Voyage of the Damned

Was at the Fremantle WA Maritime Museum when they were redoing the Australia 2 exhibit the other day. Seeing the mannequins up close was a shocking experience. They all appear to have been made for a zombie sex show. The note on the Ken judge says “Wooden Arms.”
When Mo's collide

I can feel your keel man.

Wooden arms

Wooden arms

cold sweat sweet heart

cold sweat sweet heart

Give us Bondy's brain...

Give us Bondy's brain...

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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33 Responses to Voyage of the Damned

  1. Rolly says:

    Spooke-e-e-y-y!!!!

    Like

  2. The Ken doll needs some drool. I was too slow with the camera to catch the curators complaining that it looked like Longley had a hard on. here is how they look on the boat.

    Like

  3. poor lisa says:

    Lucky you to get so close…

    Like

  4. forkboy says:

    I still own one of those jumpers…………………………….

    http://scifipedia.scifi.com/index.php/The_Autons

    Like

  5. …. and Autons are made out of corflute !!

    Like

  6. Cookster says:

    I’m going to have nightmares now.

    Does anyone else remember the street parade? Peter Allan on stage with Bondy? I’ll always remember someone muttering in the crowd, ‘what’s that poof doing on stage with that fat cunt?’

    Like

  7. John Bertrand may be kissing Peter Allen in the top photo.

    Like

  8. forkboy says:

    Lazy – WTF? gone corporate and had a brand consultant design logo’s?…………………..

    Like

  9. Cookster says:

    When my baby goes to Freo?

    Like

  10. Snuff says:

    Someday we’ll all be together once more, Cookster
    When all of the ships come back to the shore

    Like

  11. Groucho says:

    All these dolls were originally made for the female sex toys market and were sold through the Barbarellas outlets in James Street. Sadly, being next door to Connections the dolls became very popular within the gay community, especially the one in the front with the gapping mouth…(hey it’s true blondes have more fun). I know a guy that bought 2 and had regular threesomes and when his mates came over they used to indulge in sensless orgies and glove swapping.

    I think that is vaseline not cold sweat ….. and, just by the way, the teeth are removable,

    Like

  12. Forkboy. I usually put a logo on pics that are likely to be stolen by blogscrapers. Cookster’s tendering to take on my corporate identity.

    Like

  13. Cookster says:

    I’m more a Brand Management sorta guy, with a healthy splash of Media Relations.

    TLA, I’m surprised you haven’t ‘passed’ comment on my latest poo blog?

    All I can get out of Teh Outrage these days is, ‘disgusting’. Hasn’t been the same since he was told to lay off the herring.

    Like

  14. David Cohen says:

    My abiding memory of the America’s Cup is losing $10 (a princely sum for a 17-year-old back then) on the result.

    Cookster, I’m back at The Post next week, so we will have greater interaction. I’m fixed up for herring – but can you put me in touch with your octopus pusher, sorry, supplier? Gunna need it for sitting through those council meetings…

    Like

  15. Cookster says:

    I stayed up all night watching the race and drinking Summer Wine. Funny how some things stay the same.

    Teh Post – got a good golf yarn for ya DC… stay tuned!

    Like

  16. Cookster says:

    DC – I can lay my hands on some hydro squid straight in from Amsterdam… sticky tentacles my friend, but it’ll cost…

    Like

  17. Bento says:

    You old-timers are so out of touch. All the kids are onto the eel and dancing all night, these days.

    Like

  18. Looks like Rudd and his mates celebrating after they won Govt that warm December night.

    And Groucho, removable teeth on a blow up doll? How soft are people getting. I can sell people a real doll if anyone’s keen?

    Like

  19. Groucho says:

    Gummy jobs…..isn’t that a fetish ?

    Don’t disillusion me about what is real and what is not, No 12 is real…the facial proportions may be wrong but he is ALL DUMMY…..come to daddy !!!!

    Like

  20. David Cohen says:

    Cookster…maaate! What about mate’s rates?? Share the wealth! Bento, after a taxing day of word processing and apostrophe abuse I’m too pooped for eel and dancing. I sit at home in my cardy, fiddling with my corflute collection, listening to Radio National.

    Like

  21. Vic Demised says:

    “They said you’d ne-vah make it,
    but you fi-na-lly came through.”

    Bondy was the Hero -then…

    My year 7 sport teacher, Grant Dorrington (now chief road wowser) was the co-ordinator of the Victory parade. I recall him saying it was the greatest event that had ever happened to Perth, and if anything went wrong, he would top himself. God, I was praying so hard that some disgruntled shareholder would take a pot-shot at Bondy. Dorrington was an A-grade cunt.

    Like

  22. Frank Calabrese says:

    Speaking of the America’s Cup, Here is the theme song to Kevin Parry’s Defence of the Cup – “Kookaburra”, by the “Fremantle Doctor”

    http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=fk7THrIqAdc

    Like

  23. Frank Calabrese says:

    Found a better clip from Good Morning Australia (80’s) version) with Kerri Ann Kennell :-)

    http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=5DjKArC7s5Y

    Like

  24. Cookster says:

    DC, man, you know how it is… gotta feed the kids ‘n’ all. But I’m a good guy, I’ll throw some Durban Cuttlefish into the mix – happy?

    Even when I was living in Yarraville, Melbourne, every morning I would drive past a faded billboard on Williamstown Rd advertising Swan Premium… must have been 20 years old.

    Like

  25. Cookster says:

    Just watched that Kookaburra song… fuck me sideways! No wonder we didn’t win a race! I remember sitting in the bar at the Sail and Anchor looking up at their race ‘tally board’ and thinking what a way to rub salt into the gaping, embarrassing wound that was our Cup defence.

    Like

  26. Tony T says:

    LA, I know why you haven’t updated today: you’re watching The Andre Rieu Story on Ovation.

    Like

  27. Oh, I see why they were dusting off these horrific mannequins. They were all back in town for the anniversary.
    http://www.thewest.com.au/default.aspx?MenuID=77&ContentID=98801

    Like

  28. Cookster says:

    So Bondy really has got brain damage:

    “Australia can win another America’s Cup again, but in some respects it’s very hard to do it as a committee because decisions have to be made all the time and it’s not easy to do that.”

    No, it’s very hard to make decisions. “Should I pillage and dismember businesses for my own profit, destroying the companies and leaving management and staff without employ? Hmmm, yeah, bugger it, go on…

    Like

  29. meccano101 says:

    LA. There is an Americas cup play in rehearsal at the moment with actors types you may be familiar with. You might want to check it out.

    Like

  30. Jill Perryman as Bondy? Too obvious.

    Like

  31. Loony says:

    Forkboy,

    What size and condition is your jumper in and is it for sale?

    If so lets talk tactics: loonyfist@hotmail.com

    Like

  32. I see in the paper today that the americas cup should have gone to Antwerp not Fremantle in 1983. A cheating dutch keel was used.

    Like

  33. Pingback: Australia 2 | The Worst of Perth

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