Weekend Worstoff 32

A lite weekend worstoff, as I am on international duties, but Vic Demised sent a sobering look at globalisation. Transport costs from Wanneroo are pretty high. They don’t save money by fertilising their own crops either. All that goodness being wasted down the sewers.Did anyone catch Vic doing comedy last week?

Ai ya!

Ai ya!

And globalisation may also be to blame for this guy having to wear plastic bags on his feet. Or is it global warming that we can blame for his lack of water resistant boots?

bagfoot2

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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34 Responses to Weekend Worstoff 32

  1. Vic Demised says:

    “Did anyone catch Vic doing comedy last week?”
    -Alas, LA, it was the comedy comeback that wasn’t. I stupidly started a new anti-depressant on Tuesday night and spent Wednesday in a state of confusion and mild panic. Performance anxiety overcame me. Apologies to my legion of loyal fans. When my serotonin levels out in a month or so I will try again -if The Laugh Resort will let me.

    That motorcyclist’s plastic bags seem to be in dangerous proximity to his exhaust pipe, risking meltdown and the release of dangerous hydrocarbons. He should have worn the plastic bags inside his boots.

    Like

  2. Rolly says:

    Dangerous things, these SRI’s.
    My GP has tried a few on me to, supposedly, relieve chronic, exercise exacerbated, pain.
    The trouble is that they have universally augmented rafts of the other symptoms of CFS.
    Nice as the bloke is, I said to him that it might be wiser to leave the prescribing of reality bending chemicals to those specialising in the field.
    I *think* he took it on board.

    Like

  3. Snuff says:

    Did you get to A-Maze-N-Golf Hanmer Springs Gold Rush Mini Golf and Lost Temple Maze, TLA ?

    Avagoodweegend.

    Like

  4. erinstark says:

    That’s the second Douglas Ave worst I’ve seen. What’s with that damn street (it also features the wonderful front-yard hand sculpture)?

    Like

  5. Snuff no, I didn’t, but wished I had. I did have the worst fucken pizza I’ve ever had though. The woman in the shop was so nice that I foolishly didn’t take a pic of the pie congealing in the bin and post it.

    Like

  6. Snuff says:

    Condolences on the pizza, TLA, but that country charm can no doubt beguile even the most diligent worsthunter.

    As it happens, I had one of the best I’ve ever had in Ginza last night, and for the sum of only a moderately sized third world country. First prize, however, still goes to Angie’s Pizza in Cambridge Street, Leederville, over 20 years ago. Angie’s can’t possibly still be there, can it ?

    Like

  7. Snuff says:

    You’d think I would have learnt by now to google before I ask, TLA.

    Angie’s seems alive and well, albeit in Wembley, not Leederville. If it’s even half as good as it was, it’s definitely not worst.

    Like

  8. poor lisa says:

    Even comedians are on SSRI’s? Now i really feel depressed.

    Like

  9. Rolly says:

    Dear poor lisa,
    Think on: Michael Bentine, Tony Hancock, Spike Milligan, Eric Sykes, Peter Sellers, Hattie Jaques, et.al, in continuum, ad nauseum, et cetera and so forth.
    And that’s only a few from the Eastern shores of the “pond”.

    Like

  10. poor lisa says:

    Yeah but they were just depressed dysfunctional human beings who self medicated with enjoyable drugs, they weren’t on SSRI’s.

    Like

  11. Cookster says:

    @ Snuff – I have had issues with Angie’s and would definitely put it up there as a worst.

    It was my local when I was living in West Leedervile and they made a half decent pizza, but the trouble was the bastards were never open.

    Every time that we decided it was pizza night was the night that Angie’s decided not to open. It wasn’t a case of it being closed Mondays or any set day, it was just a random thing.

    One night I dropped in to place an order and was pleasantly surprised to find the joint open. But not so happy when the bloke told me ‘sorry, closed for renovations.’

    I now frequent Cambridge Pizza, also on Cambridge Street but at the Paris end. The Turkish joint at Herdies isn’t bad either.

    Like

  12. Snuff says:

    Fair enough, Cookster. That doesn’t sound so flash, although I guess never being open wouldn’t have been so bad had the pizzas been Hanmer Springs standard. My experiences there were the stuff of antiquity too, so I stand corrected.

    [There may also be some apostrophic issues.]

    Like

  13. Cookster says:

    Is it just me, or did pizza taste a fuck site better when I was drunk, stoned and 18??? Remember those nights when you would hook into the pizza after a big night out, tearing the flesh from the roof of your mouth as you tried to edge out your mates for the ‘spare’ slice?

    Like

  14. Rolly says:

    “Yeah but they were just depressed dysfunctional human beings who self medicated with enjoyable drugs, they weren’t on SSRI’s.”
    Not so, dear poor liza. They were all undergoing psychiatric treatment. Maybe not SSRI’s specifically.

    Like

  15. Vic Demised says:

    poor lisa -there are plenty more comedians who could be added to Rolly’s list, including some in Perth. It seems often to come with the territory. I don’t think I’m actually depressive by nature, but I ruptured some discs in my neck a couple of years ago and had some vertebrae fused. Pain, dysthaesia, lack of sleep and the endless frustrations of the workers compensation system have brought me to the brink.

    Like

  16. Bill O"Slatter says:

    Adroit and perceptive Poor Lisa. What is known about SSRi’s. very little : that is still a protocol. Big Pharma , as usual , only report positive results. I would suggest however that you don’t mix alcohol and SSRis and self medication of whatever drug is also a bad idea.

    Like

  17. Rolly says:

    “I would suggest however that you don’t mix alcohol and SSRis and self medication of whatever drug is also a bad idea.”
    Abso-bloody-lutely !!!

    Like

  18. poor lisa says:

    Yeah I didn’t mean to make light of depression & whatever treatment, it is a serious subject. SSRI’s are keeping people I know alive but it’s alarming how GP’s will dole them out to some people who just need to change their job or life or relationship.

    Like

  19. Rolly says:

    “…..but it’s alarming how GP’s will dole them out to some people who just need to change their job or life or relationship.”
    You’re spot on.
    The diagnosis of depression, which in my view should only be made after protracted examination and the exclusion of all other clinical possibilties, has been a convenient “catch-all” for unexplained and inexplicable symptoms for far too long.
    The association between existential depression (i.e. despair) and debility, pain and loss of social function is barely acknowledged let alone studied.
    Carers and paramedics know it by virtue of their field experiences, but mainstream “doctoring” seems to avoid the phenomenon and/or relegate it to the ‘too hard basket’.

    Like

  20. Vic Demised says:

    Rolly, I guess that makes me a too-hard-basket-case.

    I’d like to believe that my depression is circumstantial, rather than existential (though my three siblings have all been through the SSRI mill, so maybe there’s a genetic predisposition lurking in my chromosomes.)

    I’m hoping my problem is nothing that a $100K workers comp payment can’t cure -though negotiating that foetid medico-legal swamp adds further layers of depressing circumstance. Thankfully, I’m getting some strong support from my union, the LHMU. The Ed Dept’s “Employee Support Services” could have been given its title by Orwell.

    Like

  21. Frank Calabrese says:

    from the radioinfo.com.au newsletter.

    Former 94.5FM news director starts own magazine

    Amanda Walsh, formerly news director of Mix 94.5FM and 92.9FM and Kristen Watts, who was an editor and reporter with The West Australian, have kicked their conventional careers to the curb and invested in their new magazine called Silver.

    Two people from the Worst Newspaper and Worst FM Radio Station team up up to combine their worstness in a Magazine.

    I despair at the outcome.

    Like

  22. Bento says:

    Hopefully they’re/their/there media experience enables them to know a curb from a kerb.

    Like

  23. Sounds like some good material coming this way. First cover should be a close-up of Gary Shannon’s head.

    Like

  24. skink says:

    why is it called Silver?

    is it because they are good at coming second?

    perhaps it is named after Long John, and the first edition will have a fashion shoot with parrots and crutches

    ah -harr

    Like

  25. poor lisa says:

    Silver because in the usual manner of ‘free’ magazines around 50% of the content is probably going to consist of tiresome ads for western suburbs jewellers and their boringly tasteful bling.

    Like

  26. skink says:

    interesting that TWAT have run the same story about Silver magazine, with the same error, which suggests it was a press release from the magazine itself.

    it suggests they have ventured on new careers because they were crap journos who could write or sub.

    Like

  27. Frank Calabrese says:

    interesting that TWAT have run the same story about Silver magazine, with the same error, which suggests it was a press release from the magazine itself.

    it suggests they have ventured on new careers because they were crap journos who could write or sub.

    Skink, have you got a link ?

    Amanda Walsh has form in crapiness, ashe was one of the original members of the PMFM Morning Crew with Gary Shannon in the early 90’s when they went to FM, with that other radio shocker – Bernie “I was there when they tipped off a Drug Dealer” Britton.

    Like

  28. skink says:

    http://www.watoday.com.au/lifestyle/silver-magazine-goes-for-gold-20081125-6hct.html

    Amanda: the eighties called and they want their make-up back.

    is that the blended look?

    Like

  29. Frank Calabrese says:

    Amanda: the eighties called and they want their make-up back.

    And is Amanda trying to look like Brooke Vandenberg ?

    http://www.champagnecomedy.com/2006/01/

    Like

  30. Rolly says:

    “And is Amanda trying to look like Brooke Vandenberg ?”
    Or maybe just a bit trying….?

    Like

  31. skink says:

    more Nicole-bashing, this time courtesy of Danny Katz:

    “just put a pink marshmallow into a microwave for about a minute on high and watch it swell and bulge and pulsate and just seconds before it explodes, that’s the exact colour, sheen, texture and tautness of Nicole Kidman’s face.”

    Like

  32. Bento says:

    You know you’re in trouble when even Danny Katz brings his brand of tedious, simile-flogging repartee down on your head.

    Like

  33. skink says:

    although my normal response to Katz is “do people really pay you money for this, ‘cos yer not funny,” that one did make me smile

    Like

  34. Ljuke says:

    Amanda: Gosnells called, they want their trashy blonde back.

    Like

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