I used to weep in bookshops. You know, if reclaim racists want a song, I’m willing to let them have Hey True Blue. Arguably Australia’s shittiest song. Let it be our “Horst Vessel”.
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The Worst of Perth 
Yeah but has he nearly been blown up in Thailand?
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He wishes.
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They’ve already got Lee Kernagan’s almost unequivocal support, him with his “Spirit of the Anzacs” an’ all. I think you’d find John Williamson quite decent in comparison.
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Demonstrates Ellis’s ability to back winners or to hit the bottle , whichever you prefer.
From https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Ellis
Ellis’s 2011 book Suddenly, Last Winter – An Election Diary created headlines for its criticism of the Labor Prime Minister, Julia Gillard, and praise for the Liberal Opposition Leader, Tony Abbott. He described Gillard as “not well informed” and “sudden, firm and wrong” in everything she does. He also said “She has no power, no influence, no friends, no learning. There’s not much there” whilst describing Abbott as having “good manners”, being “formidable” and possessing a “first-class mind”
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Bob Ellis is a national living treasure. Like a Japanese soldier in the PNG jungle or an unwanted house guest from a Don’s Party theme night he continues to defame and entertain in equal measure. Fortunately that other absurdist Labor character Bob Carr recognised his importance and keeps Ellis in cheap liquor for our edification and amusement.
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I know! Let’s play musical battleships, I’ll be Johnny Horton and Sink the Bismarck you can be Horst Vessel .. POW BANG ACKACKACK BOOF .. How I love the smell of TruBlu Valkyries in the morning!
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Hey True Blue is certainly maudlin and way too earnest, but Australia’s shittiest song? I just Googled Bound For Glory by Angry Anderson and that is surely the pits? Not only is it hit with the 80’s stick large (it was released in the 90’s, but well, you know how long it takes some people to catch up) but Angry bangs on about sports people being “warriors” in that god awful voice of his over horrible sounding scratchy guitars. Also it’s title is pinched from Woody Guthrie, which surely desrves incarceration?
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Angry does back it up with some cutting edge climate denial these days.
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I once had the ignominious displeasure of “interviewing” Gary on 6UVS. Don’t ask.
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No, here’s the worst –
Hey Big Red
Is he really dead?
Or did he fake it just for money
and he’s hiding under the bed?
Is his stash in Africa – or Vanuatu
With a Cockatoo?
Hey Big Re-eed
Hey Big Red
Is he really gone,
Or, did he pull a Houdini
And he’ll be back later on?
Is he’s standing up at the helm
of a yacht somewhere,
Skolling Swan Draught beer?
Hey Big Re-eeed
Hey Big Red
Don’t say he’s dead,
Say he’s doing deals with Arabs
In the Caliphate,
Busting sanctions just for fun,
on the run …
Hey Big Re-eeed
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I was once asked if I would like to go to one of his concerts….but I decided to visit a proctologist instead.
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Macca is a big fan of John. That’s never a good sign.
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Urgh. Guess you can’t choose your fans.
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I’ve actually got his shirt. It’s a Rivers,$3 from Vinnies. He was even kind enough to autograph it ‘John’ with black texta on the label. Poor bastard must have been force to sell it during a drought or flood.
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Jeezus.
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