Cundle Burke

Jaiydn-Jaxxon discovered the old Cundlebar homestead where Burkean ceremonies are still performed 30 years later. Look at them all so young. Carmen Lawrence looking like a suicidal woman wouldn’t melt in her mouth, Peter Dowding believing in a future you could believe in. Julian Grill when the oil oozing out of him was close to extra virgin. Good times. Must have been disappointing JJ. Hoping for a 1983 Hustler? (Julian notwithstanding). JJ writes,

Around the line of Capricorn, up there in Martu land,
A highwayman once came to rest, and with his robber band.
‘Midst cattle-dust and spinifex and trees tied up in knots,
Old Cundle Burke’s been sleeping, while his homestead slowly rots.
Corruption’s set itself in place, for years and years it seems;
The fridge is dead, the windows gone, white ants devour the beams,
The timbers have all tumbled down, the roof is good and rusted,
But only very recently did Cundle Burke get busted.

‘Twas only as I clambered through that I did spy the thing
In piles of rags and newspaper he’d made himself a king
But something glistened darkly in the dust, and caught my eye –
That kind of oiliness that still persists in things bone dry –
And from its bed of broken boards I knelt down and I plucked it,
Unfurling sheets of text about our state and how he’d fucked it.

God help ye, Cundle Burke, and all the misers, thieves and toadies,
Who still infest our cabinets, and businesses, and banks;
It’s a Faustian relationship, ‘tween voters and their votees,
We’re a people on the rack, and old Mephisto holds the cranks.


About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
This entry was posted in worst politician and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

31 Responses to Cundle Burke

  1. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    Smooth Pierre.


  2. skink says:

    does that photo of Carmen say Ditch the Witch?
    just one more way that that Carmen blazed a trail for Julia.


  3. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    We can safely assume that the owners of Cundlebar homestead were Bell Resources shareholders who banked with Rothwells.


  4. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    Carmen Lawrence shows the sisterhood you don’t need Emilys List to change your own oil filter. You go girl!


  5. rottobloggo says:

    Magnificent words and pics. The political and the poetic: perfect.


  6. vegan says:

    am i missing the photo of big carmen?


  7. My Ning says:

    Speaking of Dowding and Grill:
    “We are satisfied that, during the July (1988) meeting, Mr Dowding DID NOT explain the close connection between the purchase price being paid for PICL (Petrochemical Industries Company Ltd – a joint venture between Dallas Dempster and Laurie Connell) and the size of the problem at Rothwells. NOR DID HE explain that the government was DELIBERATELY building up the value of PICL by a support mechanism and guarantee. Cabinet may well have reached a DIFFERENT VIEW if the real position had been explained. WE REGARD THIS FAILURE BY MR DOWDING AS IMPROPER. It follows that we have rejected Mr Dowding’s view that it was sufficient to tell cabinet merely that commercially appropriate support mechanisms would be put in place. Mr Grill was fully aware of the true situation. He passively allowed cabinet to be uninformed and was thereby implicated in Mr Dowding’s impropriety.” – 1992’s report of the royal commission into commercial activities of government and other matters (my emphasis).


  8. margeryx says:

    Carmen Lawrence broke the Westminster system by lying to Parliament and then refusing to resign. Not that anyone cares.


  9. Pingback: Oiled | The Worst of Perth

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