Applecross trees bear strange fruit,
vinyl on the leaves and pvc at the root,
plastic bodies swinging in the southern breeze,
Strange fruit hanging from the Jacaranda trees.
Here is fruit for the crows to pluck,
For the rain to gather, for the wind to suck,
For the sun to rot, for the trees to drop,
Here is a strange and bitter crop.
By Nicko. Canning Highway Applecross.
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The Asia Beat
The Worst of Perth 
Woah ! There may be something to that Highway to Hell urban myth, after all.
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That’s one freaky scene man. Terrifying.
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Which ‘end’ is Hell?
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it’s the little touches:
someone has put a pair of jocks on it to protect its modesty, and is that some duct tape patching the thigh? Don’t they know you’re not supposed to give them love bites?
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I think it is very likely that the “author” of this work will see this post and I hope explain.
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Damn you, skink. Now you’ve reminded me of a dreadful old joke which I’ll spare you all, except to say that the punchline was, “I dunno. She farted and jumped outta the window.”
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clearly this doll has failed to please it’s owners
“They just don’t make em as tight as they used to”
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more entertainment from our favourite Russian cashed-up bogans:
http://www.perthnow.com.au/entertainment/perth-confidential/th-birthday-surprise-for-perth-millionaire-zhenya-tsvetnenko/story-e6frg30l-1225846438381
ice sculptures of his Ferrari, his face on a hundred dollar bill, and a big tent lined with palm trees
Cocos?
they are planning a Halloween Party that looks like being another bad taste bonanza.
It’s at Fremantle Prison. Lock ’em in and throw away the key
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then burn the muthafukka down
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I tried to make an ice sculpture of my car once but couldn’t fit into the freezer and all the Paddle Pops started to melt. Props to our new found Russian friends. Looks like the ball is in Bree & Malcolm’s court (shudder).
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I’m vomiting in my mouth. Even bad taste would be better than the no-taste horrors suggested by the PN article.
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A birthday cake of $100 with his face? Move over Bree, there’s a new kind a classy in town.
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Comment 34 is apt. Idiot is , of course, code for young person. ‘Onya Tshitvies!
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Are you an old cunt today Bill?
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It doesn’t happen overnight.
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Good to see all of the Tsvetnenkos’ mates defending these paragons of good taste in the comments on the PN story. Are they deluded enough to think sane people are jealous of their tacky z-lister status? Clearly so:
“Obviously all you jealous, bitter losers that sit on this forum and post these negative comments have no life and would never have the chance to go to such a lavish event cause firstly you would have no friends who would invite you and secondly you would be to poor to buy a decent present. You would rather read bad news than congratulate someone’s succeses. You are very basic human beings. lydia you are the classy Paris of perth and anyone that says anything different cant look in the mirror them selves cause they are dog ugly. Thanks for the invite guys, we had a great night and cant wait to read about the next one in the paper….”
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Correct me if I’m wrong , but the above represents a case study in clinical narcissism.
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They’re takin the piss, NF#2
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oh but this from the comments also – brilliant
…” The goverment in Africa needs to look after its own people rather than just themselves and if you live in Australia and are poor thats because you either had too many kids or you spend it on wants rather than needs because our goverment uses our tax dollars to pay for food and housing for those that can’t or don’t want to work.”
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I don’t usually get innvolved in this side of Worst’s activities but some of you cunts need to back the fuck off from the Tachenkos’ case. For a start it’s totally impossible to make that much money on some dotcom rubblish. He must be leveraged to the eyeballs. Where did the money for that come from? Did you ever wash five bucks in your trousers? Five hundred million? Why is his house in Canning Vale? (indeed, why does he have parties in Freo jail?) Because it’s not too far for the missus to visit, that’s why. He’s a gentleman and that will always go down with a Perth judge very well.
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These guys are the ultimate Cashed Up Bogans, aren’t they? Kind of makes me glad to be poor when I see that having truckloads of $$$ doesn’t make for class.
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We shouldn’t antagonise them. This action will endanger bucks throughout the state.
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Have the B&S bumpkins moved on from sheep?
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Are they ginormous Man Boobs?
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Does Julia play cricket?
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and in the most shameless piece of product placement and casual-wear-for-comment seen for some time, our favourite ligger Shallow Spice has asked her readership to offer their opinion on a series of outfits she has been wearing during Fashion Week.
all week our intrepid freeloader has been attending parties wearing clothes given her by local seamstresses and frock shops, and has been plugging their brands in return.
rather bravely, she has asked people to comment on her outfits on her blog. Feel free to join in the baiting, although very little seems to get past her moderator:
http://www.watoday.com.au/lifestyle/lifematters/blogs/pep-talk/rate-my-outfit/20100909-152bw.html
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Daile, who cut your hair? Barnaby Joyce?
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She wore $3k worth of clothes to five events? And not once did she wear underwear – saucy!
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I saw that last week. How fucking self indulgent. Who gives a shit?
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I did like Daniel Hatch’s catwalk coverage in the West though. Particularly that “Summer is set to sizzle…”
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“The Perth Fashion Festival is celebrating the phenomenon with a special runway show, featuring street fashion inspired by some of Perth’s most popular websites.”
I think my mind may have just boggled, TLA.
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‘Bunbury of the North’ tee, City of Perth cufflinks, mismatched socks, Bonds undies, Emo Simpkins pants, topped with a felt hat?
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Where do you hang the cufflinks while wearing a tshirt?
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from your nipple piercings.
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Oh man, how could they leave TWoP out of that loop? If Bento is setting metrocentric trends all over the arrondisement, or DFOC bringing sexy back with groooovy ties sans shoes, me with my hemp fishermans pants (very retro don’t you know) and you TLA with your fancy suits…. well.
And Patti is a massive fan so the fashionistas must be beating a path.
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And I do have 40 posts on fashion, including this magnificent one from you Shazza.
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And this FFS
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And then there’s todays post.
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If we get invites to Perth Fashion Festival, I will wear that outfit. Promise.
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“of people are reading Perth blogger Jessie’s thoughts on the fashion scene.”
hundreds?
with that much traffic she needs a social media consultant
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Yes, hundreds. You might as well say several, or even a smattering. About the same number as at the curtin protest.
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I like that someone posting pics of their shirt gets more comments than Sattler ever did.
But significantly fewer than a pic of 2 poles.
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I’m getting a lot of referrals from sensibleerection.com/entry.php/81670 . The work computer refused to even think about opening it.
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sensibel erection?
clearly just health and safety advice for the construction industry
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Rate my what?!
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I see NF#1 made it past the mods, and even shoehorned pedos and boatpeople in there. Nice work.
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indeed, outstanding work NF#1
criticism of their advertorial policy does not get past their moderator but crackpot lunacy does, especially if it is slagging off the government.
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Was hoping for a personal response from Daile, alas. Maybe next time.
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Dear Papa Freud,
Help me through this bad patch I seem to be having.
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speaking of pricks…
the best name for Wilson Tuckey’s blog I have seen suggested so far has been:
the Wilson Tuckey Files, or WTF
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My favourite was Tuckwit
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Look, Applecross has always been a sort of gate to western civilisation suburb, the front line (at Canning Bridge, Perth’s checkpoint charlie) facing the down at heel south and the east. That role has never been easy for Applecrossians, the shy Mt Pleasants and the reason why the small nation of Heathcote is tucked away there just out of small arms’ range from drive bys on the Kwinana fwy. In this case, I would say given the muscular and fit form of the hanged piece of well sub-semiotic analysis quite frankly, somebody has thrown in the towel in terms of the 5x week gym visits, endless pilates, stretching classes, weekend lower bowel irrigation retreats etc etc needed to present oneself as modern and progressive and not some fucking beer-gutted hoon from Wilson. Obviously some therapy is in order here and I note the state member for a related area was/is a member of the SAS or SS or something, so that’s probably underway now.
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Possibly greggo’s best post. I am still chuckling over the thought of Nanny Woollard being an ex-member of the SAS, even though greggo is referring to Tinley.
If Mount Pleasant is shy, Brentwood has been locked in a Belgian dungeon ever since the Freeway crossed the Canning.
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Yes agreed, if TLA had ‘like’ buttons I might just have clicked it this time.
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You’re talking about:
Dr Janet May Woollard MLA RN, BAppSc, MEd, PhD, LLB, JP
Is this thing hanging outside her house? I have the feeling she might be about at the end of her tether with empty credentialism. Exactly what I was talking about and exactly the sort of person who would wreck house prices over the Canning bridge!
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I dont think thats a fruit its a fake body hanging from a backyard tree and the person who put it there is an IDIOT!.
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The 101 Legend, apparently, has never heard of 20th-century American music and Billie Holliday.
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are you new here are you American?,Welcome to u
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