Pump The Stump. Election 08

Carp Pic Barn Pic
First three worst contenders. McGowan Lab. O'brien Lib. and Sullivan for Invisibility and stupidity .com AKA Family Fist.

First three worst contenders. McGowan Lab. O'brien Lib. and Sullivan for Invisibility and stupidity .com AKA Family Fist.

3 more worsts. Carps, washed out or washed up? Matt loves Colin

3 more worsts. Carps, washed out or washed up? Matt loves Colin

After whingeing, here is another election hopeful’s shot, the extraordinary Albert Jacob sent by Poor Lisa, or was it another Lisa? Could he get a role in The League of Gentlemen?

I want your business and am prepared to pay for it

I want your business and am prepared to pay for it

Here’s another shot from Teh Albert’s website… OK I cropped it. Just making the point that Colin Barnett needs all the arses like this he can get. The liberal demographic wouldn’t usually run to this sort of backside. More like the Paul Murray “Asian Elephant” style. Kudos Albert to get this level of backside on board.

Vote Albert jacob

Vote Albert Jacob

The full shot. Jeez why did I bother?

So, where would I go to get my roots done Albert? Currambine. Are you fucking insane?

So, where would I go to get my roots done Albert? Currambine. Are you fucking insane?

Here you can park your worst of election 08. Colin’s Far Canal to Carps’ Burkean Conflict. I’ll add pictures of the worsters as they come up. Particularly the also ran types everyone might not be so familiar with their incompetence.

Is that Noel chriton Browne?

Is that Noel chriton Browne?

Do people actually care about Burke these days? Libs Ad from Frank.

More like tool shed.

More like tool shed.

Another good one from Frank. The Libs tool shed.

And another odd looker via Teh ‘Rage. If you’re going beard, add some arses Peter. Is he trying to look like a Chinese Wombat? Libs in Guildford.

Working hard to appear in your nightmares in the Basso area.

Working hard to appear in your nightmares in the Basso area.

Martin Whitely ALP for Bassendean is no oil painting. Cthulhu like lips. For some reason appears on a scientologist website.

About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
This entry was posted in worst of perth. Bookmark the permalink.

196 Responses to Pump The Stump. Election 08

  1. Frank Calabrese says:

    Well TWAT are really hanging shit on Barnett with 2 opinion pieces today, one by the Bedwetter, and one General article sourced from AAP.

    The Bedwetter.


    And the general AAP Article.



  2. BrownBook says:

    Hey, remember that time when WA Family First dot com launched? Don’t blame you if you don’t.

    So far, no fun to be had in their exciting online democratic space.



  3. Frank Calabrese says:

    HAs anyone noticed that when Colin announced his “War Team” that there was no sign of Troy “Money Sniffer” Buswell ?


  4. I though he was supposed to be treasurer?


  5. Frank Calabrese says:

    [I though he was supposed to be treasurer?]

    He is, hence “Money Sniffer” :-)


  6. Oh, I thought you meant he’d been left out.


  7. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Oh, I thought you meant he’d been left out.]

    I should’ve clarifed he was left out of the photoshoot when he announced the foot soldiers to the assembled cheer squad, I mean media. :-)


  8. It’s a bit hard to hide the treasurer for a campaign though. He’ll have to come out sometime.


  9. Frank Calabrese says:

    According to an Interview, to be screened on Stateline tonight, The Canal is dead and buried.


  10. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the official word :-)

    [The leader of the Opposition in WA has dumped a controversial idea to build a pipeline to carry water from the Kimberley to Perth.

    Colin Barnett told ABC Stateline the idea was a mistake and that the last State election was basically a referendum on whether it should be built.

    Mr Barnett said the Liberal Party is planning to release its water policy soon but plans for a canal are dead in the water.

    “In that document when the water policy comes out it will not include a canal,” he said. ]



  11. skink says:

    the ABC website says the canal is ‘dead in the water’

    everyone is joining in


  12. Who has been Carps’ worst performer? Apart from the sacked ones. McGowan?


  13. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Who has been Carps’ worst performer? Apart from the sacked ones. McGowan?]

    I’ll declare myself as a paid up member of the ALP, but indeed you are correct about McGowan being the worst Minister, not helped by trying to sell the OBE, expecially being subject to a campaign by PLATO, aided and abetted by The West’s Bethany Hiatt being the wife of one of the members of PLATO.


  14. Midlandia says:

    Fellow ALP member here, as long as Mr. Calabrese is coming out of the closet. I’d probably suggest that McGowan’s been a poor performer as well. The drawn out struggle over teacher’s pay created an aura of malcontent which was neither desirable or pleasant. Of course, The West seized upon this, despite the fact that their party of choice wouldn’t so much as break wind in the direction of the state’s educators.

    Speaking of the West, I swear to God Paul Armstrong has a dartboard in his office with Jim McGinty’s picture on it. Ten points if you get him in the eyes!


  15. Frank Calabrese says:

    From the PollBludger Archives of the 2005 State Election involving Teh Paul of Teh Nurries :-)

    [Perth talk radio host and former West Australian editor Paul Murray tells erstwhile sparring partner Peter Brent of Mumble that he sees six seats as likely Liberal gains and six more as possibilities, with the most likely outcome being a minority Coalition government.]


    And this on election Eve.

    [Brian Burke and Noel Crichton-Browne appeared on Paul Murray’s 6PR program this morning discussing the state of play in important marginal seats. On balance, Burke expects a narrow win for Labor, Crichton-Browne a narrow win for the Coalition, and Murray stands by his assessment of a minority Coalition government.]


    And yet he has the hide to bag Burkie when in fact he relied on his expertise for his radio show.

    What a Fucking Hypocrite :-)


  16. Frank Calabrese says:

    Cheeck out the studio chatter during the ad break between Jim Waley & Graham Richardson discussing the results of the 1989 State Election.



  17. Cookster says:

    Keep an eye on Killer Kobelke I say. Police. Water. Concrete boots. Canal.


  18. ratbag23 says:

    Those quotes from Paul Murray during the 2005 State election remind me of his performances on-air around that time.

    On the Friday, the eve of the election, he opened his morning show with a lengthy tirade against the Gallop Labor government. Then on the following Monday morning, after the shock loss by the Coalition (despite his best efforts), he launched into another, even more bitter spray.

    Strangely enough, if you didn’t know better, you would’ve thought that you were listening to a petulant little man with a bruised ego. His main point, which he beat to death, was that he insisted that the Labor Party’s win was “undeserved”. That’s right, that they didn’t *deserve* to get back in to office. And I guess, by association, he was implying that the masses of people who had voted Labor were ignorant fools, or just plain evil or something.


  19. CK says:

    Oh geez. That FF site is a bit of an embarrassment. I think somebody must have exploded their internet.


  20. Pingback: Weekend Worstoff 18 « The Worst of Perth

  21. Apart from the major plonkers (it’s hard to go past Troy), I think Simon O’brien gets my worst vote. Not responding to TWOP, and wearing that hair with that mo. he also comes across as an idiot on the few times he’s been spotted. I suppose you can’t be that bright if you look in the mirror, see that and still go out in public. What can we expect for the foreshore if that’s how he likes his bonce?


  22. Frank Calabrese says:

    And Colin is backpedalling on Deregulated Retail Trading Hours despite what was written in The West :-)


    Has he had a phone call from John Cummins ?


  23. Frank Calabrese says:

    From SeanofPerth over at Pollbludger.

    [Another article coming out 2mw as well showing a letter form the sniffer victim to Buswell last december. Has her saying she supports him and that he needs to go on etc. Says she began to really hate him when he started denying the incident early this year, Full of quotes from pathetic Liberals saying it proves Buswell is perfect, a saint and a larrakin and that all sexual assault victims are liars and whores]


    That will really portray the Libs as Sensitive New Age Guys – NOT


  24. CK says:

    I have clearly missed something about WA and deregulated trading hours.

    Why TF do we have inane parochial pompous insanities such as ‘registered lawns’ and still can’t go to the shops on Sundays?

    Oh wait. Have just answered own question.


  25. Frank Calabrese says:

    [I have clearly missed something about WA and deregulated trading hours. ]

    CK, perhaps this Perth Now article may explain Carp’s so-called backflip as well as Colin’s.

    [Mr Carpenter also signalled a major U-turn on another key election issue — trading hours.

    Premier shifts on Sunday trading

    He said he wanted to open more tourism precincts in Perth rather than allow shops in Perth to open whenever they wanted on Sundays.

    The precincts allow seven-day trading in selected areas.

    Mr Carpenter said he wanted to respect the 2005 referendum in which West Australians had voted no to Sunday trading.

    Country towns would not be affected by changes to retail trading laws. Their local councils would still decide whether to allow Sunday shopping.

    The Liberals have also promised to extend weekday shopping hours and fix some anomalies.
    Both Liberal and Labor parties are skirting around the vexed issue of Sunday trading.

    Just eight months ago, the Premier said he wanted full deregulation. He said he believed the referendum result would not be relevant at the next state election.

    “Our commitment was that, given the outcome of the referendum, we wouldn’t try to do it (deregulate shopping hours) again until the next election,” Mr Carpenter said last December.

    “My intention is that at the state election we will have deregulated trading hours as our policy position.”

    But yesterday Mr Carpenter was saying something different.

    “There was a clear indication at the last referendum that there wasn’t overwhelming support for total deregulation, but I believe that there is very strong support for extended shopping hours, more precincts and more stores available and open on Sundays,” he said.

    “I accept that total deregulation is not wanted by the majority of people in WA.

    “I’d like to see more precincts. I also believe that the restriction we have got on furniture stores and whitegoods retailers now needs to change.

    “It doesn’t make sense that on weekends you can only go to Bunnings. They are like the community mecca now because there is nowhere else to go.”

    The Perth CBD and Fremantle are designated tourism precincts and shops can open from 11am to 5pm.

    It is understood Subiaco could be designated a tourism precinct, as well as Joondalup.

    Mr Carpenter’s about-face follows intense lobbying by Shop Distributive and Allied Employees Association head Joe Bullock, who does not want Sunday trading. ]



  26. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the story on the revelations that Troy’s “Victim” was actually supporting him”.



  27. Frank Calabrese says:

    Oh Dear,

    The Rattler is pissed off that Carps came on his show and he wasn’t there :-)



  28. poor lisa says:

    Bob Kucera decided not to run after a ‘family meeting’ on the weekend.

    “Dad please don’t spend our inheritance on printing how-to-vote cards & bunting”.


  29. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Bob Kucera decided not to run after a ‘family meeting’ on the weekend.

    “Dad please don’t spend our inheritance on printing how-to-vote cards & bunting”.]

    Or more precisely, “Don’t Start a Family feud between me and the McGinty Clan”


  30. poor lisa says:

    If that was going to dissuade him it would’ve dissuaded him long ago. I reckon it’s the inheritance.


  31. Frank Calabrese says:

    Has anyone noticed that nearly all of the Libs Door Stops since the election have been outside of Parliament House ?

    Are they scared of Colin mixing it with the plebs or what ?


  32. skink says:

    I have noticed that Michelle Roberts does not have her photo on the ALP website

    Louise Durack has lots of photos of her and Carps, and a whole gallery of her pressing the flesh in her electorate.

    maybe Michelle will get the hint


  33. Frank Calabrese says:

    [maybe Michelle will get the hint]

    But the funny thing is that the Libs had as a candidate at the last election City of Swan Charlie Zannino, and despite all the wogs in the Electorate, she still retained the seat comfortably :-)


  34. flynn says:

    I don’t to get to vote for Carps or Barnie but I’ll bet they are the only two faces on all of the publicity – there should be a rule that every candidate has to have equal time on radio/TV. So if you have a 10 minute speech by Carps then every-one else nominated has to have a similar time slot before he could be inflicted on us again.
    It would make it far more interesting than the presidential style campaigns to which our elections have degenerated.


  35. Carps’ ads are a little odd. He has that washed out look that sort of suggests moving towards the light in near death experiences.


  36. Bilbo Baggins says:

    “Don’t worry Diedre, Troy will soon sniff out another seat for you,,,,,,,,,”

    (apologies to The Letters Page in today’s West Australian)


  37. Frank Calabrese says:

    Audio of Bob Maumill with a sickening “poem” regarding Alan Carpenter.



  38. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is 6PR’s General “State Election” page.



  39. Midlandia says:

    “But the funny thing is that the Libs had as a candidate at the last election City of Swan Charlie Zannino, and despite all the wogs in the Electorate, she still retained the seat comfortably :-)”

    Surely that’s because by and large, people of this electorate are reasonable sorts! =D
    Ol’ Cosimo Zannino’s came off the boat from Italy back in the early 50’s. Nowadays he’s a grape grower, City of Swan Counselor and one-time mayor of said city. He had high name-recognition here, but Roberts was more or less untouchable.
    In regards to her not having a piccy up on the website, this is a stark improvement from yesterday, when she didn’t even have a home page. Instead, we now an very unfinished, extremely obvious cut-paste job, declaring Michelle Roberts to be running in “Albany.”
    On the bright side, the Libs haven’t even decided who to run against her, so that will buy the webmaster some time to put his rear in gear.


  40. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Ol’ Cosimo Zannino’s came off the boat from Italy back in the early 50’s. Nowadays he’s a grape grower, City of Swan Counselor and one-time mayor of said city. He had high name-recognition here, but Roberts was more or less untouchable.]

    And he lives in Swan Hills to boot – not far from my place – his sister is married to Len Brajkovich of Dizzy Lamb Park fame, and well known Liberal Party Supporters.

    There is a funny story of when the Brajkovich family invited Sir Charles Court to dinner and I think Len said when introduced to the then Premier – “Het Charlie How Ya Going” :-)


  41. Midlandia says:

    I remember Dizzy Lamb; my dad’s work had a Christmas family function there years ago. Nice enough place, if memory serves. If I recall, it’s now rather… well, non-existent.
    As for Sir Charles? Needless to say, I think Mr. Brajkovich was ‘courting’ the concept of Australian egalitarianism!

    *Ducks various rotten fruits.*


  42. Don’t forget to check the top of the post for new worst politician images.


  43. Dizzy Lamb has been dealt with previously Midlandia.


  44. The Intellectual Bogan says:

    It may be just my dodgy memory, but perhaps fellow Viz readers can confirm (or deny) that the bloke in the middle looks like Morris Day.


  45. Cookster says:

    I can’t believe Murray’s latest blog efforts, clinging on to the coat tails of Adshead’s latest reporter at large post from Joondalup Hospital.

    He must have thought he’d struck gold, but obviously didn’t think through just how unsavoury a comparison he was making when linking Carps sniffing a baby and Buswell sniffing a female MP’s chair.


  46. poor lisa says:

    Nice comment cookster.

    So a reporter thinks it was cringe-making – he can vote accordingly. The people with a right to have an opinion about it are the newborn’s parents, who presumably handed it over willingly.


  47. Cookster, are you trying to trick me into reading a Paul Murray Blog? You’ll have to do better than that.


  48. Groucho says:

    I personally think that giving something a good sniff before you give it a lick is a good thing. I mean 4.04 million Australian dogs can’t be wrong.


  49. skink says:

    shock horror!

    politician kisses baby!

    another world exclusive from Nurry – almost as good as his “I told you he was a Catholic” during the Pope’s visit


  50. Frank Calabrese says:

    [shock horror!

    politician kisses baby!

    another world exclusive from Nurry – almost as good as his “I told you he was a Catholic” during the Pope’s visit]

    Will he berate readers on the Monday after the Election for returning thr ALP to Govt.


  51. Bento says:

    Following this pattern, I must assume Nurry’s next column will be on the woodland defecation habits of bears.


  52. Cookster says:

    @ Lisa – nice to see a fellow TWOPper on the Wurst’s comments list.

    Teh Murray must be feeling a bit deflated about now… asking all his ‘mates’ to write in and say how funny he is and how this must surely be the pivotal point of the election campaign. FAILED.


  53. Don’t encourage him.


  54. Tony T says:

    Is Simon O’Brien an American? That moustache screams “I can do you a deal on this Saratoga Springs condo.”


  55. Depends if Plonkerville is in the US.


  56. Tony T says:

    With all the Poms in WA, maybe he came from here.


  57. Bilbo Baggins says:

    Is that the same “Tony T” of the Cricket blog?


  58. Check the link. Yes, tis him.


  59. Frank Calabrese says:

    And Shelley Archer has decided not to run for the Upper House as an Independent after all.



  60. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Well, well, well.]

    Yes, but she would still have the Balance of Power in the Upper House until next May, so she could be a thorn in either leader’s side.


  61. Frank Calabrese says:

    And Colin’s Canal for 2008 – Uranium Mining.



  62. Frank Calabrese says:


    Can you please add this pic of Noel Chricton-Browne to the Worst Photo Gallery to illustrate that even the Libs are part of the Brian Burke web. :-)


  63. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the reason why Shelley decided to quit.

    Why Shelley Archer resigned.

    [Ms Archer, the Upper House Member for the Mining and Pastoral Region, said she had decided not to contest the next election because she could not justify standing against the Labor Party, for which she was formerly a member.

    “I’m an ALP person, I’m a Labor Party person, and I couldn’t justify in my own mind standing against what I’ve believed and worked for, for the past 30-40 years,” she said.

    “Even though I don’t like people in the ALP, at the end, there’s a lot of people there I do admire whom I just couldn’t justify standing against, so, here I am.”]



  64. frank #62 Well The Lazy Aussie’s Uranium shares have been dead recently. At least I’ll get some reward if Colin wins.

    #63. yes

    #64 And she wanted more time for holidays with the Burkes


  65. Frank Calabrese says:

    politics really is swings and roundabouts

    But the Libs big policy announcement was written by Howard Sattler himself :-)



  66. Frank Calabrese says:

    And guess what, you can’t play them


  67. Frank Calabrese says:

    And guess what, you can’t play them

    At least not in Firefox, but you can in IE.


  68. Frank Calabrese says:

    And the “3 Strikes and your in” Laws for Yoofs is back, Haven’t the Libs learnt from last time that the laws Carmen introduced thanks to Sattler’s “Rally For Justice” were declared invalid ?


    The Opposition says there are a number of other offences for which children must be locked up for including homicide and if they record three aggravated burglary convictions.



  69. Klaus says:

    Crichton-Browne in Crikey today:

    “The Western Australian Liberal Party stumbled badly on two issues this week, which in the normal course of events should have been substantial pluses for them — daylight saving and extended shopping hours.
    “At first blush these may appear to be second-line issues, however both continue to generate very considerable agitation among voters. Getting them right is free votes in the bank.”

    “At first blush” – has he developed a touch of the Nurries?


  70. skink says:

    Gary Chookshed – is he supposed to be funny?

    is he trying to be funny?

    is this the West’s idea of biting political satire – barbershop hair?

    and they say ze Germans have no sense of humour


  71. Frank Calabrese says:

    Gary Chookshed – is he supposed to be funny?

    is he trying to be funny?

    is this the West’s idea of biting political satire – barbershop hair?

    and they say ze Germans have no sense of humour

    And even worse, he’s recycling the footage fora story on “the lighter side of the election” for Today Tonight.

    So even more morons will see this crap.


  72. skink says:

    they put it on TV?

    really? and they pay him?

    The Chaser won’t be losing any sleep


  73. flynn says:

    I agree with the Opposition Frank @71 – there are lots of occasions when children should be locked up – being obnoxious in a restaurant, screeching within 50 meters of me, kicking the back of my plane seat. (So should their parents for not teaching them some basic manners.)


  74. Rolly says:


    If it ever enters your mind to migrate to Italy, consider self immolation as a viable, or even preferable, alternative.
    In the South in particular, the little bastards rule the roost.
    It’s impossible to get a moment’s respite from the hyperactive performances of the “Mothers’ Darlings”.
    And don’t ever dare raise a word of criticism; it could, at the very least, get you howled out of the restaurant.
    There’s nothing so formidable as a mob of infuriated mediterranean “Mammas”.
    Not even an “offer you can’t refuse” from the mafiosi.


  75. Frank Calabrese says:

    And even worse, he’s recycling the footage fora story on “the lighter side of the election” for Today Tonight.

    So even more morons will see this crap.

    And predictably, the Today Tonight story is on West TV – don’t you love cross media ownership :-)



  76. Frank Calabrese says:

    From SeanofPerth via Pollbludger.

    The Libs must have Sattler as their campaign manager if this is anything to go by.

    SeanofPerth Says:
    August 16th, 2008 at 7:20 pm

    the libs will be making one of their first major election pledges 2mw… a $40m prison for young people, and $15m to start planning a major prison for adults. no i am not joking.



  77. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the Prison plan in Black & White.



  78. skib says:

    I guess they’ll need it with the mandatory sentencing laws planned.

    So the plan is to put all the young people behind bars? They really did get their policy from talkback radio.


  79. Frank Calabrese says:

    Another Howard Sattler inspired announcement.



  80. The Liberal party are really asking for a full on Internet comedy assault with their “hard on dregs” policies or is that “hard-on dregs”. Whatever Colon is proving he’ll do anything to get into power.


  81. New Picture added. Lib Brian Burke Ad. see top of post.


  82. Frank Calabrese says:

    New Picture added. Lib Brian Burke Ad.

    The “reasons on the rear of that ad are kilers, especially “Free Criminals” :-)

    LA, please post that side for their “reasons” taken straight from 6PR talkback listeners and presenters.


  83. Reverse lib ad flyer added.


  84. skink says:

    Free Criminals?

    are they giving them away?

    Vote One, get one free?


  85. Frank Calabrese says:

    From the Kicking an Own Goal dept.

    Was reading in the local paper (Midland Echo) all the candidates statements and noticed that the Liberal Candidate for Midland Peter MacDowell was claiming that the closure of the Midland Railway Workshops tore the Heart out of midland.

    Small problem, it was one of the First Acts that the Court Liberal Government did, when they were elected to Government.

    What a way to remind people NOT to vote Liberal :-)


  86. Frank Calabrese says:

    Was reading in the local paper (Midland Echo) all the candidates statements and noticed that the Liberal Candidate for Midland Peter MacDowell was claiming that the closure of the Midland Railway Workshops tore the Heart out of midland.

    Article scanned and sent to Lazy Aussie, who will hopefully post it here :-)

    And here is the pdf file of that “wanted” Poster of Fran Logan as featured on West TV.


    Ahh, More Comedy Gold from the Libs :-)


  87. Frank Calabrese says:

    Another Sattler File Policy from the Libs :-)



  88. Very funny Frank “no hugs for thugs ” , zero tolerance policy for hooligan shenanigans. One strike and your dead meat . The Liberal party will have prisons coming out your wazoo.


  89. Rolly says:

    I think that a more honest slogan might be:
    “Help keep women out of politics – Vote Liberal”


  90. Frank Calabrese says:

    According to Seven News, the “Leaders Debate” will not be shown live as according to Ch 9, they don’t have the facilities for a live broadcast, but they have assured that it will be screened unedited.

    I know that the ABC couldn’t do it as their studios would be unavailable due to the construction of the Tally Room, but you’d think Nine would hire from the ABC, a Digital Outside Broadcast van for the event.

    This was the reason why Carps wanted the debate last Friday Night.


  91. Frank Calabrese says:

    Gary Adshead with the “voterss” of Osboirne Park – I reckon LA could do this sort of stuff better.



  92. skink says:

    shit, my dog could do that better. He produces crap on the sidewalk too

    pathetic ripoff of the Chaser’s “this person votes” and Leno’s “Jaywalking”, except the punters don’t say anything endearingly stupid.


  93. Klaus says:

    By the way, the party widely and erroneously known as ‘Family First’ is in actuality called ‘Firmly Fist’. It’s a typo on all their election material.

    They should really look into that.


  94. Frank Calabrese says:

    Time for some fun and games courtesy of Perth Now :-)

    PERTHNOW gives you the chance to grill Colin Barnett. Post a question to the Opposition leader online for your chance to get the answers YOU want.

    We’ll sort through the best questions and ask Mr Barnett on your behalf.

    No spin or sidetracking, just direct answers courtesy of PerthNow and The Sunday Times.

    We’ll publish the best question and Mr Barnett’s responses in The Sunday Times on Sunday



  95. hahhaahahahahaq. snort!


  96. poor lisa says:

    Speaking of Family Fist, A (Anthony or Alan?) Fels is 1 of the 2 MP’s opposed to closing the non members bar in Parliament House.


  97. Frank Calabrese says:

    Another 6PR inspired Liberal Policy Announcement.

    An elected Liberal Government would legislate to allow for the naming of teenagers as young as 16 who have been charged over serious crimes.

    But the juvenile offenders would only be named if they were repeat offenders or had been charged over serious crimes, and were being dealt with outside the Children’s Court, either in the District Court or the WA Supreme Court.

    The Liberals policy was launched as a 16-year-old faced the Perth Children’s Court charged over the alleged bashing and robbery of a 35-year-old woman who suffers from cerebral palsy.

    It is alleged the teenager, who has been charged with one count of aggravated robbery, bashed and mugged the woman at the Curtin University bus station on Saturday.

    State Opposition leader Colin Barnett and shadow attorney-general Christian Porter announced the policy at the scene of a violent attack on a woman with cerebral palsy.

    “For too long young offenders who commit serious crimes have been able to escape the consequence of their actions and hide their identities because of their age,” Mr Barnett said.

    “It is time the crime of young offenders is given propriety over their age.”

    Mr Barnett and Mr Porter said factors to be taken into account in the naming of juvenile offenders included the seriousness of offence, other charges the offender was facing, the maturity of the accused, protection of community and the offender’s criminal history.



  98. skink says:

    is that correct use of the word ‘propriety’?

    did he mean ‘priority’?

    and have they repeated the third par?

    have the West sacked all their subs as well?

    something odd about a guy called Christian advocating harsher punishment for minors.

    maybe he missed that bit about ‘suffer little children’


  99. Cookster says:

    Almost time to light the torches, break out the pitchforks and march on the castle…


  100. Frank Calabrese says:

    Has anyone noticed that there have been no more West TV items by Gary Adshead since last Friday.

    Has TWOP claimed another Scalp ? :-)


  101. I think Carps has fucked it. All the negative ads are just terrible. He should have let the libs stay irrelevant and concentrated on the building for the future stuff. Big mistake.


  102. Frank Calabrese says:

    I think Carps has fucked it. All the negative ads are just terrible. He should have let the libs stay irrelevant and concentrated on the building for the future stuff. Big mistake.

    Gallop did the same in 2005, first ads positive, last 2 weeks negative and it worked.

    Barnett will implode next week when the costings are released :-)


  103. I still think he should have just ignored the libs.


  104. Frank Calabrese says:

    From Pollbludger.

    The West features a Robert Taylor piece headed “Carpenter as good as home as early swing to the Liberals stalls”:

    Sources from both major parties say the swing to the WA Liberals that was evident at the start of the election campaign two weeks ago has stalled and voters are drifting back to the Government, making a Labor vicoty at the September 6 election a near certainty.

    Nightly tracking polls conducted by both parties show the swing to the Liberals is down to around two per cent, half of what they need to claim government. The Liberals are tracking voters in eight marginal seats, Labor is polling in five But both see the same trend, and it’s a win to Labor.

    Since the leaders’ debate on Monday night, numbers have firmed considerably for Labor with voters believing Alan Carpenter won the contest. Despite the debate being a ratings loser, word of mouth has estabilshed in voters’ minds that Mr Carpenter emerged victorious.

    Labor also believes it’s on a winner with its anti-uranium stand, particularly among female voters and despite Mr Capenter’s backflip on deciding to legislate to ban it …

    Labor sources said they expected losses to be contained to three or four seats, two of which, Darling Range and Bunbury, are held by Liberal incumbents anyway because of the one vote, one value redistribution. And Labor still has not given up on Albany and Geraldton, held by incumbent Government MPs Peter Watson and Shane Hill. Albany is said to have swung towards the Government in recent days. Both sides believe the Liebrals have something of a stranglehold on Kingsley, held by Labor’s Judy Hughes. Ocean Reef, Collie-Preston and Riverton remain in play.

    The Liberals yesterday launched a new television advertisement targeting law and order, health services, schools, public transport and roads but Labor research shows that so far voters believe its advertsing has been more effective.



  105. SkyLantern says:

    Yep, I agree LA. Calling the election early was a dangerous ploy by Crapenter. Instead of trying to catch Branett unprepared he should have allowed him a few months as Opposition leader and let him make a fool of himself on his own. But this short negative campaign is just giving the Libs free publicity. And the risk is that there might not be enough time for Branett to implode, at least in the minds of the voters. Also, the Libs’ silent show of unity behind Branett wouldn’t have lasted long anyway because I suspect most of them actually can’t stand him.


  106. Frank Calabrese says:


    You obviously didn’t read Post 110 :-)

    I say this is an exact replay of 2005 and replace the Canal with Uranium Mining :-)


  107. skink says:

    even Paul Nurry has come out calling it for Labour in this morning’s West.

    who would have thought it?

    I can only think that with both the Libs and the ALP saying that they expect to lose, that they are terrified of complete voter apathy and want to panic their core voters.

    my personal theory is that toggle voters do not care about either party enough to vote for them. They have not taken to Carpenter, and want to spank him for a lacklustre tenure and a few gaffs, but they like the Libs even less, and don’t trust them to govern any better.

    The minor parties are not a serious option in the Lower House, so what do you do? I reckon both parties fear that most folk plan to stay home.


  108. Cookster says:

    The Perth Files Poll is showing a worrying trend:

    Who will you vote for?

    Carps 33%

    Col Canal 50%

    The Greens 5%

    What election? 11%

    I fear the conservative elements have hijacked this, so if you’re a Carps man or woman and haven’t voted yet, do it now and send the link to your lefty mates.



  109. skink says:

    this is not very scientific – can we have some accurate polling please?

    what does Miss Maud’s coffee bean poll predict?

    has she called the election yet?


  110. Skink of all the psephs : Pollbludger , Mumble , Possumcomitatus , SImon Jackman ; Pollbludger are running the strongest on the W.A. election. The rest seem to have died in the paper on it.


  111. Cookster says:

    @Skink – scientific no, but knowing the ‘bent’ of TPF’s readership I would have thought Carps would be a bolter… hmmm


  112. skink says:

    Bill – yes, I know – I am a Pollbludger regular now

    (and the Cookster is trawling for traction there too)

    Sattler is having another go with his ‘Struggle Street’ trope –
    get over there and yank his chain



  113. My Ning says:

    I bet ol’ canal Colin’s a wee bit pissed with The West. Afterall, there he was, about to retire from a party in complete shambles, when the paper cooks up a weekend poll story (a survey which it conducted itself, no less) saying the Libs had a fighting chance.

    So what happens? One time loser Barnett triumphantly returns, only to have the rag turn on him (yes, I’m referring to Murray’s thing this morning).

    Just think – he could have taken the money and run to a nicely paid teaching job but has, instead, decided to let himself be beaten by an ineffectual sour pus, all because the worst paper in Australia told him to do so.

    In short, on the Worst’s recommendation, he will now be remembered as a two time loser. What will make his legacy all the more embarrising is the fact he failed to beat a slovenly government that sometime looks as if it’s stuck in an intellectual vacuum.

    What a plonker!

    Still, we will be better off without Colin and those conservative “I’ll do what my parents want me to do” dickheads that make up the current WA opposition. Apart from the fact he has an uglier set of fangs than Eric Ripper (now that sez something), he now expects WA dope smokers to look to the east to get their their bongs and pipes? Is that progess? Will this retail supression help fix the health crisis. I thought the clown wanted to liberate the shopping sector, not supress it.

    Furthermore, while we all might like to believe this ALP government is arrogant, the electorate should think back on what it had during the Coalition rule of the 1990s.

    Anyone remember Graham Kierath? Absolutely hideous person (you could almost smell his bad breath when you saw him on TV). And what about Monty House? Richard Court? My God, how we don’t miss them. Eric Charlton? Affable guy perhaps, but really, a minister of the crown? Hendy Cowan? Now there was a top class wanker. As was Kevin Prince…the list goes on.

    Of course these guys are no longer around, but there’s nothing about the rabble in opposition at the moment to suggest that it will operate any differently than during the days when the school prefects ran the show.

    But back to Barnett for the moment. The fact he let the Worst hijack his political retirement plans shows that he’s not good at taking advice – either that or he simply takes bad advice from the wrong people.

    This is the reason why: (1) we should never vote for him, and (2) he will never be offered a position on a major company’s board, despite the fact he has been a resources minister and he knows all of the market rhetoric.

    For once I hope Murray is right…..


  114. David Cohen says:

    Howard wrote:

    Last I checked, residence in Melville did not qualify for welfare support.

    I wonder if Howard wrote the sign featured in WW14:


  115. David Cohen says:

    And why haven’t we had any more pics from LA at the top of this post? It’s an outrage wrapped in a disgrace inside a shambles.


  116. Cookster says:

    @Skink – yes, I am the proverbial Col Canal scrambling for traction up the face of the sandhill while being pelted with boodies from above by Carps.


  117. Frank Calabrese says:

    I see David “fucking Outrage” Cohen has been writing about Pollies Wikipedia sites being changed :-)



  118. #121, Becuase photoshopping is harder than tossing off a haiku.


  119. Thanks My Ning. Fantastic.Why aren’t you writing Nurries’ column? Jeez what a cunt, (bastard). Spends two weeks talking up Colin and then suddenly craps all over him.


  120. skink says:

    Brilliant article Mr Cohen

    I have it on very good authority that Matt Birney is indeed “minutely endowed”.

    Wiki have removed a point of fact, and I will be very circumspect about using them in future.


  121. Frank Calabrese says:

    And congratulations to Skink for bringing thetruthabouttroy.com to the public attention :-)


  122. Frank Calabrese says:

    Bill Johnston on ABC Radio re thetruthabouttroy.com.



  123. David Cohen says:

    wiki wiki Bill
    site springs up then site comes down
    where is his entry?


  124. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the ABC TV story.


    Talk about a storm in a D Cup, and short memories – I seem to recall the Federal Liberal Party at the last two Federal Elections run similar sites dedicated to both Mark Latham and Kevin Rudd, and they weren’t shut down.


  125. Frank I vote that you create the truthaboutTroy.wordpress.com site.


  126. You can’t handle the truth.


  127. Scurrilous says:

    My Ning – I do remember Graham Kierath – I remember marching on Parliament house shouting ‘Keirath’s a wanker” with thousands of like minded west ozzies. I think we burned his effigy – oh glory days – it was Paris 1968 right here in Perth.

    I remember the election night when he lost his seat, he was in the tally room and his face was getting more and more grey and he started muttering about postal votes …

    One of my happiest memories.


  128. Frank Calabrese says:

    here is how ch 9 have reported on truthabouttroy.com, and note Nadia Mitsopoulous claiming it was online last night – no, Skink posted it yesterday morning on Pollbludger :-)



  129. Frank Calabrese says:

    hmm, just did a domain lookup for http://www.thetruthabouttroy.com and it’s available.


  130. Frank Calabrese says:

    Actually this is the info on http://truthabouttroy.com

    WHOIS information for: truthabouttroy.com:


    Reseller…………..: FAST HIT – http://domains.fasthit.net
    Created on…………: 18 Jun 2008 15:23:20 EST
    Expires on…………: 18 Jun 2009 15:23:20 EST
    Record last updated on: 18 Jun 2008 15:23:20 EST
    Status…………….: ACTIVE

    Owner, Administrative Contact, Technical Contact, Billing Contact:
    Glide Strategic
    Michael Woodhouse (ID00306832)
    Level 5,12 St Georges Tce
    Perth, Western Australia 6000
    Phone: +61.892188888
    Email: neil@glidestrategic.com.au

    Domain servers in listed order:



  131. Yeah LA the truth is out there somewhere. Anyways for a little PerthMeow embarrassment predicament here’s one ( to balance the Wikipedia embarrassment of DFOC)
    This character earned his millions from a SMS scam and is still at it.


  132. Frank Calabrese says:

    We must set up a Worst of Perth IRC channel :-) or have a flashchat room for real time chat in a group.


  133. For the election count or in general?


  134. I would liveblog the election count, but I have just realised I don’t know what that means.

    You coming to comedy Frank?


  135. Frank Calabrese says:

    In General, and no I’m not coming :-(


  136. You’re not going to pull some medical excuse are you like Rolly? If you can get to the Midland Reception Centre…


  137. Frank Calabrese says:

    If you can get to the Midland Reception Centre…

    It’s closer to my place from the Charles and I don’t drive. Do a gig in town during the day and I’ll consider it :-)


  138. I’m inclined to respond with pissweak, but considering the volume and quality of comments, I’ll restrain myself. Email me if you think we can do something amusing and live election night. Who would go to any other site if TWOP covers it? I would need help though, as I wouldn’t know a Judy Edwards from a dog’s bum with a hat on.


  139. New pictures on Election post.


  140. David Cohen says:

    Excellent LA – no nagging for a day or two.

    Mr Jacob is from the same ward as Family First’s Trona Young – what do they have in the water up there?


  141. skink says:

    that Albert Jacob looks like a hairdresser, and I was very surprised that a man with that much product in his hair is married – but I think the arse in the photo belongs to his lovely wife Cecylia, who appears to be the daughter of dyslexic parents.

    Ocean Reef is an interesting seat – the ALP have put up Louise Durack, who is one of of Alan’s Angels parachuted into the seat over the top of the local branch. You will seldom see Carps doing walkabout when she is not in shot behind his shoulder. Maybe Jacob is putting his wife’s arse front and centre to challenge Durack for the blonde vote

    As a key marginal that needs less than 2% swing to the Libs, you might have thought they could have found someone with a bit more gravitas than a tree surgeon with boy band hair


  142. Cookster says:

    Fuck me TLA, Albert looks like he’d make a great Doctor Who!


  143. Vic Demised says:

    Pity the WA election doesn’t get anyone’s blood racing like this from The Rude Pundit.



  144. Vic , it aint all that rude and is very American “We’re Americans” . Yeah right , you want freedom fries with that. In the meantime where’s that truth about Troy site Frank.


  145. Frank Calabrese says:

    In the meantime where’s that truth about Troy site Frank.

    As an ALP member, no can do – too risky – best be done by someone with no party

    /me looks at Lazy Aussie :-)


  146. What am i supposed to be doing? I’m not sure what i have to do.


  147. Frank Calabrese says:

    What am i supposed to be doing? I’m not sure what i have to do.

    Basically rehost and/or expand the Truth About Troy site.


  148. Bill O'Slatter says:

    This is what you do LA : you stick the chair in the air and sing “ting ga ling a loo” and shake it all about.


  149. Frank Calabrese says:

    Oh Dear, Colin is going to look like a dill if this is indeed the case. is this his costings blunder 2008 version ?

    INPEX is set to start drilling in Darwin Harbour within weeks – but the company still has not decided where to build the $12 billion gas plant.

    The Japanese gas giant will spend the next three months drilling 26 holes – 40m deep – around Blaydin Point to test the geological and foundation conditions for the proposed jetties.

    But Inpex still insists a decision has not been made on where to build the gas plant.

    Darwin is being considered along with the Maret Islands, off the Kimberly and Western Australia’s proposed LNG hub.

    Chief Minister Paul Henderson said he had not been told if “we’re there yet”. “I’ve done everything I can. We have a framework agreement in place that gives the company certainty,” he said.


    which is related to this.

    Mr Barnett says he has information that Inpex told Mr Ripper’s Chief of Staff on August 18 that it had decided where the project would be built.

    “His Chief-of-Staff took the phone call and was informed by Inpex they had made their decision on the site of the gas project that they were developing,” he said.

    “It is my firm understanding that decision was to locate the plant in Darwin.”

    Mr Ripper says Inpex told him a week ago that it still had not made a decision on the location of the plant.

    “I was told that they are still determining their position and that was the advice I got on August the 21st and no I haven’t been told anything different,” he said.

    “Previously? Previously, I haven’t been told anything different, they’re still determining their position.”



  150. Cookster says:

    Just put it on the site of the fucking Man Lin – tell KFC to piss off, run the pipe down Manning Rd and stick the jetty on the Swan near the Sea Scouts hall.


  151. poor lisa says:

    It was poor lisa.

    He uses Redken tuff stuff or something apparently.

    Are you guys telling me you don’t go out on election night? You stay in? What’s that like!


  152. Cookster says:

    I was in Sydney for the Federal election, staying gratis in a plush new hotel in Kings Cross.

    On election day I wandered about the streets of Bondi, hoping to get involved in a punch-on with Caroline Overington, or Malcolm T at least.

    Election night I spent sprawled on a king size bed, nibbling on horses doovers and watching the Liberal Party collapse live on a king size plasma.


  153. David Cohen says:

    Poor lisa is on drugs. Or will be next Saturday. why, oh why, would you go out when Anthony Green, Kerry ‘The Red Terror’ O’Brien et al provide all the entertainment you could possibly need?? If you do go out the only place worth being is the tally room. I still get goosebumps remembering when Pauline ‘Please Explain’ Hanson walked in to the tally room in 2001…


  154. Frank Calabrese says:

    Are you guys telling me you don’t go out on election night? You stay in? What’s that like!

    As at the last 3 federal and state elections, I’ll be at the ALP post poll function for Swan Hills/Midland/Bassendean/and possibly West Swan. in 2005 I got my ugly little mug on the ABC telecast when they crossed to Jaye Radisch, and I look the same now as I did then.

    2004 Federal Ection was the worst (it was my first one when Sharyn Jackson lost Hasluck (I was onthe Pearce Campaign with David Ritter, and I singlehandedly halted the New Country Party from getting more than 600 od votes when I discovered that their How To Vote Card breached the Electoral Act- the Candidate was Jeanette Radisicch and she was NOT related to Jaye.


  155. Rolly says:

    You’re just a rabble-rousing trouble-maker Franco: And for god’s sake *please* keep up the good work :D
    Do you ever look in on the http://www.beppegrillo.it blog to see the current state of the state of Italy?
    Shakespeare’s “..methinks there is something rotten in the state of Denmark.” has nothing on it.


  156. poor lisa says:

    Oh come on. Why would you stay in drinking boutique beer watching Anthony Green with your feet up when you could stand in the sun at a school gate for 10 hours, scrutineer, drive to Mirrabooka or Forrestfield for a party in a drab hall where everyone’s too tired to speak and there are no seats so you have to stand up for another 3 hours & you can’t drink because you have to pilot home a car stuffed to the hatch with corflute and bunting?

    It’s especially good when your party loses, and a stunning night out when your candidate doesn’t win. It’s the essence of democracy. I think Frank and I must move in the same circles.


  157. Rolly says:

    In the same circles, p-l? Do you have a flat tyre too?


  158. margeryx says:

    I usually stay in to watch the ABC telecast of the election, but for this one I will be in Cleveland, Ohio, with no chance of finding out who won. Pretty sure Fox News won’t be covering it, so it’s up to you, LA.


  159. Rolly says:


    The AussieBC will probably have the whole schemozzle on their broadband internet site so you might be able to watch that. (Though why anyone would want to put themselves through such exquisite agony, I have no comprehension.)


  160. David Cohen says:

    Corflute. good word. I bet LA won’t have any of that in his live blog of the epoch-making events in a week’s time.

    I feel a haiku coming on…

    Corflute and bunting
    Wiggle in the hot air of
    The speech of defeat.


  161. margeryx says:

    Thankx Rolly, I will have access to broadband, so should be able to watch the whole schemozzle (If I am still compos enough calculate the time and day after travelling for three days to get there from here.)

    Agony, what agony? I love a good schemozzle!


  162. Rolly says:


    “…….I love a good schemozzle!”

    Perhaps you’re too young and ingenuous to have developed the required degree of cynicism required at my level on the ‘ennui’ scale :(


  163. Bill O'Slatter says:

    truthabouttroy.wordpress.com site created.


  164. See top of post for new pic from Frank. Libs Boys club


  165. Also see the top for Lib candidate for Midland. Trying to look like a Chinese wombat.


  166. Frank Calabrese says:

    Ahh, Peter Macdowell who in his blurb in the Midland Echo whined about the Heart of Midland being ripped out by the closure of the Midland Workshops, , with the irony that it was the Libs who closed it in 1994.


  167. Did anyone see the Carps with family Ad on TV? His daughter looked a bit sour faced about it all. She probably can’t vote anyway.


  168. Frank Calabrese says:

    Did anyone see the Carps with family Ad on TV? His daughter looked a bit sour faced about it all. She probably can’t vote anyway.

    You mean this ad ?


    BTW,I made Seven News, and I’m shaking Carps hand :-)


  169. You get to kiss his ring Frank? You might make channel 10 if so.


  170. Frank Calabrese says:

    And Amanda O’Brien at the same event I wwas at ?



  171. Frank Calabrese says:

    And here is the Campaign Song.



  172. Frank Calabrese says:

    Frpm Pollbludger:

    Inside Cover: A photo shows Ainslie Gatt, the Liberal candidate for Maylands, in bed with four other comely young lasses. This was taken at the home of “Raunchy Promotions boss Steve Zielinski, who was holding a cocktail party to celebrte 28 years in business”.


  173. skink says:

    clearly the five lovely daughters of Mrs Palmer


  174. Frank Calabrese says:

    Forgot to post this on sunday, but was wheeling past Miss Mauds in the Carilion and noticed their Coffee Bean Poll.

    As of Sunday approx 1pm the count was:

    Morning Tea Party – 61
    Democrats – 1
    Greens – 40
    ALP – 145
    Liberal – 180
    Nationals – 3
    Others – <20

    Note these are approximate figures.


  175. skink says:

    so assuming that the Greens’ bean preferences go to the ALP, and the Nats go to the Libs, then Miss Maud is predicting a narrow victory for Carps on preferences, although that Morning Tea Party could be a wild card.

    still, it’s more accurate than Westpoll or Galaxy


  176. David Cohen says:

    Miss Mauds have serious competition out Midland way now: a huge Dome has opened on the western side of Midland Gate. No MTP voters sighted there last weekend.


  177. Had a few Libs up, but who’s the freakiest looking on the Labor side? What about the grossest green. I keep thinking Alannah for Labor, but there must be worse.


  178. skink says:

    is it compulsory to wear a big hat if you are standing for a pastoral seat?

    McGowan looks like a game-show host stood in front of that curtain:

    “Mark, show the voters what they can win tonight!”


  179. Now we need a detailed account of each candidate :
    Hairstyle : Good/ Medium / Poor / McTiernienian
    In Burkes’s pocket : Yes /No
    In Crichton-Brownes pocket : Yes / No
    Intelligence : Genius / Average / Plonker /Can’t tie shoelaces / Gnat
    Owes : Everybody/ Some people with money / Some people without money / the Mafia / Sleazy mining companies /lobbyists /nobody


  180. I like that Bill. How about Wife/husband’s arse, Jacob, to Archer


  181. David Cohen says:

    Hats are essential in the sticks, skink:


    (but Panamas are forbidden, of course).


  182. Martin Whitely added to gallery above. I don’t know many of the details for the O’slatter scale.
    Hairstyle: trending McTiernan
    Head: trending Cthulhu
    In Burke’s pocket: Unknown
    Intelligence: Unknown
    Owes: Unknown, (scientologists?)
    Wife’s arse: Unknown


  183. Yes good one LA . In my first past attempt at capturing motivators I forgot the most important motivator both in elector and elected : sex. So husband’s /wife’s arse is connected to
    Can keep hands to self : Yes /possibly / has sexy arse at home / needs many partners and now .


  184. Bento says:

    I like Bill’s political spectrometer.

    How about ‘Supported by Nurry’: Yes / This week but not last week / today but not yesterday / Last week but not this week / Yesterday but not today / No.


  185. skink says:

    “I don’t like the ALP. I think they are turning WA into a police state…Criminals get off light..we need more police officers.”

    she’s been listening to Sattler

    I was particulary touched by the old bloke who wants it to be safe for his grandchildren to go cottaging in King’s Park at 10pm. what other reason would they be there at that time?


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