North by Southwest

The East End Bar, or should it be West End? Or Southend? In Fremantle, where the city remains directionless. If CY O’connor had used this compass, the Goldfields pipeline would be pumping water to Madagascar now. In any case you will be shipwrecked from arsehole to breakfast if you follow these directions. By Stu.north-east

About The Lazy Aussie

Commended Haiku writer. A lover of The West's Worst. Perth stand-up comedian, photographer and writer.
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27 Responses to North by Southwest

  1. siggamag says:

    This is actually the first time that I have laughed out loud… Oh dear what is happening in that land that was once my home….

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  2. siggamag says:

    just remembered why I never leave comments here… hate wordpress… more my problem than yours… but still… had to share

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  3. rong1 says:

    Strange compass … I thought West was to the left of North

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  4. Shazza says:

    Head meet desk.

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  5. rottobloggo says:

    Sheesh: Freo two days in a row. Gross favouritism.

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  6. Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    For many Freo residents this will not be an issue as they see the compass as a Western Judeo-Christian construct to constrain the time-space continuum. They are content to find their way around the port city using its colours and auras, sometimes being guided by friendly dolphins that make their way into the inner harbour. Others are content to put a “Magic Happens” sticker on their 1995 Ford Laser and simply take their chances.

    Everyone has the problem of trying to find a parking space on weekends. No amount of crystals in the ash tray seems to solve that problem.

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  7. scanners says:

    I don’t know whether it’s due to the crazy font, or the angle the photograph was taken at, or my eyesight, but I read that as The East Erd Bar. On their web site there’s a photo of a woman dancing with a snake and yet their blurb mentions the word “suave”. I don’t think Cary Grant would have drank at such an establishment.

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  8. Bento says:

    When Freo eventually declares war on Cockburn, I can only assume their fleet will miss Jervoise Bay, and their stiltwalking infantry will be slaughtered by Johnny Kwinana.

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  9. Anonymous says:

    If CY O’Conner can build a pipeline to Madagascar then why can’t we pump water from the Kimberly to Perth. They told him he’d never get the water to flow, they said he was crazy, they said his compass was busted but he proved them wrong and opened up the rich sapphire belt that built this country.

    We need a new CY O’Conner, with the vision to bring water from the Kimberly in the south all the way down to Perth in the east. Otherwise, this country is stuffed.

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