Xmas be done

Christmas, like facebook is over. Kensington.


About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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11 Responses to Xmas be done

  1. Looks like Santa has sagy borls


  2. David Cohen says:

    What’s the message on the back? Santa Flop Here?


  3. Rolly says:

    I’m feeling pretty well deflated over the whole thing myself.
    There were at least two serious confrontations between tenants in the adjacent block of flats one of which saved me the unpleasant task of calling the cops to get the young alcoholic concerned to reduce the volume of noise emanating from his DJ style sound set-up.
    Rap, in small doses, is sort of OK. It can’t really be defined as music, but it does have a certain poetry about it.
    Played late into the night with the bass boosted to the max, sounding rather akin to a iron foundry forge with serious maintenance deficiencies, it becomes rather unsettling as the cacophony reverberates between the parallel frontages of two blocks of units, separated only by the width of the two adjacent driveways.
    At 06:30 on Xmas morning it has the same effect as pointy-heads playing the tin drums and toy synthesisers just freed of the wrapping paper and packaging which was so laboriously (and even possibly lovingly) effected as little as two hours previously, accompanied by several beers, glasses of wine and the remains of the bottle of port opened for the benefit of Santa on his nocturnal deliveries.
    Needless to say, the neighbours were not impressed and a ding-dong session of verbal abuse and threats with empty beer bottles ensued. Just a couple got broken – on the bitumen in my driveway. So far there has been no apology nor serious attempt at removing the shards.
    It’s all seasonal hypocrisy, of course; the complainants are well known to the local fuzz as recidivist late night revelers. No doubt the early hour of the day was just too much for their aching heads. A couple of hours of cranially befuddled sleep is insufficient for even the most hardened party animal to regain a sense of bonhomie toward their less-than-considerate co-habitant.
    New Year’s Eve will undoubtedly bring on an amplified repeat
    of the circumstances.
    Bah! Humbug! With any luck, next year will see me East of Eucla and well off the beaten track.
    Peace on Earth and Goodwill to all ??
    There’s about as much chance of that as there is of there not being another world financial meltdown after the next global stock market bubble.


  4. Bento says:

    Geez Rolly, got any stories about the war you’d like to share with us?


  5. Rolly says:

    To which particular war would you be referring Bento ?


  6. Rolly that sounds more like Maylands than Dumby.


  7. David Cohen says:

    Post-Xmas haiku:

    The elves are on strike:
    Higher wages next year
    Please, or yellow snow.


  8. Snuff says:

    If it’s Monday, this must be Okinawa. Just checking in, TLA, and good to see the worst is still as worst as ever. Onya.


  9. B.T. says:

    No comment. Just wanted to see if my whatchamacallit still works.


  10. B.T. says:

    On second thought, I do have a comment. Rolly, can’t you just shoot the noise making bastards? Isn’t that what rap is all about? Popping a cap in someone’s ass?


  11. The Legend 101 says:

    Im house 10 my neighbours are house 8 where the only two houses that had christmas lights in the front yard this year. Someone i know has stacks of them but one day some stupid kids came and popped there blow up santa and put in the mailbox.


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