And Quiet Flows The Dong

The boys know what you’re giving
You give the boys such a lot of fun
And by the way you make a living
You’ve got the boys all on the run
S.T.’s showing gotta get them going
You can even say the price
They’ll wanna try it
even wanna buy it
If you really treat them nice
But I’d rather take you show that I can make you
Good enough for just one man
oh I’m feeling kinda
Like I’ve gotta find a way to make you understand. Status Quo. Mystery Song.

I make no meaning for this juxtaposition. Let’s just say that the meaning lies in a surfeit of good material. (A problem not encountered by say Inside Cover). However, if someone wants to come up with some adult songs which include the following elements,

Patsy Biscoe – Krazy Kym from Charlottes Web (shown actual size) – Onga Pumps, then bring it on. (Photos via Krazy Kym’s trophy husband, David Cohen, DFOC).


About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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46 Responses to And Quiet Flows The Dong

  1. Grrr says:

    I think I have that Patsy Biscoe LP somewhere. Hard to say without seeing the front. Patsy is Not Worst.

    I’m still perplexed by the Onga Pump Shop selling records.


  2. skink says:

    oh, I see now why we get the endless Charlotte’s Web references.

    bit of a slowie, me.


  3. shazza says:

    Patsy was born in India, grew up in Sydney, then moved to Tassie. Not sure what the TWOP relevance is? But like Grrr I vote not worst.


    • Frank Calabrese says:

      Speaking of Patsy, I’ve just downloaded her 1966 Folk Album which is excellent and proves that she indeed has the voice.

      You can download it from here:

      (Frank, I’m not sure whether that is a legal download site, so have removed it just in case).


  4. David Cohen says:

    What a total hornbag!


  5. Lazy Aussie says:

    Should I know what Status Quo meant by
    “S.T.’s showing gotta get them going”?


    • shazza says:

      TLA I suspect that is the Mystery of the song. In undertaking a quick search of the official SQ website there is a thread dedicated to this song yet not one mention of the mysterious S.Ts.

      Perhaps the fans don’t want to admit they haven’t cracked the riddle yet either.


  6. Groucho says:

    If you want to know about the songs on the R Certificate album…follow this link

    I think most of Patsy’s childrens songs could have a double meaning, especially these off her album 50 Favourite Nursery Rhymes (Vol 1)
    – Ride A Cock Horse
    – Wee Willie Winkie
    – Humpty Dumpty
    – Piggy Wig And Piggy Wee
    – Golden Slumbers
    ………and much much more


  7. David Cohen says:

    I think for the TWOP party at the Queens we’ll persuade Krazy Kym to re-form Charlotte’s Web and they’ll play all their songs, but also R-rated versions of Patsy.

    By the end of the night we’ll barely be able to see the stage for the herring smoke.


  8. The burnt shell of the Gilly might be nice for that event. A fundraiser.


  9. Frank Calabrese says:

    Patsy’s deceased Partner was the Soth Australian Fat Cat and is featured getting dressed by Patsy on Wayne Anthony’s websoite (he was Humbold The clown)


  10. And to think I dubbed her “Krazy” Kym before I even knew she played the cello! She might as well have a hatstand. Diagnosis confirmed.


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