Back to back

I came here last week from down in Richmond
‘Cause Juddy left for Carlton on a train
I thought I’d get a game and just forget him
But in Richmond a broken heart is still the same.

I’ll ask the man behind the bar for the jukebox
And the music takes me back to old Subi
And when they ask who’s the tool in the corner, convulsing
I’ll say, little old West Coast wine cooler, me… Dean Martin

Inglewood steps up with another fine worst. What makes this an even classier object is the 1.5 litre capacity. Would have been nicer in a kerosene tin. I didn’t have a camera with me, and was going to pull the ad down, but I noticed the “do not remove” order, so left it. Only when I got to the car did I think, “What the fuck am I doing? I’m obeying orders from someone with a flagon of Eagles wine!” so I went back and ripped it down for your discernment.

Sorry Alex.

If anyone does actually want this abomination, I will send you Alex’s number.

About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
This entry was posted in worst of perth and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

34 Responses to Back to back

  1. David Cohen says:

    You fret too much: surely that is an admonishment TO Alex about removal.

    It did not say TLA – Do Not Remove, so I think you’re OK.


  2. Cimbali says:

    Alex should be grateful that you have increased his readership by several thousand. You should demand a percentage of the sale.


  3. rolly says:

    Yesterday’s tweet was all about writer’s crap; today’s is about not reading shit in the dunny.
    Coprophilia, TLA?


  4. Natalia Fan #1 says:

    Not that I can talk, but the fact that it’s a 1.5L bottle is a nice touch. Also that the signatures appear to be both printed and scrawled on the label.


  5. A Troy and Adele version would be nice. Maybe in a hemp bottle.


  6. Was on the same noticeboard that I found

    Mincing Versace a couple of years ago.


  7. Jaidyn-Jaxxon Taylor-Shanesmith says:

    Cab, Shiraz, Merlot
    Geddin the car ya lil’ shits!
    Goin ta Mackas


  8. orbea says:

    The image of Juddy and Cuz is reminiscent of that lugubriuos series from Viz – “Up the Arse Corner.” Not Viz but it gets the message across
    They’re both smiling Chris is giving Ben a reach around


  9. Bag O'Turnips says:

    I believe Alex would’ve had better luck flogging this to bogans—who love nothing more than a mass-produced one-off piece of irrelevant sporting memorabilia—through “Has-Beens and Dickheads”, at The Gonorrhoea in Morley. Not too much of a stagger or bus ride on the nº 21 from the Beaufort Arrondissement on Route 53.

    Do that and he should get a few more dollars than furtively hoping that it’ll sell on a pinup board!


  10. Bag O'Turnips says:

    Speaking of Morley and has-been AFL players, Laurie Keene (an inaugural WCE ruck) was a car dealer at McInerney (Mac-and-who?) Ford for a while. Also, I believe there was another player—can’t recall whom it was—who fell on the wrong side of the law and spent some time cooling his heels at Her Majesty’s pleasure. Upon release, he found himself working as a car detailer, as a part of his rehabilitation back into the community. Don’t know which club either he came either, but no doubt used Dennis McInerney’s connections to get this gig.

    So that’d be another piece of memorabilia to have: a slightly decrepit TF Cortina (Mk V for you limeys out there!) sold by nº25 and detailed (maybe install a free cock ‘n’ balls antenna) by God-knows-who-ex-jailbird.


  11. Jaidyn-Jaxxon Taylor-Shanesmith says:

    Surely ‘Alex’ is a pretty, um, wimpy name for a diehard AFL collector…


  12. Jaidyn-Jaxxon Taylor-Shanesmith says:

    ‘Back to back Brownlow’
    Unashamedly homo
    Visceral sex act


We can handle the worst

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s