Jesus Jockeys

This from Garry. Seen in Fremantle. Looks like they’ve got John Singleton in to do their marketing. Awful sign. One last one for Easter.

Talking about Jesus jockeys, I saw this plate in a shop. The building is still there in Beaufort Street. All very worthy, but wouldn’t a building in this position be better put to use as an instant print shop, or one of Chas Hopkin’s office furniture outlets? The plate looks nice. Lose the Lord and something might still be made of the place.

Nail some sense into him...

Nail some sense into him...

pass the plate

pass the plate


About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
This entry was posted in worst advertising, worst church, worst sign. Bookmark the permalink.

40 Responses to Jesus Jockeys

  1. Grrr says:

    Unless I’m mistaken that building is the old Bridge Theatre, isn’t it?

    I know it’s one of those Metro superchurches now, but was it really church in the 1960s as the plate suggests?

    It never struck me as a church-style of building, the lack of cross being really obvious for a start.


    • Snuff says:

      I always thought the crosses, albeit elongated, were built into that tall south western part of the building, Grrr, and as Kwality mentioned below, it wasn’t a bad op shop in its day.

      JC seems to have lost a bit of condition since 99. Fortunately, I always have my this to tell me “No!”, should I ever have any impure thoughts.


    • Frank Calabrese says:

      Yep, and home of CTV Perth until we were forced to move to enable this mobe to renovate it as a church. It was a bugger for Wheelchair access – you had to enter via the basement to use the lift, or weave your way through all the old audio gear in the neighbouring door who to get to the same lift.

      Funniest memory was a CTV Xmas party where a young chap who was later one of the main production people at Access 31 had just turned 18 and he was as drunk as anything and was virtually bouncing off the walls.


  2. Kwality says:

    In the early 90’s it was a church admin building, with the hall being used as an op-shop. Then it became the Bridge theatre (saw Billy Bragg there in fine fettle), now back to being a church.


  3. Groucho says:

    Does the poster suggest that this guy cannot participate in the Easter egg hunt, hence more for you ?


  4. skink says:

    the son of god appears to be throwing up into a wheelie bin.

    I have done that.

    now I know that he understands my pain.


    • Bento says:

      Or is He looking for Easter eggs?


    • shazza says:

      Thats no wheelie bin, that’s a street rubbish bin (look closer) I can’t beleive you would be so crass as to suggest Jesus would vomit into a street bin in clear view of passersby. He is very obviously puking into the bushes in a subtle, son-of-god like way.


    • Bento says:

      I can’t believe I missed the opportunity to say ‘good riddance’ to the Son of God. That’s like the holy grail of bad taste gags.

      Thanks, I’ll be here all week. Try the body of Christ.


  5. Xab says:

    I saw that Christ billboard this morning and almost fell of my scooter laughing… nice catch… I’ve got a bad phone-camera shot of a previous billboard at the same church that has the back of an emo kid who has ‘In heaven even scars on the inside heal’ scrawled across it in marker pen… but it could be worse, such as here:


    • metao says:

      I saw the Jesus one this morning as well – I didn’t even process it until I was two steps past it and if I wasn’t late I would have gone back and taken a piccie for the TLA. Luckily, friend Garry had it covered.


  6. David Cohen says:

    Are the hands a little…oversized?

    And has the cross been made from those pine logs that fence parks and reserves?


    • Groucho says:

      Its the angle of the dangle that makes the hands look oversized I am sure.

      I will not comment on the holy wheelie bin…..


    • Hovean says:

      Something is being put in the christian’s water – they seem to be evolving large hands. Damm evolutionists, or muslims, or plasterers – could making it easier to crucify be a bit underhand?


  7. Johnny Nonation says:

    The poster is a ‘disastrous’ rip off of Salvador Dali’s St John of the Cross – hanging up in umh, Scotland these days. Dali’s painting was attacked by a maniac. There’s still time to attack this one with that rubbish bin.


  8. skink says:

    I attended my kid’s school Easter Parade, during which several children were invited to read out their essay “What Easter means to me.”

    one little girl told us:

    “Easter means having a good time with my family, getting together for lunch and sharing Easter eggs. But it is not just about chocolate, because two days ago I found out that Jesus died on the cross for our sins.”


  9. Ljuke says:

    In other news, I went to Mandurah the other day and did not see one worthy worst. What has the world come to? What fresh hell?


  10. drum says:

    Does anybody remember quasar used to be next door to the metro church. never went in but we used to skateboard on the slab banks.


  11. Cimbali says:

    I met a guy today who shares weird and wonderful religious presents with a friend – I told him to check out TWOP and am very glad to see a religious post right on cue.
    I am writing this in the hope he will see it and be inspired to send a photograph of his “jesus cube” which he told me unfolds in many different ways to show various aspects of the life of Christ. I sent him off to check out the bibleopoly game for sale at the local religious book shop.


  12. Cimbali says:

    Oh and by the way if you are the jesus cube guy, the website which I couldn’t remember the name of (which sells fantastically weird religious things like the game which allows you to become the pope), is called Ship of Fools.


  13. Rachel says:

    Cmon TLA!!
    You have to do more “worst brothel” pics!!!!


  14. Vic Demised says:

    The plate is instantly recognisable to we cognoscenti as Wembley Ware, and a particularly fine example of their local souvenir kitsch, too.

    drum, I think you’ll find Quasar was actually a few doors down, past the back door of Pilpel Printworks, in the little hall with an escutcheon of William of Orange above the door. I used to rehearse there with community theatre and cabaret-type groups during the early 80s, until we got kicked out so they could install the Quasar thingy.


  15. Yes it was a music venue. Can’t remember what it was called. Snuff?


  16. Vic Demised says:

    Of course, the Equator. Snuff, you encyclopedia of Perth’s popular culture!


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