If you two so called celebrities can still harden your hearts and not come to Perth after seeing this photo, then I hope you both end up in hell. Soon. And although I hate both your shows, (Ellen, you seem demented, and Oprah you appear as an overly cheerful moron,) many Perth people think you are cool and that our city would somehow be more vibrant after a visit from youse, notwithstanding how hideous you both appear me. So think about it.
Your humble servant TLA.
Photo by Chris S.
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The Asia Beat
The Worst of Perth 
Ahh, the STS. From an inconveniently isolated part of the inner suburbs, to an inconveniently isolated part of the city, in just over triple the time it would take to drive. How could it possibly fail?
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You forgot to mention the completely inconvenient timetable, never mind the circular logic that cutting services leads to falling patronage which means you might as well cut services.
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She’s bringing her own audience. What does that say about her popularity if she doesn’t think she can even fill a TV studio? 50 Cent played Burswood Dome ferchrissakes.
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Looking at the second shot, I can almost see a bloodied Terry Malloy staggering up the jetty.
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With a return ticket to palookaville?
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wrong boxer
the STS featured prominently in ‘Two Fists, One Heart’, with the two protagonists travelling to and fro on the thing as if it actually went somewhere.
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Are you not convinced Rai frequently enjoys the delights of the Zoo and the Belltower? Or is it the Windsor and the Shag?
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http://post.polls.yahoo.com/quiz/quizresults.php
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Today’s Poll
1819 votes since Sep 13 2010
Should the State Government lobby to ensure Oprah visits WA?
Yes 40% 730 votes
No 60% 1089 votes
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Count me in the NO poll above. God… all we need is to feed her EGO aswell as her backside.
meh
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Perhaps Colin could persuade Sally Jesse Raphael or Phil Donohue to come to Perth? Surely they’d be more our speed.
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Jerry Springer?
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Now that would be perfect.
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Come on, don’t people remember this ??
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Nope, Frank, but thanks. I particularly like the WTF pause before Kambalda.
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I was born in this year……1979.
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lol cooo…who knew? wild life park!
and yes no one gets out of Perth without having to suffer lawn bowls
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She should take her butler to Butler.
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and her dogs to Dog Swamp.
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She should go rapping in Tapping.
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Have a lie down in Bedford?
Drive a Car in Carramar?
Amble through Embleton?
Fuck you Darch. You’re ruining it for everyone…
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Have a banana in Kwinana,
Polony in Rockingham.
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vent her spleen in Girrawheen
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I like the idea that you could “take a darch”, or “drop a darch”.
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“Just dropping the kids off in Darch”?
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“Just dropping a Darch for the kids”
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Agreed.
A ‘darch’ would perhaps be the one you do after a big night out. Unspectacular, superficially comparable to many previous examples, and yet somehow disastrously awful.
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Man, I feel like Darch this morning.
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I ate a dodgy curry last night a woke up with a nasty bout of Dianella
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…and my Darch was a lovely shade of Camillo…
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Be careful, there could be blood in Darch.
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Jeez I gave it a nudge last night, have to go and “Phone Darch” on the big white telephone.
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I hope noone wants to “drop Darch off at the pool” at the same time.
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Monosyllabic
Words never suited it there
thus we called it Darch
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She could go to the toilet Innaloo
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No she couldn’t. Miss Oprah is a civilized and po-lite American lady. She uses the ‘restroom’, the ‘washroom’ or maybe even the ‘bathroom’, but she never goes to the ‘toilet’. She probably can’t even say the word out loud in public.
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she could stick her hand upper swan.
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she could stick her hand upper swan – I was almost in tears at that one. Nice work Vegan.
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Despite The West’s inveigling, Oprah’s has obviously Madely her mind up, but of course we wish her every Success regardless.
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Yes, she’d never be far from Success, tho occasionally down to Leighton’s Hores for a swim. Kerplash.
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Less is more, Morley less.
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Claremont, I’m sure she’d rather Swanbourne around Cottesloe and Peppermint her Grove in Mossman Park.
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or she can ride around Miami with Will Smith and look at 2 palms and a housing estate sign. Or go to Rockingham and…..send an email to Jerry Springer or declare the dire need for a finishing school for young ladies there
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Get Menora upya
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I feel if Perth Currambined and reDoubleviewed our efforts, telling them if they should Carine our way, they needn’t Warwick about whether we’d treat them in a Kingsley manner they’re accustomed to while Karrinyup their room service, plus they’ll too have a Merriwa time over here in bringing their brand of Hillarys to us, Iluka chances of them Padbury Beldon over backwards and Woodvale themselves Two Rocks up and appear in Pearsall.
If they don’t, it’ll Balcattastrophe when someone will pull a Trigg-er on them, the Scarborough on their souls!
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Everyone’s been holding back on the puns of late, and then all of a sudden … spruut.
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When she is here and she is busted jaywalking near Rockingham she can exclaim: “you warn, bro’?”
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On the other hand, if she likes it, she might coo “gee…”
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But who these days can Anketell?
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Atwell that ends well.
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If she does get busted down Rocky way, we would have to assume that she’s Wellard.
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She’ll be able to get anything in Hocking
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Especially in White Cum Valley
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Mount Pleasant ?
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depends whether oprah was on top or not.
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Look, Oprah has a quiz to test your knowledge of Australia:
http://www.oprah.com/oprahshow/Test-Your-Australia-Knowledge
not one bloody question about Don Bradman, although Kalgoorlie will be pissed off that they appear in the quiz but she won’t be visiting:
http://www.kalminer.com.au/Regionals.aspx?MenuID=326&ContentId=167646
I got six out of ten, but that question about aspirin is fucking wrong
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I got four. A lot of those questions are somewhat of a lucky dip. Should make this the migration test – no one would get in! (I’m having a little 6PR moment, ahem).
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You shortsighted simpletons. Always erring on the side of ignorance instead of seeing how the benefits to your state outweigh your reclusive wowser comfort zone.
Anyways your backwater state deserves to be isolated ever more. Especially if you cannot keep up with the tourism other states get. And if you are too bogan to understand how this global market works, then to hell with your smallminded city stuck in the 80s. You would only be a blight on Oprah’s timetable. Better you sink than swim. You make me embarrassed to call myself Australian, having to acknowledge you lot.
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You’re sending out mixed messages. Are we simpletons for wanting Oprah or not wanting Oprah?
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I think he’s saying the Shelley Taylor-Smith is sinking. Not clear whether this is a good or bad thing.
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are you a lesbian?
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I have no clue as to what you are attempting to convey, PerthReject.
Pro or Anti Oprah?
Besides, shouldn’t you be at the Walkleys?
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What a great steaming mess of illogical pottage we have here. All grammatically correct needless to say. “Blight on Oprah’s timetable”. I think Oprah may have had a few too many blights on her timetable. “Embarrassed to call myself Australian” you treacherous dog. Sir you are not fit to be in the company of great Australians like Julian Assange. And finally sir I say Fuck Oprah .
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I see what’s going on. As your name implies you were rejected by Perth and now harbour animosity towards those of us lucky enough to remain and take the piss from the inside. Fair enough, I’d be upset about Perth rejecting me too.
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*cringe*
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Suspiciously absent from media checkin for Oprah at Fiddy Square. Outrage Cohen. Perhaps too busy spewing after Walkleys last night. Woman with no neck (bishop?) doing piece to camera. Was hoping to get a glimpse of cock head Kochy but also no show.
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After the oprah concert at the opera house in sydney all the audiance where already selling the Oprah Neclaces that she gave them on Ebay for as low as $4.00 the neclace is fancy and golden (Worth $400). I can’t believe it what bad fans LOL.
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