The Best of The Worst of Perth Twitter

Posted on January 24, 2010 by AHC McDonald

Here’s the Best of the TWOP twitter newsfeed  lately. Current news alerts are in the sidebar, or subscribe to them all with The Worst of Perth rss news feed so you don’t miss any gold.

Edith Cowan lowers nursing intake scores. Experts claim ECU Nursing graduates won’t be able to find your arse with both hands…

Jack Van Tongeren to be new face of Skyshow as Lotterywest withdraw sponsorship. “It’s a great fit for us.” Van Tongeren claimed…

ShamWow foils street urination. A pensioner who threw a ShamWow onto the genitals of a teenager urinating on his fence, would do it again…

Overheated public turn on sharks. 2 sharks who closed Perth beaches got more than they bargained for as swimmers “tore them new gill slits”…

Buried Hangi “slow cooks forever”. Council workers in Timaru inadvertantly laid a concrete path over a buried hangi. Returning from pub,…

“Brozebo” refused planning permission. Part of the Men’s Sheds project, the Brozebo where men could stand in the shade and talk about chicks…

Malaysia -We invented the Singapore Sling. Originally made from Palm Oil & “blood of a Chinese Communist” the Malacca Sling was stolen by…

Hammond asks court to declare tree “hostile witness” as Patti Chong set to represent “Chainsaw Council” and Geoffrey Robertson flies in…

Beach residents fall for wind scam. City beach residents who paid for the Freo Doctor to arrive early at their houses have lost their money…

Posted in Best of banned by The West | Tagged , , | 19 Comments

Weekend Worstoff 92

Posted on January 23, 2010 by AHC McDonald

A poignant worst from Vic Demised seen at St John o’ God Murdoch. And whoops I’ve lost who sent me this. Bento? No was Stu. Thanks.And a Melbourne worst from CB One. He collects ceramic cafes.And Dave T thinks this is a welcome alternative to bogan flag cars. Worst well.

Posted in weekend worstoff, worst car, worst graffiti, worst sign | Tagged , , | 88 Comments

Gonging the Shagger’s back

Posted on January 22, 2010 by AHC McDonald

Are the rumours true that oft worsted Dennis Lillee is to be honoured on Australia day for being a curmudgeonly old bastard and bafflingly uncommunicative WACA president? A long, long time ago I wrote a few articles for Timezone Magazine and wanted to interview Dennis about the Dennis Lillee pinball machine “Howzat!” I tried to contact him and came home one day to find a message on the machine berating me for not being there when he called. Wot fuck? He apparently wanted me to sit at home next to the phone in case he ever called me. 

Lillee’s Lair

Firm but manky.

Posted in Uncategorisable Worsts | Tagged | 34 Comments

Flag craze flags

Posted on January 22, 2010 by AHC McDonald

Been a lot of bogan flag talk lately, but the streets seem to have been reasonably clear of them. Has the bubble, like that of car red noses also burst? WAtching got a shot of what may be the last bastion of bogan vexilloligy in Clarkson. Michael also got a shot of some rare giant p plate flat boganry. But on the whole the moronic car flag thing seems a little less in evidence this year.

Posted in worst car | Tagged , | 73 Comments

Ten years on…

Posted on January 21, 2010 by AHC McDonald

Surprisingly I have had requests to show pics of my Parker pen I received for 10 years service at Curtin. Also shown is my 1970’s Sheaffer Triumph fountain, which is I think classier,  but the Parker is heavy enough to put down a riot which is nice. Sort of like a Penang Lawyer. In other news, Tony of Aftergrog Blog sent me the news that Tim Winton will be on a postage stamp. I couldn’t find a picture, but, from HeraldSun Winton said he was delighted writers were selected for the Australian Legends stamp series. “It’s great to think that Australians would honour writers in the same way that it has honoured sports stars,” he said.

Posted in Uncategorisable Worsts | Tagged , | 35 Comments

Ooh Sauce

Posted on January 21, 2010 by AHC McDonald

A lovely classic worst from Mr Shark Craft which combines bad postcode 6165 with graffiti written in tomato AND barbeque sauce. Be rad. Be very rad. Click for larger.

Posted in worst graffiti | Tagged | 24 Comments

They hunt for worsts…

Posted on January 20, 2010 by AHC McDonald

But is he better than the parent who gave to society a neurotic child who became a graphic designer? Is he better than the manufacturer who set up belated foundations with the money he made by organising B&S Balls for suicidal nationalists? Is he better than the distiller who gave bastardized cane juice to stultify further the brains of those who, sober, were incapable of a progressive thought? …Is he worse, then, than the publisher who encoraged Tim Winton? Is he better than Ben Elton as he tries to put him down at every opportunity? No, at every turn No.

And yet he hunts.

Posted in Uncategorisable Worsts, worst people | Tagged | 240 Comments

Wolves Sucked Dry

Posted on January 20, 2010 by AHC McDonald

CB One sends a couple more pertinent shots from the Southbound Festival. I’ll bet they were howling after sucking these dry. I didn’t know Old Howlin’ came in this packaging. Are they wine shooters? You don’t even have to remove the bags from the box these days. How lazy is this society of ours?

Posted in Uncategorisable Worsts | Tagged , , | 27 Comments

Bundyman – He is risen

Posted on January 20, 2010 by AHC McDonald

And I think it’s gonna be a long long time
Till the B&S brings me round again to find
I’m not the Campari man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I’m a Bundy man…
Bundy man puking up his ring up here alone… Elton John, Bundy Man

WAtching thinks he defeated Bundyman in a cricket match recently. WAtching also believes Bundyman might be a total plonker judging from the auto embellishment. I think Bundyman might just have a far more developed sense of irony than you WAtching. With the massive viewing demographic of The Worst of Perth, it is fairly certain Bundyman will see this post, so perhaps you two can debate irony or Ford vs Holden. Click for larger. Is an Apollo a Holden worth boasting about? Looks like a dumbed down Camry to me.

Posted in worst car | Tagged , , | 142 Comments