Strange Fruit

Applecross trees bear strange fruit,
vinyl on the leaves and pvc at the root,
plastic bodies swinging in the southern breeze,
Strange fruit hanging from the Jacaranda trees.

Here is fruit for the crows to pluck,
For the rain to gather, for the wind to suck,
For the sun to rot, for the trees to drop,
Here is a strange and bitter crop.

By Nicko. Canning Highway Applecross.

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
This entry was posted in Uncategorisable Worsts and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

60 Responses to Strange Fruit

  1. Snuff says:

    Woah ! There may be something to that Highway to Hell urban myth, after all.

    Like

  2. Stu says:

    clearly this doll has failed to please it’s owners

    “They just don’t make em as tight as they used to”

    Like

  3. skink says:

    more entertainment from our favourite Russian cashed-up bogans:

    http://www.perthnow.com.au/entertainment/perth-confidential/th-birthday-surprise-for-perth-millionaire-zhenya-tsvetnenko/story-e6frg30l-1225846438381

    ice sculptures of his Ferrari, his face on a hundred dollar bill, and a big tent lined with palm trees

    Cocos?

    they are planning a Halloween Party that looks like being another bad taste bonanza.

    It’s at Fremantle Prison. Lock ’em in and throw away the key

    Like

    • orbea says:

      then burn the muthafukka down

      Like

    • Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

      I tried to make an ice sculpture of my car once but couldn’t fit into the freezer and all the Paddle Pops started to melt. Props to our new found Russian friends. Looks like the ball is in Bree & Malcolm’s court (shudder).

      Like

    • Natalia Fan #1 says:

      I’m vomiting in my mouth. Even bad taste would be better than the no-taste horrors suggested by the PN article.

      Like

    • shazza says:

      A birthday cake of $100 with his face? Move over Bree, there’s a new kind a classy in town.

      Like

    • Bill O'Slatter says:

      Comment 34 is apt. Idiot is , of course, code for young person. ‘Onya Tshitvies!

      Like

    • Natalia Fan #1 says:

      Good to see all of the Tsvetnenkos’ mates defending these paragons of good taste in the comments on the PN story. Are they deluded enough to think sane people are jealous of their tacky z-lister status? Clearly so:

      “Obviously all you jealous, bitter losers that sit on this forum and post these negative comments have no life and would never have the chance to go to such a lavish event cause firstly you would have no friends who would invite you and secondly you would be to poor to buy a decent present. You would rather read bad news than congratulate someone’s succeses. You are very basic human beings. lydia you are the classy Paris of perth and anyone that says anything different cant look in the mirror them selves cause they are dog ugly. Thanks for the invite guys, we had a great night and cant wait to read about the next one in the paper….”

      Like

      • Natalia Fan #1 says:

        Correct me if I’m wrong , but the above represents a case study in clinical narcissism.

        Like

      • Bill O'Slatter says:

        They’re takin the piss, NF#2

        Like

      • Stu says:

        oh but this from the comments also – brilliant

        …” The goverment in Africa needs to look after its own people rather than just themselves and if you live in Australia and are poor thats because you either had too many kids or you spend it on wants rather than needs because our goverment uses our tax dollars to pay for food and housing for those that can’t or don’t want to work.”

        Like

      • greggo says:

        I don’t usually get innvolved in this side of Worst’s activities but some of you cunts need to back the fuck off from the Tachenkos’ case. For a start it’s totally impossible to make that much money on some dotcom rubblish. He must be leveraged to the eyeballs. Where did the money for that come from? Did you ever wash five bucks in your trousers? Five hundred million? Why is his house in Canning Vale? (indeed, why does he have parties in Freo jail?) Because it’s not too far for the missus to visit, that’s why. He’s a gentleman and that will always go down with a Perth judge very well.

        Like

    • alexei gregorov says:

      These guys are the ultimate Cashed Up Bogans, aren’t they? Kind of makes me glad to be poor when I see that having truckloads of $$$ doesn’t make for class.

      Like

  4. Bento says:

    We shouldn’t antagonise them. This action will endanger bucks throughout the state.

    Like

  5. orbea says:

    Have the B&S bumpkins moved on from sheep?

    Like

  6. skink says:

    and in the most shameless piece of product placement and casual-wear-for-comment seen for some time, our favourite ligger Shallow Spice has asked her readership to offer their opinion on a series of outfits she has been wearing during Fashion Week.

    all week our intrepid freeloader has been attending parties wearing clothes given her by local seamstresses and frock shops, and has been plugging their brands in return.

    rather bravely, she has asked people to comment on her outfits on her blog. Feel free to join in the baiting, although very little seems to get past her moderator:

    http://www.watoday.com.au/lifestyle/lifematters/blogs/pep-talk/rate-my-outfit/20100909-152bw.html

    Like

  7. orbea says:

    Dear Papa Freud,
    Help me through this bad patch I seem to be having.

    Like

  8. greggo says:

    Look, Applecross has always been a sort of gate to western civilisation suburb, the front line (at Canning Bridge, Perth’s checkpoint charlie) facing the down at heel south and the east. That role has never been easy for Applecrossians, the shy Mt Pleasants and the reason why the small nation of Heathcote is tucked away there just out of small arms’ range from drive bys on the Kwinana fwy. In this case, I would say given the muscular and fit form of the hanged piece of well sub-semiotic analysis quite frankly, somebody has thrown in the towel in terms of the 5x week gym visits, endless pilates, stretching classes, weekend lower bowel irrigation retreats etc etc needed to present oneself as modern and progressive and not some fucking beer-gutted hoon from Wilson. Obviously some therapy is in order here and I note the state member for a related area was/is a member of the SAS or SS or something, so that’s probably underway now.

    Like

    • orbea says:

      Possibly greggo’s best post. I am still chuckling over the thought of Nanny Woollard being an ex-member of the SAS, even though greggo is referring to Tinley.
      If Mount Pleasant is shy, Brentwood has been locked in a Belgian dungeon ever since the Freeway crossed the Canning.

      Like

      • shazza says:

        Yes agreed, if TLA had ‘like’ buttons I might just have clicked it this time.

        Like

      • greggo says:

        You’re talking about:

        Dr Janet May Woollard MLA RN, BAppSc, MEd, PhD, LLB, JP

        Is this thing hanging outside her house? I have the feeling she might be about at the end of her tether with empty credentialism. Exactly what I was talking about and exactly the sort of person who would wreck house prices over the Canning bridge!

        Like

  9. Pingback: The Willagee Horror | The Worst of Perth

  10. The Legend 101 says:

    I dont think thats a fruit its a fake body hanging from a backyard tree and the person who put it there is an IDIOT!.

    Like

  11. Terangeree says:

    The 101 Legend, apparently, has never heard of 20th-century American music and Billie Holliday.

    Like

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