us of what a fantastic success Andrew “Twiggy” Forrest was when he went to the private WA boys private school Hale back in the late 1970s. Forrest, of course, is the Cottesloe-based billionaire and great grand nephew of pioneering WA premier Sir John Forrest, who has made a fortune from spruiking minerals stocks.
Worst Church, Worst Architecture
It’s not just knitting patterns or low grade graphics that pixelate on the diagonal, but also apparently churches. This Uniting Church in Railway Parade Mt Lawley didn’t realise that it had a major resolution problem until it was too late. Tell me, is this really a cross piercing the throat of a crocodile? I’m sure if a crocodile attacked, you’d be grateful of any help you could get, but aren’t there more prosaic needs that have priority to be set in bricks and mortar? I’m sure many good works are performed, but, brickie, heal thyself: Come on! The congregation will be laughing hard if I’m taken by a croc this week, and I’d be forced to say, “You got me a beauty guys.”
Mt Lawley Uniting Church, 165 Railway Parade, Mt Lawley WA 6050
Worst House. Guest Post by Cimbali
I came across this place when I had to detour around a truck unloading a piano on my way to work. It is on King George Street in Victoria Park. I can’t help but think it would be improved with the judicious placement of some cocos palms. CimbaliLooks like where a some despotic foreign potentate might bury one of his minor concubines. As soon as you said “house in Victoria Park” I knew the place you meant. I’ve been past it hundreds of times and have never seen anyone going in or even a flutter of the blinds. I’m convinced there’s a marble sarcophagus inside -ed.
Was it something I said? Worst Wall Ramming
Only 2 weeks ago, The Worst of Perth covered The Great Wall of Maylands. Today in breaking news, the wall has been rammed and is partly smashed! The Worst of Perth editor had a bit of explaining to do to police, with the dent in the front of the Camry and all, but the the wheelbase did not match. Please guys, it’s not worth risking your life to rid Perth of its design crimes. I just hope Paul Murray, Perth’s worst journalist takes care when walking his dog in light of this development.
This has illustrated sooner than expected one of the more serious aspects of The Worst of Perth, that is for preserving a record of the trivial and the ugly that will otherwise be lost. A time capsule of small things. Goodbye great wall.
I would love to have seen the car!
Worst Architecture?
Was a time when the crab infested burg of Mandurah would have been classified as “country”. However Perth and it’s high tech freeway has swallowed (although only partially digested) crustacean town. Here is a picture of a burnt miniature village. It is hard to tell if this perversity, which hordes of holiday makers have averted their gaze from, is more or less sinister after having been torched. Police are looking for a leprechaun who was seen arson around the place.
Hansel and Gretel’s house in the foreground.
Worst Graphic Design. Guest Post by Robotnik
Robo. Have had a request to cover the outside, or at least the silent bells of La Carillion. Like your attack on the innards. This is a truly appalling piece of design, backed up with equally poor implementation- ed. Robotnik says…
Pancakes at Carillon
Superb post in word and pic Robotnik. Also like the button that lights up a $ sign which opens a new window for specials – A new window that delivers you a blank orange rectangle. I believe the “tart” used to say “Lovely”. This rivals many of the world’s worst websites. Straight to worst of the worst.
Worst Sculpture
This poor fellow looks like he’s got a Cocos Palm caught in his ring. Close to Belmont Raceway, but still – why? The pained look? The effeminate hand on the hip? For some reason he’s standing on a large brick pillar, and is still a shortarse.
 | Anonymous on Alexander The Great’s… |
| Anonymous on Sandringham |
| Anonymous on V Capri |
| Anonymous on The Beachist |
| Anonymous on Alexander The Great’s… |
| Anonymous on A House is not a home… |
 | AHC McDonald on Cockington Dog |
| Anonymous on Cockington Dog |
| Anonymous on The Bunbury of The North |
| Anonymous on Old Mill Rising |
| AHC McDonald on Old Mill Rising |
| Anonymous on Old Mill Rising |
| AHC McDonald on Rooting on The Wrackline |
| Anonymous on Rooting on The Wrackline |
| AHC McDonald on Old Mill Rising |
The Asia Beat
The Worst of Perth 