Yes, but with her holding up one boozie…

I put this one from Meccano from Melbourne as an example of why Perth architecture is bad, a topic I will be expanding on in a lecture to the Curtin architecture department next Friday. This set of apartments by Nonda Katsalidis has been recognised as one of Australia’s best buildings. To me the angel and the bloke with the donger polished black by residents are risible. Why is an angel with a head which is a cross between Mark Webber and Lindy Chamberlain holding up one tit? But the point is that it could be built there and it couldn’t be built here. Horrible though it is, it couldn’t even be proposed here. Colin Barnett would be objecting to the Webber/Chamberlain flange being a threat to our kiddies. Residents wouldn’t even enter the back door of the wille polisher, let alone buy an apartment there. And a skull? Whoa could be an endorsement of euthanasia. With all the money, and all the wealth, here it would have to be bland glass or nothing. Even Melbourne’s bad is better than our good. Which we don’t have anyway.

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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40 Responses to Yes, but with her holding up one boozie…

  1. Bill O'Slatter says:

    “Perth architecture is bad, a topic I will be expanding on in a lecture to the Curtin architecture ” bringing coals to Newcastle , or chins to the chinless , or crimes to the criminals, or pearlers before swine ,………….or……………….


  2. skink says:

    her crossed legs and intense frown suggest she has a full bladder

    the man was also suffering for an urgent need to go, but was pinned down by the building and had to piss down his own leg

    that’s a very small skull she is holding, possibly a marmoset.


  3. Peter says:

    Just out of curiosity, what sort of reaction do you get when you pull the camera out to take some snap shots of the local nudes?


  4. shane says:

    I would put it to you that the strapping nude is an archaic design which can only look appropraite in a city which has no sense of it’s place in the world. Like the London rebuilding in classic Greek and French, after their shanty town burnt down in the great fire, or the yanks building their big Roman Columns everywhere. It’s not only comparing yourself to the great civilisations in history, it’s doing so without realising the irony that to copy a great artist goes against the very purpose of the art itself.

    It takes a certain level of wankiness, that you can only find in Melbourne, to think that putting classical Greek nudes in front of an apartment building is anything more than something they would get up to in a Kath & Kim sketch. It’s gold spray paint on a grander scale.

    Now, I would further put it to you, that to find the modern day equivalent of the style of sculpture that they are replicating here, you have to go no further than Fremantle and a certain statue of Bon Scott. The tight trousers are very confronting when viewed from ground level and subject matter, a punk from Perth who started a daggy Rock n Roll band, that rose to international stardom, and died in the gutter with a lung full of spew, goes against every popular idea the twentieth and twentyfirst centuries have created for public sculpture.

    Perhaps in a thousand years, somewhere in wanky Space Melbourne, some over priced inner city astro apartment block will be trying to copy the tight jeans and drunken swagger of that particular statue.


  5. David Cohen says:

    She looks like a young Bart Cummings for me.


  6. G'day from WA says:

    I, too, always try for a penis in my self-portraits.


  7. Bag O'Turnips says:

    I’m off to Bleak City tomorrow, not just to gain my sustenance of kulcha that Perth even cannot supply, but on patrol for Worsts Of Melbourne.

    No doubt they have their own quotient of Worsts, particularly in the interminable outer South Eastern sprawl, home to the “rool” Kaths and Kims that give Melbourne something of a reputation of being a bogan mecca, despite it simultaneously being Australia’s hive for hipster arty wankers like Yours Truly (NOT “trooly”!). Nah, there’s probably too a veritable shitload of Worsts in tossrag enclaves I like to frequent like Brunswick, Lygon, Acland, Chapel and Carlisle Streets and Commercial Road.

    To paraphrase that city’s other favourite sons (most likely sons, anyway), TISM, yet again referencing somebody else (to whom, escapes my mind at present), we are all of us are in the gutter here in Melbourne, but some of us are looking at the sewage.


  8. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    This Nonda Katsalidis may know architecture but over here in WA we know dongers – Pinder Surprise anyone – ?
    The Pinder would suggest that we Sandgropers are at the cutting edge of the use of a “dude” in the built environment.


    • Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

      As is typical of architects, the adonis-type dude should be shown rampant so you would have somewhere practical to hang your shopping bags while looking for your keys to enter the building.


      • Bag O'Turnips says:

        Barnett Rubble would ban that. Or at least hose it down with chilled desal water on the one allocated watering day per week.


  9. Charles Jhey says:

    Hahaha loved that ive sexually assaulted the male statue… ^^^


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