Barcelona on Bayswater

Architecture used to be the staple of The Worst of Perth, but personalities (if you can call Howard Sattler a personality) and politics seem to have been dominant recently. So let’s get back to our roots. Don’t let anyone tell you that Western Australian architecture doesn’t have vision and flair, or that it doesn’t have the courage to dream and to innovate. Frankly I’m sick of these Gaudi and Gehry imitators clogging the city with their organic forms, their decon pomo and their exotic materials like this building in Bayswater. This sort of artifice just gives me the shits.

About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
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52 Responses to Barcelona on Bayswater

  1. tomthrett says:

    a return to form! brutal!

    Like

  2. Grrr says:

    It seems to be lacking – I don’t know – windows and doors.

    This photo has clearly been taken from the back to make it look worse than it is. I’m sure, once complete, it will be one of the finest big box retailers known to Perth.

    Next time I’m on Nicholson Road in the back blocks of Perth, or Joondalup, I really should get a photo one one of those finished horrors.

    Like

  3. Snuff says:

    Beautiful Bayswater Bauhaus, TLA, and yet my eye is unwillingly drawn to that disconcerting signage. What can it possibly say to warrant sullying such pristine unwilderness ?

    Like

  4. Snuff says:

    Windows and doors you say, Grrr ? Who needs ’em ?

    http://www.darkroastedblend.com/2007/08/when-construction-goes-wrong.html

    p.s. Part 2 is even worst.

    Like

  5. Rolly says:

    Cubism at its best.

    Like

  6. skink says:

    this is bloody marvellous

    everything that is best about Perth

    is that a ‘sold’ sign in front of it?

    it really needs a proud family stood in the sand, squinting into the sun

    leave it for three weeks and someone will put mock federation detailing on it

    Like

  7. David Cohen says:

    People are always banging on about eaves. You don’t need ’em! And the waterwise garden! This is going to win a lot of prizes.

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  8. meccano101 says:

    Fortress chic. I love it. One of those panels opens like a drawbridge. In a cormac macarthy post boom Perth. The owners will be laughing from the inside.

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  9. Tom! How was America?

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  10. Oh, I should have said it’s built in front of toxic mountain.

    Teotihuacan

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  11. A branch of the convention centre in Bayswater ? Convenience Centre II.

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  12. Cookster says:

    Mammoth in its scale – is that blue speck to the right a person standing at the foot of this behemoth?

    And is that a UFO I spy hovering above?

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  13. B.T. says:

    Its going to be an art gallery. The subtle shading of the concrete tells you that. Puts me in mind of Rothko.

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  14. David Cohen says:

    I’m told it’s Martin Whitely’s new electorate office.

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  15. CK says:

    I think there may be Japanese soldiers holed up there.

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  16. Mazarina says:

    It’s a perfect representation of Perth. A concrete tomb surrounded by a desert wasteland, under a searing blue sky. Do the inhabitants even know they are dead yet?

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  17. Snuff says:

    I knew it reminded me of somewhere, CK, and that place is the East Point Gun Turret, (with bonus worst shopped roos), in Darwin.

    Last I heard, and that was many moons ago, it’d been commandeered by the local folk music club.

    I witnessed an unbelievable Paul Kelly gig near there one full moon, when he toured with his busking band featuring himself on guitar, Chris Wilson on harp, Peter Luscombe on a stand-up snare, and someone whom for the life of me I can’t quite name at the moment, on piano accordian. Admittedly, there was lysergic involved, but I swear I’m not making this up. Any music historians out there who can name the mystery squeezeboxer ?

    Like

  18. skink says:

    a blank canvas awaiting adornment

    all that is missing is “Barra is a cunt” in six foot letters

    where are the yoof of Perth when you need them?

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  19. Adam says:

    Perth’s answer to the Beijing Water Cube?

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  20. Groucho says:

    “This sort of artifice just gives me the shits.”…..

    This is a rather large septic tank for Bayswater, but I suppose they needed one this size to service the surrounding area including all the shit from Midland.

    Like

  21. Orbea says:

    New coffin cheaters headquarters, now sandbags aren’t allowed?

    Like

  22. Ljuke says:

    It reminds me of a Rachel Whiteread.

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  23. forkboy says:

    paint it gloss black….call it a “monolith” and await the spiritual evolution\transformation of the Bayswaterites?………….maybe not.

    Like

  24. Maybe then Forkie they would advance to using sticks as weapons then we’ll all be in danger.

    Like

  25. forkboy says:

    Your Billship @ 24 – they need thumbs to operate sticks effectively….so I think we are safe for a while.

    Like

  26. meccano101 says:

    I don’t think that you shot it at the right time of day L.A. Apparently a dusk it changes colour, You used to be allowed to climb it but I don’t think that it is allowed any more.

    Like

  27. skink says:

    perhaps it is a large reproduction of Manzoni’s “Base of the World”, just waiting for the text to be added

    Like

  28. Snuff says:

    So that’s what the sign says, meccano101 !

    http://tinyurl.com/5ban5r

    I thought it looked like a dingo.

    Like

  29. David Cohen says:

    or a Borg spaceship waiting for Jean-Luc Picard to arrive.

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  30. forkboy says:

    the sign says “danger! mine field”

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  31. Rolly says:

    Not “Achtung! Mein Kampf,” forkie?

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  32. Snuff says:

    Yours might have field, forkboy, but mine explodes.

    http://tinyurl.com/59whms

    For all you mine otaku out there, of course it’s a German naval mine detonating horn. You can find it on this charming site, entitled “Solving the Whatziss…”, posted on July 31, 2007.

    http://tinyurl.com/6gxy3n

    Like

  33. tomthrett says:

    lazy aussie! you took notice of my post! im so flattered! i am still in america, getting my fix of ‘worst’ in la. if you think we have bad concrete boxes in perth, come to la! its like osborne park for 70 ks.

    Like

  34. well if you see anything particularly egregious that doesn’t suit your site, pass it on. I have international worsts on the weekend.

    Like

  35. I can still be surprised by you devils. I thought this one would only be mildly interesting, but it was one of the biggest days for a long time. This post only fell short of election night numbers by a handful.
    TWOP readers are riddles wrapped in enigmas wrapped in…something else.

    Like

  36. B.T. says:

    Concrete boxes are more interesting than WA politics.

    Like

  37. Bill O'Slatter says:

    Tex , I don’t see McCain holding a chair over his head and singing “wicky wacky woo” nor do I see that Sarah A Pallin ,despite her moose hunting goodness , have a fascination for trains to irrelevant places , nor does Obama run around ala Brian Burke goosing political candidates.You have it all here folks in W.A. politics but at this stage our political bbq gryll has lucked off.

    Like

  38. Johnny Nonation says:

    Is it a mausoleum? RIP.

    Like

  39. Oh for fuck sake people, it’s the latest Homeswest aged development in Clarkson. Let’s see those nasty youth beat the shit out of a WW2 digger now.

    Like

  40. Snuff says:

    Looks like MAD Ltd to me. http://tinyurl.com/3nly8p

    Like

  41. Rolly says:

    Love that MAD stuff. Kinky, man, kinky.

    Like

  42. Snuff says:

    On second thoughts, Rolly, I think it’s looking more like Torafu.

    http://torafu1.exblog.jp/9543100/

    Like

  43. Rolly says:

    Shapes like that make good swell busters on the seaward side of breakwaters.

    Like

  44. The Bartender's skills with a Manhatten says:

    I am three years late to the party, but I have to admit as a Louis Kahn junkie I love this picture.

    I assume some form of brick cloaking was added later. A shame.

    %99.9999999 of people who screech about how modern architecture is a break with classicism are unaware that most of ancient Rome looked like, well, this building.

    The remaining percent consist of myself and three professors at Yale, evidently.

    Like

  45. The Legend 101 says:

    LOL its a vaicant property aswell i think its barcelona. Also theres a little shop in Malaga called Bali In Malaga it has balinese stuff.

    Like

  46. Pingback: New Perth Public Architecture Forum | The Worst of Perth

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