The Best of Banned by The West

The Best of my Banned by The West newsfeed this week. Current news alerts are in the sidebar, or subscribe to them all with The Worst of Perth rss news feed so you don’t miss any gold.

I have had several people asking why the news reports are truncated, both here and on Twitter. They are not cut off! They are crafted to the final letter.


Mayan calendar had Queens Birthday & Showday. Scholars are dicovering how accurate the Mayan calendar was. All Australian public holidays as…

Coalition forces destroy The Tempest. Mistaking “Caliban” for “Taliban” a Bell Shakespeare cultural exchange performance in Karachi was hit…

Bud Tingwell’s deathbed regret. Family members say the beloved actor’s last words were Why did I agree to be in that piece of shit The Castle?…

Sex slavery common fate for Eurovision losers. Eurovision has been a passport to Serbian brothels more often than stardom says 4 Corners pro…

“Yankee hop home!” The Chinese Govt has mandated German or French accents for Chinese hip hop artists singing in English. Singers using Amer…

Pope names Jesus “Honorary Jew”. Pope Benedict XVI told Israeli leaders to “forget about it” regarding Jesus’ death as the tour of the Holy…

Hello Kitty bullets show China has come of age. Condemned prisoners forced to buy own bullets for execution now have a range of fashion ammo…

105 yo Gosnells woman attributes her longevity to being asaulted, robbed, and her house burning down from meth lab fire next door. “It’s bee…

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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6 Responses to The Best of Banned by The West

  1. Big Ramifications says:

    Bud Tingwell recently appeared in my letterbox in a glossy piece of junk mail endorsing a GUARANTEED $TOCK PICKING computer program. He was wearing his serious and trustworthy mug. Had his signature and everything.



  2. Bill O'Slatter says:

    Shouldn’t that be fartprint ? As in Freo has a large carbon fartprint. ( Hat tip the Nurries)


    • Bill O'Slatter says:

      but obviously not due to meat eating.


    • Those news results will disappear to be replaced by new, so you might have to paste them in if you want to comment. Won’t make much sense soon. I assume you mean…

      Meat eaters carbon arseprints larger than carbon footprints – study. 1 Meat lover pizza fart has 9 times the yearly greenhose gases of a cow…


  3. rhubarb says:

    The Worst gets better each day…but don’t worry too much about the English language.

    You can work out for yourself what “a lexicon appropriate to the readership” means! Bloody gibberish, probably.
    Sent: Tuesday, 19 May 2009 1:57 PM
    To: Feasubs CCI
    Subject: Wire – what’s up

    The new publication Wire is offstone Tuesday 3pm and every Tuesday thereafter. Copy is now in copy editor under WIRE. Most of it will be found in the yellow zone. Treat as you would a Seven or West Week story. Editor Ben O’Shea has asked that we keep the readership 18 to 35 years in mind when subbing and not to be too pedantic with language. It will have a heavy focus on local music. Ben says contribs will be using a lexicon appropriate to the readership and music fans and asks that we leave it as much as possible or query him or Simon.


We can handle the worst

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