The Nurry Diaries

Posted on November 30, 2008 by AHC McDonald

nuz3

Recent discovery. Jottings of a leaver who chose Allen Park instead of Rotto. (And Allen Park would be better than Dunsborough, which was a toilet BEFORE the toolies arrived). Person X.

Decided to forget Rotto and Dunsborough and party at Allen Park.

7:30am. Set up tent Allen Park.

7:35. Look for drunken sluts. None spied. Not even MLC girls, who frankly could make the 20 minute journey in Dad’s RRover.

8am. Still no sluts. Read Paul Murray’s column from discarded West. Who the fuck is Idi Amin? Possibly connected to Kevin Rudd. Kept copy of column in pocket so I can ask the cunt if I see him.

8:30 am. Slut shortage really starting to bite.

8:32 am. Lumbering slob appears with dog, smelling of old farts, stale chardonnay and BO. Dog’s hygiene even worse. Consider fucking dog and slob. Put off by smell. Ask for cash to buy piss. Get lecture on multanovas.

9am some sluts from St Hildas finally turned up, but I had been put off by Murray and his dog. Still fucked ’em, but you know, was still put off.

TBC.

Posted in worst journalist | Tagged , | 221 Comments

Weekend Worstoff 33

Posted on November 29, 2008 by AHC McDonald

Another weekend worstoff lite, as i’m still on international duties, but Snuff sees my dawgs yesterday, and raises me some Tokyo dumb chums. You can get away with this in Japan. It’s that type of place. You could leave your wallet on a bench and no-one would take it. I left my wife in a Tokyo park for 3 nights once, and no-one touched her. Nyuk nyuk. These dogs wouldn’t last a day in Perth.

tokyopets

And Dockerdave really doesn’t like the use of insured on this plaque.

insure

insure

And Rolly really liked this trailer full of junk in Scarborough. I like it too. It’s bad and yet it feels like Perth from overseas. Soothing.

freetippingcu2freetipping1

Be back soon. Worst well.

Posted in weekend worstoff | Tagged | 21 Comments

Dawgs

Posted on November 28, 2008 by AHC McDonald

I’m wondering whether they should just get a dog. Highgate.

dogscudogs

Posted in worst art, worst sculpture | Tagged , | 18 Comments

Santa Head Shot, Worst On Tour New Zealand

Posted on November 27, 2008 by AHC McDonald

Is it wise to have a Santa head stuffed and mounted next to other exterminated wildlife? Think of the children! This is in Timaru, a sort of Bunbury of the South Island.

I was after a wild pig...

I was after a wild pig...

But on the other hand, Timaru seems to have an excellent attitude to public art, ie put a bag over it. If Perth could only bag up more of our public artworks, the city would be in much finer shape. There is something quite touching about the face of peace having a bag over it. In any case, kudos Timaru, you handle your public art a lot better than we do.

peaceface

peacefaceplaque

Posted in *Worst of New Zealand, worst advertising, worst art, worst public art, worst sculpture | Tagged , , , | 21 Comments

Bollocks – In Aborigine, Worst on Tour New Zealand

Posted on November 26, 2008 by AHC McDonald

This faux-doo seen in Fairlie South Island. Another obscenity where words may fail. I spluttered as I saw it. It also appears to be made of bamboo or something. Bollocks, or Bowlux in aborigine. Can’t Mr Eggington come over and sort this out.didjeridoo

didjeridoocu1

Posted in *Worst of New Zealand, worst sign, worst spelling | Tagged , , , | 7 Comments

Brewers’ Droop

Posted on November 26, 2008 by AHC McDonald

I was hoping the Cottesloe knob, icon of generations of concrete fanciers would fall over while I was there, but it keeps hanging on. It’s only layers of paint celebrating loca footy wins that keeps it going. There must be some internet cream that would help.

cottdroop

Posted in worst beach | Tagged | 15 Comments

Worst on Tour New Zealand – Pure Merino

Posted on November 25, 2008 by AHC McDonald

merino1I usually try to stay away from Kiwi sheep rooting jokes, but sometimes they just make it impossible to avoid. This obviously is the fantasy. The reality likely to be a bit more gumboot based. You’d actually think they like the attention that accusations of sheep rooting brings. I say worst for making me descend to this type of joke. Shame Icebreaker, shame. Icebreaker make some good shirts though. You may also want to check out their ewetunes on the site.

merinocu

Posted in *Worst of New Zealand, worst advertising, worst graphic design, worst sign | Tagged , , , | 23 Comments

Funkarama

Posted on November 25, 2008 by AHC McDonald

There seems to be some disconnect between pictures and words here, or has the meaning of funkarama changed since I was a boy? Highgate.

funkarama1funkarama2

And I didn’t know where to put this, so, I put it here. it looked like a worst to me.

settlers

Posted in worst advertising, worst music, worst sign | Tagged , , | 11 Comments

Worst on Tour New Zealand – Cat Massage

Posted on November 24, 2008 by AHC McDonald

Moments after stating there wasn’t much worst in Hanmer Springs New Zealand, I walked out to a classic piece of ill considered graphic design. Hideous. I also bought the worst pizza I’ve ever eaten (or not eaten). Just because your country is a major dairy producer, it doesn’t mean you should put a year’s cheese output on one pizza. Opening for good pizza maker Hanmer Springs South Island New Zealand.

Not worst at Hanmer were the hot pools. At 70 plus degrees in the sauna, I saw I began to see visions of my ancestors hunting bison. (Although why they were hunting bison in Stratford on Avon, I’m not sure). Can I also add not worst New Zealand apples. Western Australian apple farmers are always opposing NZ imports on the grounds of disease etc. The real reason is that if we had imports, we’d see just how crap our apples are in WA. If you get a crisp AND sweet apple in Perth, it’s time to write to the papers. Here’ it’s the norm. Bring on Kiwi apple imports.

But back to worst. Here some. Some goood bad.

Mounted? No holding hands will do.

Mounted? No holding hands will do.

cat2sm

Posted in *Worst of New Zealand, *Worst of The World, worst advertising, worst graphic design | Tagged | 5 Comments

Pluck The Herald Angels Sing

Posted on November 24, 2008 by AHC McDonald

Is this an angel with its wings pulled off? Or did it have 2 sets of wings, one surplus to requirement? Since I won’t be in town enough, can someone please get some more bad xmas decorations shots. particularly led xmas trees. Note the missing Cinema City too.

pluck it

pluck it

Posted in worst advertising, worst of christmas | Tagged , | 8 Comments