North by Southwest

Posted on July 26, 2013 by AHC McDonald

The East End Bar, or should it be West End? Or Southend? In Fremantle, where the city remains directionless. If CY O’connor had used this compass, the Goldfields pipeline would be pumping water to Madagascar now. In any case you will be shipwrecked from arsehole to breakfast if you follow these directions. By Stu.north-east

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About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
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27 Responses to North by Southwest

  1. siggamag's avatar siggamag says:
    July 26, 2013 at 7:13 am

    This is actually the first time that I have laughed out loud… Oh dear what is happening in that land that was once my home….

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  2. siggamag's avatar siggamag says:
    July 26, 2013 at 7:15 am

    just remembered why I never leave comments here… hate wordpress… more my problem than yours… but still… had to share

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  3. rong1's avatar rong1 says:
    July 26, 2013 at 7:20 am

    Strange compass … I thought West was to the left of North

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  4. Shazza's avatar Shazza says:
    July 26, 2013 at 8:12 am

    Head meet desk.

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  5. rottobloggo's avatar rottobloggo says:
    July 26, 2013 at 8:23 am

    Sheesh: Freo two days in a row. Gross favouritism.

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  6. Russell Woolf's Lovechild's avatar Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:
    July 26, 2013 at 8:38 am

    For many Freo residents this will not be an issue as they see the compass as a Western Judeo-Christian construct to constrain the time-space continuum. They are content to find their way around the port city using its colours and auras, sometimes being guided by friendly dolphins that make their way into the inner harbour. Others are content to put a “Magic Happens” sticker on their 1995 Ford Laser and simply take their chances.

    Everyone has the problem of trying to find a parking space on weekends. No amount of crystals in the ash tray seems to solve that problem.

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  7. scanners's avatar scanners says:
    July 26, 2013 at 8:45 am

    I don’t know whether it’s due to the crazy font, or the angle the photograph was taken at, or my eyesight, but I read that as The East Erd Bar. On their web site there’s a photo of a woman dancing with a snake and yet their blurb mentions the word “suave”. I don’t think Cary Grant would have drank at such an establishment.

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  8. Bento's avatar Bento says:
    July 26, 2013 at 12:12 pm

    When Freo eventually declares war on Cockburn, I can only assume their fleet will miss Jervoise Bay, and their stiltwalking infantry will be slaughtered by Johnny Kwinana.

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  9. Unknown's avatar Anonymous says:
    July 27, 2013 at 9:03 am

    If CY O’Conner can build a pipeline to Madagascar then why can’t we pump water from the Kimberly to Perth. They told him he’d never get the water to flow, they said he was crazy, they said his compass was busted but he proved them wrong and opened up the rich sapphire belt that built this country.

    We need a new CY O’Conner, with the vision to bring water from the Kimberly in the south all the way down to Perth in the east. Otherwise, this country is stuffed.

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