Four Backwards Steps

Come on Perth, I thought we were Post Vibrant now? We are backsliding back to pre vibrancy. 4 examples.

1: The shitty bronze of Governor Stirling,(recently shamed as some kind of Pedo by Dodgy Perth – the Gov, not the statue) unveiled by Prince Charles, had mercifully been relegated to storage. Some bright spark wants it put back in the centre of the city where there is such a dearth of shitty bronzes, that the public is crying out for one we thought had been got rid of.

2: A new venue called Jack Rabbit Slims is to open. Were there not more original ideas or names available? Maybe Moes Tavern? Or how about Cheers? Nice to be given the heads up that the proponent ran out of ideas before even fucking starting.

Ditto East Village. You are in William Street not New York. Take your Bronx Pizza and mason jars and fuck off.

And someone asked for a comment on the proposed flange based public artwork for Elizabeth Quay. Would it really be too much to ask for a piece that people would actually want to come down and see, rather than another lame tame space filler? (although I did like this artists piece outside StGeorges Cathedral). How about we put Pedo Stirling there instead?

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
This entry was posted in worst name, worst public art and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

44 Responses to Four Backwards Steps

  1. vegan says:

    east??? do they have no concept of direction?

    Like

  2. Bento says:

    Another fine example of the ‘plonked shape’ school of WA public art.

    Like

  3. Sir Bill International says:

    Who going to do a bronze of Bondy out the front of Obs City ?, and was “Living next door to Alan” an appropriate goodbye to him ?

    Like

  4. Arcadia says:

    Stirling – officially a pedo? The Captain Pedo Hotel? City of Pedo? And what if I want to drive from the arrondissement to Fremantle – with my KIDS? Pedo Highway is it.? No thank you.

    Like

  5. El Guisto says:

    I remember when the were calling king st the “Paris” end of Perth….1 fuckin street! Do any of these morons ever move out of this redneck chicken shit retard state???????

    Like

  6. you'll get wet says:

    ‘But Perth has changed.’

    But the people haven’t.

    Hic Semper Perth
    You can always take the hic out of up but you can NEVER take the hick out of Perth.

    Like

  7. you'll get wet says:

    If Perth people had changed, The West wouldn’t still be selling the same product they did a generation ago. They know their audience and market,

    Perth’s challenge is to embrace it’s inner hick, let him and her come out to play. Culture can come from that. All else in inauthentic. It’s why we laugh at Winton, and why he’s popular – the inner hick is on display, pretending to be a sophisticate. Randolph Stow rejected his inner hick and fled from the sort of people Winton now embraces and writes about.

    In the meantime, the highly regarded classicist Frankie Howerd had it right – Castigat Ridendo Mores – he or she corrects manners by laughing at them. Or was it ‘Amo Amas Amat and More’ Ehrlich, Harper and Row 1985. No I’m sure it was Howerd. .

    Like

  8. rottobloggo says:

    Is “(milk)shaking” a euphemism?

    Like

    • you'll get wet says:

      ‘squid races’ is/was the authentic Freo hick euphemism

      Like

      • rottobloggo says:

        Ok. “See you out the back of the National for a squid race.”?

        Like

        • you'll get wet says:

          Leeuwin.

          Perth is variations on hick. Perth THEN ate river Cobbler and called Bluebait a Mulie. Perth NOW calls them Freo Sardines and has a festival for them. Blessing of the Mulies. Value-added hick.

          Perth THEN avoided weird smelling Continental stores. Perth NOW buys Bacalhau dried cod to take home and reinflate. Eurohick.

          NY has the Statue of Liberty. Heavy stuff. Perth will have a Wagyl/BMX track pedestrian bridge sur Swan. Creative hick. There’ll be No Fishing signs, threats of fines, and recalcitrant lines as the moon shines. No Cobbler left to catch but.

          Like

  9. BSWAM says:

    Here a bit late, but Bronx Pizza is what happens when a drunk on the 242nd Street elevated station platform leans too far over the railing to puke.

    “East Village is a neighbourhood borough of Manhattan near Greenwich Village in NYC.”

    Rather liking “neighborhood borough”, myself. Bit like saying “I live in a big house home”.

    “It is famous for its diverse community and vibrant nightlife.”

    No shit.

    “Our East Village is haven in the heart of Railway Lane (off Murray Street Mall) with an open kitchen and speak easy dining area.”

    I am fairly certain this was translated into English from the Japanese by a person who doesn’t actually speak either.

    The food looks great, although I’m not sure the Full English Breakfast is something New Yorkers eat frequently (or at least no more frequently than Bronx pizza).

    Like

  10. Zuben says:

    Actually isn’t most east village food comidas criollos y chinas ?

    Like

We can handle the worst

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s