Special donks

A car has to be a special breed of cat to make the cut these days, as it appears every second idiot has made some kind of moronic modification to either car or licence plate. So here is special from Brad C. How many vents does this mother need? Is that Alannah McTiernan driving this Magna? The roof vent looks poorly glued on. Apparently the sides are even worse. And Bento found the ultimate TWOP wagon. All Dubstep and ALL Gemini. TWOP fans are the most Dubstepping Gemini people in the world, and I love youse for it.

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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95 Responses to Special donks

  1. Snuff says:

    That is Bruce McAvaney special, TLA.

    And well spotted, Bento. Gemini. Dubstep. Dockers.


  2. Rolly says:

    Wocheronabowt, Eh??

    Pretentious Rules. OK.


  3. Grrr says:

    I have it on good authority that DJ Bax favours called drum’n’bass.
    I have dreams of this becoming a West Side Story style turf war, with duelling iPhones, and Morris Dancing.

    (And apparently Apple Inc logo stickers are legal on numberplates).


    • Snuff says:

      Morris dancing, Grrr ? Shovel it into corners, race it over potholes, it can’t bounce, can’t roll, can’t pitch.


      • Grrr says:

        Morris Dancing:

        The original street dance.


      • Bag O'Turnips says:

        Thanks for the Morris hyperlink…typical British Leyland of that era: some truly advanced ideas we now take for granted, yet completely marred by lamentable assembly quality.

        When the Japanese and German cars began to be renowned for their sturdiness during the 1970s, the writing was on the wall for British automotive manufacturers. Once they began to incorporate the modern technologies often pioneered in these BMC vehicles—such as FWD in the Mini, tall-and-wide and flat-floored body in the Morris 1100, aluminium bodies of Range Rovers and the very high level of safety features in the Jaguar Series 1 XJ6—by the time the 80s arrived, it was game over.

        A lot of fundamental problems that were in existence in the UK at that time (such as the winding down of industry and subsequent nationalisation, decolonisation removing traditional export markets, the “brain drain”, the energy crises, and a hostile industrial relations atmosphere, i.e. strikes) contributed to the woeful build quality that plagued most British cars, especially the British Leyland-associated makers. Even the prestigious marques under that umbrella, such as Jaguar, Rover and Triumph, all suffered too.


  4. WAtching says:

    Things seem to be getting worser and worser…

    Read the Slimes yesterday for the first time in ages. Nothing about Aung San Suu Kyi but 5 pages about the Ben Cousins saga. Tuined my breakfast.


  5. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    Can a Mitsubishi driver ever be ironic?


  6. Pete says:

    That Town of Vincent tweet will be picked up by the West as investigative jerbalism. Probably not till Thursday though.

    I’d believe it.

    Does that mean Freo hire Crunchy Granola folk for the same purpose? Better than parading Adele around I suppose.


  7. Bag O'Turnips says:

    A late entry, but I must state that that indigo colour, known as Ultra Blue in GMH-speak, looks rather splendid on what appears to be a 1978-1980 TD Gemini, with the number plate located on the rear deck, as the first two models were the 1975 TX and the emission-controlled TC of 1976 had it below the bumper. I’ve always liked that colour, recalling it from when I was a young boy at at time when Geminis and Toranas (on which this colour was used; Kingswoods/Statesmans didn’t have it) were still plentiful on Perth’s roads and carparks.

    This however was a 1976-77 colour, discontinued when the TD Gemini and UC Toranas were released in 1978, so perhaps this Gem has either had a colour change, or has had the old rear deck appliques removed and relocated higher up. Popular as they were amongst young folks back in the 80s and early 90s for hotting up (they responded well to tuning and suspension tweaks to an already competent package),
    I somewhat prefer original, unmolested examples. They and the Ford Escorts were the best combination of economy, easy serviceability and fun dynamics for their day, as well as having neat and restrained European designs.

    Dub Step? Oh, I forgot to notice…


  8. Nigel says:

    I Personally know DJ Bax in the magna. Apart from his wonderful car, he xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx. Enough said


  9. Rolly says:

    I’m still a bit puzzled over the concept of a Gemini fan club.
    Bond MiniCars, Messerschmitt and Heinkel bubble cars, NSU Prinzes, Goggomobiles and Lightburn Zetas I can understand, if only for their eccentricities.
    The Geminis had/have absolutely no redeeming features except, perhaps, the dubious honour of being the world’s least exciting and innovative car ever.
    The General’s answer to the Morris Marina – twenty years after the fact.


    • Dude! What about the Sandpiper? A Gemini with err Sandpipers on it.


      • Rolly says:

        Complete with a retro 1960s Chrysler Corporation colour scheme!
        My parents had a 1968 Hillman Minx in this ‘livery’.
        Not a bad wagon for the British environment.


      • Rolly says:

        Sandpiper, though?
        Nah! Sandpaper (all-along a-same pronunciation in Western Melbourne), ‘cos it was so rough.


      • orbea says:

        Is there a Camira Owners Club? The fact that after 40k the standard service was a complete top-end rebuild, difficult to believe the J-car was the believed to be the saviour of the Oz car industry. Wheels named it the car of the year in 1982. Most were blowing blue smoke by 1983


    • The Lazy Aussie's Stalker says:

      How wrong you are . The 1975 Holden Gemini was the Wheels Magazine Australian Car of the year and pulled Holden out of the red with huge sales success , Without the Gemini , Holden would have gone the way of Nissan and more recently Mitsubishis manufacturing concerns .. Holden Geminis were the last of the rear wheel drive 4 cylinder Holdens , all car makers went the cheaper option of frontwheel drive configuration , and thus the mundane world of small cars was created .. Everybody (except Rolly) knows a Gemini can be made to out handle and accelerate most cars on the road .. Infact a bloke over east owns the Fastest Gemini In the world (yes they were sold in evrery country) running the 4oom in 8.74sec at 243kph , He does this with a Modified 1.8L Isuzu Gemini motor and standard typ Gemini Differential ..
      Try that with your Marina or gogomobile , no comparison Rolly ..


      • Rolly says:

        A modified car is modified, you dumb shit.
        It’s not the crap that the factories produced.
        Try equating the Ford Escort RS series ex-factory, to the highly strengthened and hotted up race/rally cars that won all the acclaim. Chalk and cheese.
        Wheels Magazine has always written what their advertisers wanted and were rarely taken seriously by anyone with any practical knowledge.
        Incidentally I was service crew to the WA amateur rally champion in the mid/late ’70s, which he achieved in a Datsun 1600. (Now there is a car that really handled well.)
        When he went the way of other marques, his success rate dropped significantly.
        You are right out of your depth on this issue, mate.


      • Bento says:

        Wheels Magazine Car of the Year 1975, you say?

        Hmm, I wonder which car won in 1973?

        Undermines the credibility somewhat.

        But all this car arguing is tedious in the extreme. Shaun and Friends, you need to stop whining. I took the pic, and I like the car. If I still had my mighty 1969 Datsun 1000 Sports, it could well be that colour by now. It was a simple in-joke about dubstep, and you’ve gone and made yourself look like a bunch of loosers.


  10. Rolly says:

    For all the concern about these vehicles, I’d have to be a a bit concerned for my safety in this Passat:


  11. The Legend 101 says:

    Late November 2010 the realse of nission micra it was like a frog. The pink ones look the worst take a look for yourself just type nission micra in google images.


  12. Andrew says:

    Whats wrong with the Gemini? How is this “worse of perth” You’ve failed me as human being and you should delete yourself from existence.


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  14. Bell says:

    seriously nothing wrong with the gemi.. who evers the one whos got no time to actually take note and photos on actuall disgracful cars i.e one above the gemini, get a life ey!! oh and next time maybe blur out the number plate cause if that was my car i would be pissed big time!!


  15. Natalia Fan #1 says:

    This whole post is for me becoming reminiscent of the eighth level of Hell, wherein sinners are forced to watch endless repeats of Top Gear. No one deserves that.


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  17. Dylz says:

    I have seen the DJ Bax car around the place… Saw it the other day and it has had the boot and bonnet changed to standard black panels.. Not sure if he is going for the rice burner style carbon fibre bogan look or if he had to replace the two for a crash or whatever but it still looks like the worst car ever… and the haircut… geez… that deserves it’s own page all together…


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