Mt Dudmore

…and I can see clearly
from my diamond eyes,
I’m going to the mountain with the Property Council
no-one will accept all of me
so the Fire…will stop
The Gun Club

Astonishing in concept and ineptitude, even for free graphic design, this is perhaps the worst example I have ever seen. If you have an event with 3 speakers, why choose a design that requires 4 heads? Or is Roosevelt expected to speak as well? It’s like the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, with Brett, Luke, Ian – AND pestilence.

Then having chosen the design why paste square pics with no attempt to make them fit? And then go in a new direction, 3 Wise Men that actually fits the number of your participants?  Bento found this one, but was not sure if it was worst worthy. You bet you boiled cuntkini it is Bento. (BTW phrases Boiled cuntkini, and beaver damming (c) Cookster.)

This is the Andre Rieu of Graphic design.

I’d like to see some reps from the Australian Graphic design Association take part in the question and answer session.  “Why weren’t  comic sans and papyrus fonts used on alternate lines?” “Brett Wilkins’ chin? Why?” “Why didn’t you shift Ian Armstrong to the right so he could have had Lincoln’s beard?” “My eyes! Why have you soiled my eyes?” “What’s my Subi pied a terre worth?”

It is, of course, being held at the temple of worst The Hyatt. Well of course it is.

presidents

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
This entry was posted in worst advertising, worst graphic design and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

64 Responses to Mt Dudmore

  1. Grrr says:

    How could anyone suggest this isn’t a worst.

    Has the bottom of the real estate market fallen on such hard times?

    And just why does the WA Property Council have three such short-lived presidents? Do three presidents make not a democracy but a Junta? Will people be disappeared? What does Milton Friedman have to do with all of this? Can Skink whip something up better, or does he work exclusively with Perth journalists?

    What manner will the “interaction” take? Are they really wise?
    And if they are three wise men: why not go with a baby Jesus theme?

    What’s with the Property Council logo. To me it suggests an observatory… are there connections with Freemasons?

    And how much IS the lunch?

    Like

  2. Rolly says:

    It just about says everything about the social/personal values of property traders.
    Crude, rude and bloody vulgar.
    Parasites all.

    Like

  3. David Cohen says:

    Come on Grrr:

    You didn’t ask:

    How can it be a presidential view if there are three of them? Why aren’t we getting the presidents in between 2000 and 2005? Why is the distinction ‘lie ahead’ used? Will Brian Burke be there? What will be the nature of the interaction? Don’t they mean ‘interfacing’?

    Like

  4. Snuff says:

    So many questions, TLA. If it starts at 12.30pm, what happens at 12.15pm ?

    Like

  5. If I know the Hyatt, (and I do), there will be several minutes of standing round eating little snacks.

    Like

  6. Cookster says:

    Little snacks? What miniature boiled cuntkini stuffed with an octopus seafood medley?

    Like

  7. David Cohen says:

    Snacks! Yum. I’m booking right now.

    I’m feeling charitable: I can’t see any mention of the WA Division Lunch on the PC site – perhaps the flyer had to be done at the last minute.

    The PC do a lot of events: I like the look of the ‘Affair to Remember’ next week:

    ‘For the first time in Perth, members of the property industry will come together to recognise their peers, honour industry icon – Mr LS Perron AM and celebrate success in one fun-filled evening.

    ‘Stepping away from the traditional Awards night, winners of the 2009 WA Innovation & Excellence Awards will be announced, together with a tribute to industry icon Stan Perron for his lifetime contribution to the property industry in Western Australia.

    ‘A strictly black-tie event with premium food, wine and entertainment, this new look night of nights will be an affair to remember.’

    Like

  8. It will be snacks, sit down at round tables, intro, hear the three wise men of the apocalypse, probably during the meal, then T&A, I mean Q&A.

    Like

  9. This is not what you’d choose to do if you had to do a flyer at the last minute. 3pics (and Roosevelt) with the text.

    Like

  10. Bento says:

    Actually Rolly, Luke Saraceni is quite a nice chap. I’m not too familiar with the others, but I don’t know that you can draw too many conclusions as to their personal values based on the graphic design choices of a junior clerk at an organisation they no longer work for.

    Clearly, I misunderestimated the depth of feeling on this one. The more I look at it, the more shit it becomes. Note – the horizontal blue lines are not a scanning error, but were a feature of the original.

    Being a PC event, I suspect the cuntkini will in fact be sauteed with rosemary jus, and a side of polenta. Lamentably, the Jacob’s Creek chardonnay will probably beat out the Wolves as the vin du jour.

    Like

  11. Polenta. Thanks for reminding me. Worst food. No wonder the Italians were so grateful when Polo brought back pasta. They’d been trying to force down that disgusting polenta sludge for centuries.

    Like

  12. My Ning says:

    I seem to recall Mr LA taking photos of somebody’s briefcase during a Hyatt conference break circa 1994.

    The chairman over the two days was a thickset guy complete with a beard and heavy (deep) Scandanavian accent. We wondered what the local prozzies throught of him.

    Then there was another Swiss guy talking to a female Australian delegate over coffee.

    “Ya, if you come to Switzerland you should visit the Matterhorn,” he told her.

    We were waiting for him to then say: “I’ve got the only horn that matters”, but Mr LA was distracted by another suitcase.

    We ended up shooting two days of this on VHS. It’s never even occured to me until now to wonder whether any one has sat down to edit it or even watch it.

    Like

  13. Yes, I remember that. Some sort of law or punishment conference I think. To clarify, one delegate asked if we could photograph him while he spoke, which we did, but I also filled some of the rest of his film roll with bare photographs of briefcases to give him puzzlement and delight when processed back in South America.

    Like

  14. According to the West Saraceni’s WACA tower development has died in the arse.

    Like

  15. Rolly says:

    Bento sed

    “Actually Rolly, Luke Saraceni is quite a nice chap. I’m not too familiar with the others, but I don’t know that you can draw too many conclusions as to their personal values based on the graphic design choices of a junior clerk at an organisation they no longer work for.”

    I didn’t say that.
    I meant to infer that the poor quality and lack of integrity *reflected* the social and personal values of people in that “field of endeavour”.
    Hitler was also frequently described as being a pleasant and entertaining man, so I hardly think that the social graces of an individual necessarily give a true indication of the true character.
    My comment was, in any case, directed at the industry as a whole and not at any individual in particular and I maintain my total distaste for the industry’s raison d’etre in much the same way as I do for financial speculators of all kinds.

    Like

  16. Bento says:

    Got it. You weren’t saying those 3 specific individuals have suspect personal values, you were only saying anyone involved in property (the industry as a whole) has suspect personal values. I will make a note of it.

    Like

  17. David Cohen says:

    Rolly is expert at unscrambling the eggs after they’ve been mixed into an omelette.

    Like

  18. Bento says:

    Every time Rolly unrings a bell, an angel gets its wings.

    Like

  19. skink says:

    well I’ll say it. I have worked with Saraceni, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    lord help us if he and his ilk get free rein over Perth, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
    xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Skink, skink, skink… Do you want my cufflinks and my kahunas revoked? TLA

    Like

  20. Rolly says:

    David Cohen sed

    “Rolly is expert at unscrambling the eggs after they’ve been mixed into an omelette.”

    Not really Outrage, just wish that folks would read what’s written, rather than jumping in when they perceive that something has been said that questions, or in this case directly contradicts, their own viewpoint.

    You might have noticed by now that I’m a bit of a champion of the underdog and have a strong antipathy to usury and profiteering.

    But I do make a mean, mean, omelette when the fancy takes me. (And the chooks are laying.)

    Viva il B.A.B

    Like

  21. skink says:

    and back to the bushfires: I think Frank made a joke about John Williamson, but I was trapped in the airport this morning forced to watch a news mash-up showing victims and firecrews and toasted koalas cut with Johnno singing ‘True Blue’ and a fluttering Australian flag.

    how come a natural disaster somehow becomes an outpouring of patriotic jongoism, which in turn fuels paranoia and xenophobia and the bizarre concept of ‘forest jihad’?

    did anyone find out how many banjos were destroyed in the fire?

    Like

  22. Bento says:

    Skink – you know full well any lesser country would’ve packed up and abandoned everything it stood for in the face of such adversity.

    Like

  23. Rolly says:

    skink sed:

    “how come a natural disaster somehow becomes an outpouring of patriotic jongoism, which in turn fuels paranoia and xenophobia and the bizarre concept of ‘forest jihad’?”

    Could it be that, in order to increase their ‘ratings’ they pitch to the lowest common denominator.

    On ABC radio 720 this morning, Geoff Hutchinson had a couple of news editors (Ch9 and Worst newspaper, I think) justifying the crap over-sensationalised coverage that the mainstream media had been pumping out for the last week.

    It was like listening to a couple of year 5 school boys trying to explain why they’d torn the legs off a mouse they’d caught.

    Like

  24. Bento says:

    I heard Geoff say ‘arse’ on air this morning, too. I wish Backchat was still on ABC, let me tell you.

    Like

  25. Frank Calabrese says:

    and back to the bushfires: I think Frank made a joke about John Williamson, but I was trapped in the airport this morning forced to watch a news mash-up showing victims and firecrews and toasted koalas cut with Johnno singing ‘True Blue’ and a fluttering Australian flag.

    And he sang said ditty in front of the survivors at Whittlesea during the Ch 9 Bushfire Telethon as well. That song sold more copies than his debut single Old Man Emu FFS and the latter was at least had some sort of novelty value.

    Like

  26. Rolly says:

    Bento sed

    “…. I wish Backchat was still on ABC, let me tell you.

    There’s always MediaWatch, if you feel like being righteous.
    I though the expression was quite appropriate in the context of the multitude of volunteers “..working their arses off.”

    Ever tried it??

    Like

  27. Orbea says:

    mindless jingo-ism is un-Australian

    Like

  28. skink says:

    “abandoned everything it stood for ” ?

    were the fires some sort of attack on liberty and democracy?

    much as I admire and respect the firefighters and the individual acts of bravery and compassion of volunteeers, I don’t understand the jump to it being some sort of demonstration of national character, as if somehow citizens of ‘lesser’ nations would have behaved differently.

    no doubt the citizens of Gaza will be watching intently, hoping to learn how to act nobly in adversity.

    Like

  29. Rolly says:

    Frank sed:

    “And he sang said ditty in front of the survivors at Whittlesea during the Ch 9 Bushfire Telethon as well. That song sold more copies than his debut single Old Man Emu FFS and the latter was at least had some sort of novelty value.”

    And he sang as he shat on the feelings of the victims there,
    You’ll come a-ratings promoting with me.

    Like

  30. Bento says:

    No one loves pettiness more than me (I?), but I see MediaWatch as being the forum for serious media commentary and criticism (with some pettiness). Backchat was where you went when you didn’t like Geraldine Doogue’s haircut, or if Peter Holland said ‘bloody’, making one choke on one’s Milk Arrowroot.

    Work my arse off?? Are you kidding?? That’s what we have an immigration policy for.

    Like

  31. Rolly says:

    Bento sed

    “Skink – you know full well any lesser country would’ve packed up and abandoned everything it stood for in the face of such adversity.”

    Jingoistic bullshit, Bento.

    You really do need to get out and about and educate yourself.

    Did you read anything about the fires in Greece a couple of years ago?
    People with no equipment and little water using their bare hands to try to save a neighbour’s home.
    There are good people everywhere, just as there are some full-time shit heads in this country.

    Like

  32. Bento says:

    It was sarcasm Rolly.

    Like

  33. Rolly says:

    And it miss-fired badly, Bento.

    Like

  34. Rolly says:

    Oh! Dear!
    That pun was entirely unintentional :-(

    Like

  35. David Cohen says:

    Bento, skink – behave. In times of national crisis, the national irony button is retracted.

    Fret not – it will re-appear in a week or so.

    In the meantime you are being needelessly provocative with your metrosexual slurs.

    If you had been carried to safety and a Vegemite sandwich on Simpson’s donkey after being rescued from the HMAS Sydney thanks to a cockie rigging up a device from a Hills Hoist you’d be singing a different tune and not coming the raw prawn, let me tell you…

    Like

  36. Bento says:

    I thought it was pretty obviously sarcasm. Surely only Geof Parry could say something like that with a straight face. Still, skink apparently missed it too, so I guess not.

    Anyway – clearly Rolly & I give each other the shits, but that’s probably pretty boring for the rest of youse.

    Why DID they pick a design requiring 4 heads for 3 speakers?

    Like

  37. skink says:

    I was in the jolly Pilbara yesterday, and incountered two worst’s that I did not have opportunity to photograph:

    firstly a T-shirt for sale which read:

    “Do you FIFO in the Pilbara?: Fit in or F*** Off.”

    and secondly I ordered a coffee in the august establishment where I was staying, and was promptly handed a chipped brown mug with some brown dust in the bottom of it, and pointed in the direction of hot water and milk.

    I asked: “can I get a latte?” and was given a withering look that suggested that the lady had little understanding of latte-sipping metrocentric twat irony.

    Like

  38. skink says:

    jeez, what’s going on with my spelling and punctuation?

    two days in the dust and not only have the apostrophes gone walkabout, but my irony detector is on the blink

    Like

  39. David Cohen says:

    Where’s the Cookster today? I am missing his inflammatory remarks.

    He must be doing some actual work.

    Like

  40. irony detectors only go “on the fritz”, gaydar goes on the blink.
    Cookster had a quick comment earlier on.

    Like

  41. Grrr says:

    “Why DID they pick a design requiring 4 heads for 3 speakers?”

    I wonder if it has anything to do with the Case of the Missing Years?

    Was whomever has in charge of the PC between 00/05 supposed to be there? Was their wisdom so unconventional, so confronting they were dropped off at the last minute?

    And which of those people has inflicted the Worst Architectural crime on Perth?

    And, on the theme: Did John Williamson set the Gippsland fires so he’d have a change to sing ‘True Blue’ again?

    “did anyone find out how many banjos were destroyed in the fire?”

    Steady on! It’s Gippsland, not Adelaide/Tasmania/Halls Creek/. Fewer inbreds per sq km.

    Like

  42. skink says:

    censored again!

    I didn’t think that what I said about She-Ra was that libellous.

    LA: I think your crush is starting to cloud your judgement.

    Patti should realise that all she needs to do to silence criticism on this site is to invite LA to tea and show him the silverware.

    Like

  43. Frank Calabrese says:

    [Patti should realise that all she needs to do to silence criticism on this site is to invite LA to tea and show him the silverware.]

    Speaking of Peppermint Patti, she is talking about the Victorian Fires and has repled to a few more comments on the cyber-stalking post where she recommends offenders be banned from using any computer, anywhere.

    Good luck :-)

    Like

  44. Bento says:

    Grr – Evidently Theodore Roosevelt was President of the PC between 2000-2005.

    Oh, the Weekend At Bernie’s-style antics there were – Teddy Roosevelt getting hit in the groin by Alannah, Teddy Roosevelt getting hit in the groin by EPRA, Teddy Roosevelt getting hit in the groin by the Northbrdge Link…

    Like

  45. Did teh Paul Nurry really reply to her, or were you just damming my beaver outrage?

    Like

  46. skink says:

    Patti says:

    “For those hosting blogs, perhaps the moderator/host should be criminally responsible for facilitating/encouraging/assisting cyberbullying comments to be posted. That way, there is some control on responsible behaviour. Freedom/liberty carries responsibility/ownership.”

    does this explain the sudden increase in censorship?

    I must say it is odd that she still protestss that posts are anonymous: all posts on Fairfax must leave and address, as they do here, so it would not take long to track down the perp, or maybe just write to them and invite them to tea.

    Like

  47. Bento says:

    See why I fear the country, Rolly? A short stint in the outback, and skink can barely mash out a coherent sentence.

    Like

  48. Frank Calabrese says:

    I must say it is odd that she still protestss that posts are anonymous: all posts on Fairfax must leave and address, as they do here, so it would not take long to track down the perp, or maybe just write to them and invite them to tea.

    Although one can put in a fake email address like pattichog@sillylawyers.com and it would allow you to post, but the killer is the IP address which can be traced back to a particular machine/user.

    Like

  49. Frank Calabrese says:

    To illustrate my point, this is what happened when I sent a test email to the “email address” I posted :-)

    This Message was undeliverable due to the following reason:

    Your message was not delivered because the destination computer was
    not found. Carefully check that it was spelled correctly and try
    sending it again if there were any mistakes.

    It is also possible that a network problem caused this situation,
    so if you are sure the address is correct you might want to try to
    send it again. If the problem continues, contact your friendly
    system administrator.

    Host sillylawyers.com not found.

    The following recipients did not receive this message:

    Please reply to
    if you feel this message to be in error.

    Reporting-MTA: dns; nskntmtas04p.mx.bigpond.com
    Arrival-Date: Fri, 13 Feb 2009 06:03:57 +0000
    Received-From-MTA: dns; nskntotgx03p.mx.bigpond.com (124.182.142.103)

    Final-Recipient: RFC822;
    Action: failed
    Status: 5.1.2
    Remote-MTA: dns; sillylawyers.com

    Like

  50. skink says:

    I think you are right Bento,
    I seem to have mislaid about 20 I.Q. points somewhere in the bush
    imagine what would happen if you stayed for any length of time.

    I’m never going back, in case I end up driving a ute with flags.

    I went into a roadhouse, and godstruth, I was the only person in there not wearing a blue singlet.

    Like

  51. Frank Calabrese says:

    I think you are right Bento,
    I seem to have mislaid about 20 I.Q. points somewhere in the bush
    imagine what would happen if you stayed for any length of time.

    I’m never going back, in case I end up driving a ute with flags.

    I went into a roadhouse, and godstruth, I was the only person in there not wearing a blue singlet.

    And they become National Voters :-)

    Like

  52. Rolly says:

    Bento sed

    “See why I fear the country, Rolly? A short stint in the outback, and skink can barely mash out a coherent sentence.”

    A-a-h!
    The sheer delicacy of Metrocentric Twats (©Rolly2008)
    Poor dears can’t take exposure to life in the raw.

    skink sed

    “I think you are right Bento,
    I seem to have mislaid about 20 I.Q. points somewhere in the bush….”

    50% I.Q. deterioration is quite normal, skink, when confronted with the need for self sufficiency.
    Take away your urban props for a while and you collapse into quivering heaps.

    Like

  53. skink says:

    had I realised there was no decent coffee in the outback, I would have indeed been self-sufficient and taken my own espresso machine. It’s quite portable.

    Like

  54. Bento says:

    Next time, there’s probably no need to pack your skinny tie and stretch jeans, either.

    Like

  55. David Cohen says:

    What about the jolly singalongs besides the camp-fires, skink? Were you able to teach them the words to The Internationale? Country-dwellers are, after all, “convicts of hunger”.

    Like

  56. skink says:

    I did, and right now they are marching on Adelaide to lynch Xenophon whilst shouting “show me the money”

    Like

  57. poor lisa says:

    Just to say poor Bento I got it right away and I liked it.

    Natural disasters tend to get treated the same as a grand final or an olympic medal win, but to be fair I don’t think that’s unique to Australia.

    Also that flyer was knocked up by a bored junior level clerical temp and it’s not the junior clerk’s fault, it’s whover at the Property Council thought it was ok to use and approved it going out. These people are paid enough to know not to that comic sans & papyrus should be used on alternate lines, the junior clerk is not.

    Like

  58. Bento says:

    I can always count on you poor lisa. All that polluted city air brings you down to my level.

    Like

  59. poor lisa says:

    Sorry can you say that again? I didn’t quite catch it cos the 6.21 to Ashfield & the 21 to Morley both just went past at the same time as Guns n Roses came onstage at the waca & the glory failed to score.

    Like

  60. Frank Calabrese says:

    This is the Andre Rieu of Graphic design.

    Just heard on Today Tonight that Andre will be donating the roayalties of a new song to the Bushfire Appeal.

    /me rolls eyes

    Like

  61. David Cohen says:

    Men with hair like microwaved palm trees are beasts.

    Like

  62. Cookster says:

    Is it mum or dad, is it ‘Kanga’ Rieu? Hey true blue…

    Just say you’ve knocked off for some herring, and you’ll be back in your cuntkinis later on…

    Hey true blue…

    Like

  63. The Legend 101 says:

    What the hell.

    Like

  64. swamp fairy says:

    oh guys…..cmon really????????? but if u must oh dont stop! moutains of fiodder seriously

    Like

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