Wanted to try for the magic 500 000 page views before I left work today, so a quick media rant.
How often have we heard that blogs are parasites on legitimate newspapers? Lots of times. There is still apparently traction in the bloggers versus journos debate, often to be found on sites like The Content Makers etc. Journalists are shaking their fists crying “You’ll miss us when we’re gone.” as their flagships sink under them. The solution apparently from The West Australian is to fluff up a story about a blog, heavily padded with quotes from a blog. Add virtually no other thought or opinion, and hey presto, a piece of crap!
Paul Murray now has a challenger in the fields of “excessive quoting to increase word count” and “bum numbing boredom” at next years Walkleys. In fact, Murray’s piece on Nickel exports through Esperance is positively Pulitzer compared to this one by Matthew Moore. The pink is quotes from the blog and blogger. Terrible. When are we going to see some action from Kerry and Cronin? Is THIS the sort of thing that’s going to increase circulation guys?
A commenter has just noted that this is a buy in from UK. They bought it? Is this an admission of defeat? The actual blog has some funny stuff in it. The rehash doesn’t.
And just by the by, does Kovacs write exactly the same column every week about the English language?
The Worst of Perth 
Perhaps we could have our own thread:
1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
I’ll set the ball rolling:
1. Assume that the dolts in Perth never read any media from outside the state, which leaves you free to cut and paste copy from other sources safe in the knowledge that nobody here is wise to it, even if it happened last week.
over to you…
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Matthew Moore is clearly a glove puppet, I just hope for his sake the puppetmaster trimmed their finger nails. How about the immortal fatherly advice “Don’t drop kick on a wet day”, “Beer will make your dick limp” and “women wear make-up and perfume because they’re ugly and they stink”?
“Spend a summer swiping mobile phones from tables and selling to hock shops”.
“there’s nothing wrong with musical theatre?- what a cunt!”
PS Thanks Dad!
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Like the article that ran over Christmas about the facebook group petition to overturn the banning of images of breastfeeding mothers – ummm, I saw / read / was invited to join that group mid last year.
Was it simply an opportunity to publish a picture of a woman breastfeeding and look all hip by putting facebook in the paper?
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Zoltan Kovacs used to be the West’s Education writer in the 70’s & 80’s and then went to edit the WA Eduvcation News for the Education Dept.
I think he is pining for the return of Jim Clarko as Education Minister :-)
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2. Record TV & Radio Bulletins to get leads on stories – Monitor Simon Beaumont & Howard Sattler for ideas, get Adshead to do a cross-promotional piece for Today Tonight.
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1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
Drive a Sigma. It suits you.
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I bet he didn’t even draw that picture.
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Shouldn’t that be Kipling’s spirit lives on pastes Matthew Moore?
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1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
4. Try and find a story containing gratuitous nudity, and illustrate the story with a racy photo. When readers write to complain, use the controversy as an excuse to reprint the photo.
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1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
5. Use your Husband/Wife/Partner who is a member of a Teachers Lobby Group who oppose a socially progressive issue like the OBE and write stories based on their Talking Points.
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1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
Don’t laugh at colleagues who have to work at The Quokka. Your Sigma might be in there next week.
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Congratulations are in order – now was it myself, Skink, Cookster or Ljuke or even your good self who hit the magic figure ?? :-)
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It doesn’t count me, otherwise it would be 2 million by now.
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1001 Rules
7. It is now acceptable to start a sentence with a preposition. And it is also acceptable to have sentences without verbs in them, because they sound punchy. Like this.
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I didn’t want to burn my eyes by looking at the graphic too long (yes, even a scanned image from Teh Worst could do unfathomable damage), but they don’t even cite the URL, do they?
It’s http://rulesformyunbornson.tumblr.com/ and MUCH better than the story implies.
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How in Christ is Wear a Tshirt Plain good advice. I would punch my Dad in the throat if that’s all he had to give me. I can’t believe the West would validate some shitty blog’s shitty opinions.
Actually what am I saying, let me rephrase that:
8/ Validate all shitty opinions
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1001 Rules for a Bone Idle West Australian Churnalist
9. To ensure the drunken bogans and racists ruin the Australia Day Celebrations by publishing $2 Tokens for readers buy 50c Australian “Car” Flags
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Why not have a permanent talk back radio column covering the 2 that attempt it in Perth,or just one for both .
I,m sure it would be compulsive reading for our two talking opinion makers or so they think.
What can one say about the Worst,words fail me,but the fellow who asked if West Australians read anything else,unfortunately no
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BREAKING NEWS !!!!!!
According to ABC TV News, Paul Armstrong “Left The Paper Today” by “Mutual Agreement”.
I wonder if he jumped, or was pushed :-)
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According to TWAT, Limpwrist has been dumped.
http://www.watoday.com.au/wa-news/west-australian-editor-armstrong-has-been-dumped-20090115-7hzy.html
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John Ryan. Someone would have to listen to the crap. Downside.
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First time caller, long time listener.
The column in question is by a UK journalist from the UK Daily Telegraph, published there on January 13, but don’t let that stop you. Pile on.
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Wow, no more Paul Armstrong.
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From one of my spies: Staff were summoned to the back bench at 5.56 for a short talk by Bob Cronin, saying that Paul was “no longer” the editor.
When asked “the manner of his leaving”, Bob replied: “He left in his shiny red car” (which got a few nervous chuckles).
Bob said there was no new editor in view and he would run the paper meantime.
Interesting times!
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This is how The Worst has reported the news. and according to the updated TWAT story, Limpwrist will “receieve a significant payout”
http://www.thewest.com.au/default.aspx?MenuID=77&ContentID=118346
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So Gareth so the WHOLE article was cut and pasted by the west. Jeez, I don’t even think Murray has done 100 percent before. I notice they don’t mention they bought it. Surely Eoin cameron could have… I’ve said too much.
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Hmm, I wonder if Limpwrist was boned after it was discovered about the origins of the above column, AND today’s retraction in Inside Cover re the CEO of the Shire of Shark Bay having his glowing reference provided by Eric Charleton, rather than Mark McGowan, thereby derailing the ALP Attack nature of Pothead’s series of “Articles”.
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This does look vaguely familiar, TLA.
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I love this “Comment” from Perth Now – must be from Armstrong himself (or his Mother).
http://www.news.com.au/perthnow/comments/0,21590,24918135-948,00.html
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BTW, Perth Now’s extended story is an excellent essay of Limpwrist’s tenure as Editor, and mentions as it’s bisggest fuck up Paul Nurry’s “Story” on the HMAS Sydney :-)
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Frank,
That’s much along the lines of “I want to congratulate the organisers of the BeerFest…………..”
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TLA – it’s pretty standard practice in newspapers all around the world to syndicate columns and other content. Anyway, love your work.
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But normally the source of the article is attributed in the by-line, either at the top, or at the end of the article – The West, in this case, did neither.
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Yes, I know that, but really it’s saying they can’t even write pap themselves. I can understand buying in a piece from someone with some particular expertise, insight or access, ie UK correspondent, or it expert etc, but buying in a fluff piece that Pam Caselllllas could have written on the bog, is absolutely ridiculous.
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And that’s half a million hits that Fairfax could have had if they’d bothered to answer my emails.
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I read this article today while i was at work, although such a waste of print when they could be pasting the pages with non-senesicle(testicle) articles about the financial crisis, i enjoyed reading this tripe. I inspire myself to take some of these pointers. Like the one: “Stop talking once your point is made” which is what i am going to do now.
Mike
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Well I listened to Beaumont on 6PR today to see what he had to say,he seems to think that Armstrong was a good editor.
So he then complained about people not signing e mails ect all I can say is one down one to go,I sent an e mail but I don’t think he will read it.
Correction he did read it,I am suprised
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He’s got those massive Kahunas don’t forget.
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It’s kinda hard to take Zoltran Kovacs seriously given he was Dr Carmen’s minder during that whole deadful Penny Easten thing. I mean wouldn’t he have at least bent the truth a bit in Lawrence’s memory fuck up/cover up?. Doesn’t really say much for his respect for syntax.
But we are forgiving lot, aren’t we? Our sympathy goes to Geoff Parry after his heart attack as we forget how he hounded that poor person in her garage just before she topped herself. Meanwhile, John Haldern, who tabled the petition (should that read death warrent?), runs a PR firm. Jeez, his customers must be a bunch of ruthless pricks.
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List of ruthless pricks:
https://secure.dpc.wa.gov.au/lobbyistsregister/index.cfm?event=viewProfile&profileID=41
Name: Community Employers WA
Rewards Management Pty Ltd
Philip Morris Ltd
Perth Pork Wholesale Company
Moly Mines Ltd
D’Orsogna Ltd
REIWA
DLA Phillips Fox
Country Arts WA
Mitsubishi Development Pty Ltd
Picardy Pty Ltd
OPR
Westpork Pty Ltd
Craig Mostyn & Co Pty Ltd
Bemax Resources NL
Acciona Agua
Westfield Ltd
United Utilities Australia Pty Ltd
Town of Kwinana
TFS Corporation
Sun Microsystems Australia Ltd
Evolution Yachts
Strzelecki Holdings Pty Ltd
South Metropolitan Regional Council
Serco Australia Pty Ltd
SBSK (Australia) Pty Ltd
East Metropolitan Regional Council
North Port Quay Holdings Pty Ltd
Perth Radiological Clinic
Polyline Industries
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I must disagree with Mike. If someone stops talking once their point is made, it is a relief to the listener, but of no advantage to the point maker.
People who want their points to be taken, rather than just made, drone on mercilessly, until all surviving listeners are in agreement, if only because they must say yes in order to get away.
I think this was Armstrong’s editorial policy.
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Certainly John Halden’s.
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And Bob Maumill was suggesting that he wanted to invite Limpwrist to do an hour on 6PR with him – though Sattler was VERY scathing of him, citing the “Pensioner” in the Waiting Room debacle.
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Incestuous, isn’t it, this little fantasy world of the ‘Meeja’?
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it would be interesting to hear Limpwrist talking on the radio because
a. he never acknowledges that other media exist
b. he does not believe himself to be accountable.
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And Bob Maumill, why don’t you answer MY emails about a Worst of perth interview?
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Halden certainly loves his pork!
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barrelling
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I need to be wary about libel and Zoltan here, but I remember hearing a story that might well have been ersatz about his stint on the West Oz back in the late 70s.
This is more of an observation of how bloated and inert the West had become…but apparently Zoltan and a mate had a bet to see how long they could go without writing a word before someone actually noticed.
Story goes it was about three months before a colleague stopped Zoltan on the stairs and casually remarked they hadn’t seen a yarn from him for a while.
I heard this when I was a junior reporter with Community Newspapers circa 1985 and Zolten was then media flack for Greg Pearce, WA education minister
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I think you mean BOB Pearce – Greg, who is on Ch 9 was at one time a member of the Liberal Party, and was once touted for pre-selection in Dawesville to replace Arthur Marshall.
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….on second thoughts, having read the bile and colourful epithets above about various people I probably don’t need to worry about libel at all!! ;)
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Ah Frank, you are indeed right…..but it was a few years ago afterall!
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That comment is fine Adrian. There are often ones put up that I have to remove, usually allegations of criminal activity, but yours is more of the amusing story.
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And Greg Pearce, now we’re talking worst. Never has high definition been as unwelcome as when greg’s cracked and broken bonce appears on the screen. I a shot of Greg in the queue.
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No worries Indolent Aussie,
Apparently Zoltan and his mate would come in and read the paper, go for a long, languid, liquid lunch across the road at the Palace Hotel (this was when West Oz was at 125 St George St) and return to their typwriters to, er, do nothing.
This during his stint as education hack.
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A-h-h-h! Adrian,
“We ‘ad lot’s o’ things in them days that yer don’t ‘av terday:
‘itler, Diphtheria,Rickets…….”
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And actually his activities seem to fall into the not worst category. More power to to his drinking arm.
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As far as Armstrong and the West Oz, you have to admit it takes a man of rare talent indeed to stuff up a paper in a monopoly market!
I left Perth in 1986, but who remembers when Perth actually had a few rags?
West Oz
Daily News
Weekend News
Western Mail
Sunday Independent
Sunday Crimes
Then there was that god awful Times of the West that went daily for about three days and ran out of money, a blessing given it was as good as a turd in a freezer.
I think the West had a stable of suburban papers for a while, and then of course there was Community Newspapers started by Simon Hadfield (sic).
I remember poor old Andre Malan when he was “recruiting” for the Western Mail in early 1986 when Homlsey said it was going to go daily to knock the West Oz.
I walked into the newly built offices (up the road from Newspaper house, where the West Oz eventually took up residence I understand) and found Andre standing in the middle of this huge empty void.
I remember challenging him whether the damn thing would ever get off the ground, and he inveigled that I look around.
“Just look at this place, if we don’t t go daily and keep running a Sunday it would be like taking a jumbo jet to Rottnest,” he exclaimed.
He asked if I wanted to be police reporter and took me into this very nice sound proof glass booth in the middle of the newsfloor which was going to be home to the police round.
We sat there for a while listening to the police scanner.
He took me outside and shook my hand and said it would be up and running by mid 1986 before disapearing down St George Tce announcing he was “off to poach a couple of the West’s best hands”.
I quite liked Andre, but never saw him again.
BTW…are they flying jumbos to Rotto these days?
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The Lazy Aussie’s uncle was cartoonist for The Sunday independent.
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Alas you can’t listen to the police anymore as they’ve now gone to a digital encrypted radio network (though Country coppers are still analogue and occasionally you might here the metro analogue link if a country car visits the big smoke) and the Chief of Staff now have access to a “filtered” version of the Police CAD system which may be delayed by up to 30 minutes or sensitive jobs may not be shown at all, but of course there is still the firies and ambos to listen to, hence the lack of juicy major crimes being reported instantly and the rise in “amateur footage” on the TV News bulletins.
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Frank, that sounds like a typical bloody police state!!!!!
Bet we don’t do that over here in Sydney! ;)
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Alas they do – NSW Police switched on the encryption just a few weeks prior to the Pope’s visit and their filtered system is a lot worse according to some media reports I’ve read. NSW Police were one of the last states to go encrypted, even though they were running their digital network in the clear for some time.
Info from the NSW Police Association here.
Click to access Police_News_June3-9.pdf
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Adrian,
Here is a Daily Terrorgraph story on the Police Radio System.
http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/comments/0,22058,24344146-5001030,00.html
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Frank,
The bastards!!!!
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Adrian, as there is no language restriction on TWOP, we’d be more likely to say “The cunts!!!!!” But different strokes eh? There is no exclamation mark restriction either.
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The new bastards!!!!
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note however that the inappropriate use of apostrophes will incite ridicule from pedants
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And udda growd-ubs doo, skingk.
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oh Lordy, now the West has got Big Pam writing about the mining industry.
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The CUNTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Phew, that felt strangely cunthartic!)
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“normally the source of the article is attributed in the by-line, either at the top, or at the end of the article – The West, in this case, did neither.”
The West have a strange protocol with regard to other people’s content – they also normally don’t attribute wire stories to the respective wire services, even when they run them with bylines. I’ve never seen that done in any other paper.
Also, while I highly doubt this is the same Matthew Moore, I once met the SMH’s Matthew Moore. His first words after introducing himself were “have you heard of me?”
Didn’t have the hear to tell him that no, I hadn’t. (I think he is now their freedom of information editor or some such.)
That was one of the weirdest conversations I’ve ever had — who t.f. has heard of the freedom of information editor in an Aussie newspaper, even a big one?
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