Well quite

Posted on March 5, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Well I suppose, yeah, “fuck Subiaco”, but exactly what is there to be passionate about in Subiaco enough to warrant this graffiti? Subiaco is a nothingness, a negative space, where every effort and every dollar has gone into making it a boring lifeless hole. Fuck Mandurah yes, where gay crabs,  Rolly Tasker’s hideous pile, highway bypasses and burnt miniature villages give you some pricks to kick against. But Subiaco? Subi? It’s like complaining about the colour beige. Sure, but why? And are any of these acts actually appearing in Subiaco? I doubt it. The posters apear to have been pasted onto the derelict markets site, now slated for some terrible high rise. OK, I’ll get on board. Fuck Subiaco. By Natalia fan#1. 

Posted in worst graffiti | Tagged , , | 15 Comments

Outrage Sunday 44 praise the worst

Posted on March 4, 2012 by rottobloggo

Ha ha! TLA boasted he will feature many pics of abandoned chairs in odd places: scooped, sucker!

How sweet it is to scoop the Flangemaster. I was going to make a  snide remark about the decline of alfresco worship in Teh Pert, but Krazy Kym filled me in on the real deal. A stretch Hummer with flashing blue LEDs disgorged a bride and groom, and their guests with seating, at St Matthew’s in Guildford. The chairs must be biodegradable.

This may also have been left behind.”Then the Lord sayeth unto Premier Barnett, ‘Check it out! I will rain bread and LNG from heaven for you; and your hi-vis workers shall go out and gather a certain rate every day, that I may prove them, whether they will drive their utes into my pool, or no’. And it was thus.” Exodus 16.4, if I remember correctly.

Speaking of Mr Barnett: these are great days to be a Cottesloe reporter. Sculpture by the Sea, giant sunflowers, and the Premier sounding off about the beachfront. News outlets running outdated pics (the Cottesloe Beach Hotel was painted white some time ago) are flies in the glorious 6011 ointment.

Do you think this gentleman goes to St Matthew’s or Cott? The police say he could help with enquiries into an aggravated armed robbery in Port Kennedy last month.

It’s too frightening out there, so I am staying indoors on this Sunday (the day of Teh Bready Lord) and curling up with a good book, thanks to literary advice in my local paper, The Echo.

Posted in Uncatetorisable worsts, worst church, worst food, worst furniture, worst newspaper | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

Weekend Worstoff 191

Posted on March 3, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Seen by Budda lala land. Yes Zach, don’t be put off by the unicorns you old Pedo.
Another beautiful photo of the essence of Perthness from Pete F, Port Coogee.
And another Supa (N) IGA that has succumbed to Perth disease. The 25 specialty shps that turned out to be 5. By Cazza. Still haven’t got a car in loungeroom shot though. I have been sent many shots of abandoned chairs in odd places that I will have to do a feature of sometime. Worst well.

Posted in weekend worstoff | 7 Comments

One way ticket to Polutaville

Posted on March 2, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Big Poluta, Morley Drive.

Posted in worst car | Tagged , , | 13 Comments

Nancanbong and Wearenotbonds

Posted on March 1, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Nancanbong. Perhaps also a town in central Vietnam, but more particularly relevant to Perth, this is where Colin Barnett’s anti bong laws have led us. To the shameful need of young smokers to raid nan’s personalised coke can. Or perhaps more frighteningly likely, to raid nan’s already created can bong!  By Budda lala land.

On the subject of faux personal marketing, Bonds is doing one at the moment. If you are the first to “claim” your birthdate then you get a free shirt with I AM 12.07.1969 etc. When I say they are doing it, they are more accurately fucking it up, with massive website crashes, and thousands of cranky tightarses who either can’t load their pics, or have been beaten to their date by some other quick fingered marketing wanker’s child. They have been bolstering the campaign with a lot of mostly dubious celebrities (Michael Caton wot fuck?). Not to worry, for a price you can reclaim your date and tell the squatter where to go. Anyone who wants to tell 3 year old Ashlee to fuck off, and inform her who is the real 18.07.08, then they can email me and I will create it and their shirt will be avalable for purchase for one day on my Redbubble channel. Some samples. And I think Redbubble uses Fruit of the loom tees, so another one in the eye for Bonds.

Posted in worst advertising | Tagged , , , , | 8 Comments

Believe it

Posted on February 29, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Bert took a shot of one of the lamest crazes going around at the moment, thinking it was just the note of a crackpot deposited in Perth’s ciggie based detritus. No. Just losers, who in past times (and let’s be honest, even present times) might have had a go at seeing if “the force” was real. Harbourtown. Of course Bert could be scamming and jamming believeinsherlock. Whatever.#BelieveinSherlock

Posted in Uncategorisable Worsts | 24 Comments

Shadism

Posted on February 28, 2012 by AHC McDonald

You would expect a certain climate change skepticism in Perth’s Western suburbs, particularly in Nedlands, where the residents have the reputation of being a little over conservative. But this home-owner is ready for the hole in the ozone layer to poop down whatever it dares. His gate will see no sun faded grey paint. Such a tightly tailored example of shade cloth I have never seen. And I’m not sure how those shaded points are going to deter eastern suburb ne’er do wells from vaulting the battlements. By Nick S.

Posted in worst garden | Tagged , , | 69 Comments

Demon

Posted on February 27, 2012 by AHC McDonald

What has Perth civilisation come to? A council worker can’t lay down some wet concrete without some plonker hopped up on (I’m guessing) Howling Wolves, Bare Rooted or mojito juice carving the Chinese symbol for ghost or demon into the footpath? And then fucking instagramming it? And right outside my own house!  Embleton is the worse for this type of behaviour. This (I’m guessing) young punk, deserves all they get. I SAID GOOD DAY!!!!

Posted in worst graffiti | Tagged , | 20 Comments

Outrage Sunday 43 pancakes

Posted on February 26, 2012 by rottobloggo

Tasteful colour, vibrant font – the only fly in the batter with this Guildford Road sign is few will see it as they concentrate on coping with the James Street bridge.

This gourmet feast was suddenly abandoned in Guildford. Por quoi? Diners were terrified by Daleks emerging from the nearby rose bushes.

While in Claremont someone invented a new cocktail in the Gugeri Street carpark. My sources tell me it’s already known as Outrage Spume at the little-known and hard to pronounce but wildly popular small bar in Claremont Quarter called Le Ultieme Hallucinatie.

And finally: if you need a laugh (and, frankly, who doesn’t in these troubled Kevinating times?) read JustLuxe’s take on WA. JustLuxe is an Affluent Lifestyle Guide. Sample words: “The host of the 1987 World Cup, Fremantle is as quaint as Perth is modern. The Roadhouse, Western Australia’s oldest building (dating back from the 1830’s) is located here.” And: “The Nambung National Park has many things to see including the Pinnacles. These natural limestone outcroppings challenge Aires’s Rock for the reputation as Australia’s eeriest spot.” Not forgetting: “Luxury is, after all, about access to fine and rare things and Western Australia’s Gondwanaland has both in abundance.” No mention of the pancakes – an outrage.

Posted in Uncatetorisable worsts, worst drink, worst food, worst sign | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 21 Comments

Weekend Worstoff 190

Posted on February 25, 2012 by AHC McDonald

Jaidyn Jaxxon describes the vibe as “postmodern” when he went to the Salvos to find some books to mutilate. Mens of course has Grisham and ladies a Danielle Steele fest, but no Justin Langer? And which side would he be on anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Paul R brings a similar sneeriness to KMart’s homemaker clock. Dude, you are in KMart. What did you expect, a clock made of Splayds or fondue forks?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And Tim D also noticed a postmodern vibe in this Joondalup bin. It’s all too much for me. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Worst well.

 

 

Posted in weekend worstoff | 31 Comments