Devastating photo by Pete F. Really we’re fucked. This is the end. Not even the Hudson River Valley could offer such a hideous dystopia. The fallen sign says “Adorno and Horkheimer out – Gina Reinhart in.”
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The Worst of Perth 
Don’t tempt me.
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HRV Skimpys.
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No love for Red Hook’s severed pig head BBQ wagon?
But I will have to make a trek to darkest Town of Ulster and see if my camera will actually take pictures of the mall without the lens shattering.
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Yes. Later today.
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without doubt the finest Worst of the year
it has everything – blue sky, visual pollution, rotting palm fronds, telegraph poles, lumpy sidewalks, utes, weedy mulch, skimpies, tattoos, piercing, bellicose overpaid selfish rednecks and a ten dollar counter lunch.
that’s the whole of Perth, right there.
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Yes this is Perth. This is actually quite depressing to look at.
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And you just know there’s a shopping trolley parked in those bushes. We can all go home now.
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Yes, I haven’t stopped weeping since I set my eyes upon.
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You forgot to mention 6 lanes of traffic on the FIFO Freeway.
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The fallen sign more likely says “Registered Lawn”.
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Has the fallen frond been tagged?
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How do I Worst thee? Let me count the ways.
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Click for the large photo and scour every centimetre. There’s even ciggie butts in the “mulch”. It’s like some elaborate set for a photoshoot.
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If I may add to the list: rock damaged sign.
It’s the attention to detail that makes this piece. It’s like a “can you spot the differences” puzzle where the second image is of a place that isn’t a shithole, which is, of course, in your head.
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Everything is perfect. The British Expats need to uderstand that it is every element coming together that makes this great. Yes tits and beer sound good at 11am, but it is the depressing reality in the setting of this cornucopia of shite that is the point.
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I think the Floating Meat Pie of Doom is my favorite feature.
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As opposed to the iconic Adelaide culinary offering, of a pie floater…
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I suspect our British Expat friends might love those, and I must admit that every time I’ve
gotten so drunk thatbought one, they’ve absolutely hit the spot.LikeLike
Tax out at Slaves Inn. Last stop on the road to FIFO hell, get yer branes out.
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It’s remarkable how effectively the redneck right has been brainwashed that the sky will fall if the rich have to pay tax on their billions. Might lose that jet ski, HSV and giant flat screen.
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Agreed. I have complete faith Wayne Swan and Stephen Conroy will spend my income more effectively than I ever could.
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You’re a mine owner?
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Not last time I checked.
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Finally a place where I can get some ogling in before lunch.
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I was hoping to get the guy having a durrie in the pub doorway as well but he didn’t seem too keen. Glad this pic was worth turning around and coming back for.
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I’ve got the 6×6 medium format filled with a roll of ektachrome. I should go out there. After 11 obviously.
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Worth it? It’s a heroic effort. Innaloo and Osborne Park could deliver this level of visual pollution, but never the perfect storm of actual content. Glorious.
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Pingback: Red Hook new York | The Worst of Perth
That’s just before the turnoff for Perth Airport. If anything, it has actually improved since I lived in WA. Stay classy Redcliffe!
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What is a skimpy?
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Dude, I hoped you would ask that. A skimpy is the registered lawn of barmaids. The sign is asserting that the barmaid after 11am will be sans uper clothing – or at least will have transparent clothing. A dispiriting and depressing spectacle. Picture a young woman without a top serving mumbling old derelicts and other freedom fighters in an ugly bar.
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I’m not talking about this particular bar, but there are frequent tales of arrests when the skimpy takes it one step too far.
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We want sleaze. We don’t want sleaze. We want sleaze. We don’t want sleaze. Repeat ad nauseum.
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Here I thought it might be a half-portion breakfast for light eaters/budget conscious folk/people commuting.
No. No HRV skimpies. A couple of pole dancers up around Saugerties and some gay go-go-boys in New Paltz but that’s about as sleazy as we get.
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A skimpy must be at the same time depressing and dispiriting. There must always be the tension that she might – for a couple of dollars bury the visage of some broken old derelict in her cleavage, and then move on to gamble the price of a jug of the shittiest lager with the toss of a coin. Man, you need to come here to experience the skimpy culture.
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I remember reading about a skimpy in Kalgoorlie who was making so much money she could afford to be based in Brisbane. A FIFO skimpy! There’s your 2-speed economy, right there.
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But I imagine the Redcliffe Tavern skimpies just get the 209 from Belmont, which probably costs about the same as a 3 second nipple exposure.
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I seem to remember a skimpy commenting on a post years ago. She called looser on us.
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That she did.
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Goodness me, there was a 3 years too late skimpy recruiting attempt on this blog.
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I remember when, for a small consideration, the skimpy would knock the froth off the top of your beer with her bosom.
those were the days, eh, when beer had froth.
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Good Old Titmey Beers.
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DD economy.
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Valerie with her tits hanging down to her navel.
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I sense a redundancy.
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Critical that it be both dispiriting and depressing. Much like the mien of the skimpy which must be both sullen AND surly.
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Google search brought up this article, featuring the tavern in question.
http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/a/-/wa/12481530/perth-lives-up-to-macho-label/
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Skimpy Mrs Mac
Gets her butt and palms pierced
In the night car wash.
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When a BP servo is the best you can find. British expat site linking here. Lots of “If this is bad, Perth can’t be so bad then!” comments.
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Well it’s the blue sky you see. Gets em every time.
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Beers and burgers, breasts,
ten fifty. Chook or fish, but,
will cost you, faggot.
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Nice one.
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Tis a beautiful thing.
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‘Parking at side and rear.’ I find THAT an extraordinary thing to put on a sign. It’s Perth! You think we’ll make you walk?
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How gypped would you feel if you parked at the side rather than the rear for you moronic tattoo?
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or the sign should be “Poker in the front, liquor in the rear”
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Is that like “rape all the cattle kill all the women”?
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