The Asia Beat returns
“Mushy Mushy”, the Asian food blogger, (real name Kimberly Li) has infuriated top Singapore chef Johnny Cho.
Li, who through a medical condition can only eat food in liquid form, travels with a blender, reducing meals to a paste or slurry, which she eats, then reviews on her popular blog.
Li described the liquefied version of Cho’s Shrimp Mince, Orange and Tomato Tart as “Like a stale prawn cracker milkshake.”
Cho immediately jumped online questioning Li’s ability to judge food – particularly multi textured dishes. “It’s completely outrageous. You can’t judge a dish like this. She’s an idiot. I tried to have her banned before. I thought I had stopped it all when I wouldn’t let her plug in her blender, but somehow she had a battery powered one made up with the motor from a leaf blower.” Cho’s first attack on Li was quickly removed, as the Chef had…
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Kimberley’s medical condition had been brought about when she’d placed both hands in her blender to retrieve a very large gold ring purchased after the dollar and rupiah had both taken a beating. The prawn cracker milkshake immediately took on an attractive blood Orange hue, a most propitious colour, but sadly the bionic gold chopsticks dr Cheung grafted on in place of hands were rejected after a month and sent to the mint for reprocessing to London metals market standards. The nurses had even christened her Kimberley scissorhands and posted photos on Facebook. Kimberley didn’t mind. She’d found her gold ring which had appreciated in value while the ringgit and yuan continued to take a beating. Her next project would be a digital cookbook of her mother’s favourite singlish recipes. Poor Kimberley. Now she had no hands to beat her underpaid Indonesian maid. But she still had a blender and tapioca pearls and the value of the new apartment she rented to illegal workers from Myanmar had tripled. Her new show would be called Kimberley’s creole kitchen. Her thoughts turned to green papaya and jellied chicken feet-lah. In a blender of course-lah.
Johnny Cho can lick my balls.