To all the Bankwest staff. Here’s a message from the past, from before it became The Bankwest of Scotland. Start saving. As fast as you can. Didn’t Colin (asleep at the wheel) Barnett assure you your jobs were safe. “There will be NO, I repeat FEW sackings”.
bankwest
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The Asia Beat
The Worst of Perth 
The bank is open
To closing the door on you:
AT(elling)M(ontage).
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Watch out for skimmers:
They don’t empty your account,
You clear out your desk!
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Easy Bank arrows
Push my fucking buttons and
Rural my money.
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WordPress was ordered to put this up at 3am tomorrow not now! Stop looking at it until tomorrow. The machines have turned on me.
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Does this mean we get a special bonus Worst tomorrow?
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Ahh fuck.
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A chance would be a fine thing.
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Has Bankwest employed Patti Chong do do voiceovers of Sunflowers ?
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I said stop looking.
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Well take down the page then :-)
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Comments were already up. too late.
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Judgement Day on Teh Worst:
Terminate the funny-man.
Aussie Tug Merchant
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Needs a not worst tag too i’d say
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Haven’t seen your smiling face for a while para. I SAID don’t be a stranger/
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I was once so desperate to escape from the private school I was imprisoned at that I secretly applied for a job at the Rough and Ignorant, as my mate who later worked there used to call it. It went horrifyingly well until they knocked me back for being colourblind.
p.s. Looking forward to the bonus post.
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Remember when the R&I were sponsors of It’s Academic with Jeff “No 19 Mr Newman” a saying that he got lumbered for many years that he was pissed off by it ?
Seven briefly revived it in the 90’s, early 2000’s and of course Bankwest was the sponsor as well.
Can’t find either version, but here is the current incarnation for Primary School kids hosted by former Perthite Simon reeve.
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Could I have the question again please, Mr Calabrese ?
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I Tells Ya, we’ve just written a segment for Ch 7’s 50th Birthday Special – the Worst of TVW – come on LA, between myself, Vic Demised and your good self we could produce a great segment :-)
Your Mission, if you choose to accept it is to pitch this to Reece Whitby :-)
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What exactly do you want me to do?
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Contact Mr Whitby with the idea for a segment covering the not so great moments in TVW’s histroy, ie Fat Cat with a Rabbitt down his gob, Vic demised egging the Cat while Juggling, Anything Goes with Peter Dean & John Fryer, Martin & Watts Jenny Seaton’s various programs, Sattler’s attempts at Journalism :-)
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What, did Sooky try journalism at some time?
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I’m referring to his editorials and special reports on Today Tonight – plus his famous striptease in the Telethon Phone Room with Tony Murphy & Lionel Yorke
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Better off using the Party’s influence on Whitby , Frank and smuggle the pooper scooped blooper tape out for YouTube. I suspect however that Channel 7’s attitude to its history is much like Hitlers , all the many failures erased.
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I used to have a Beta tape of TVW 7’s 25 years of television, man I would kill to have that back again. There were some fucking great clips from “In Perth Tonight”. So bad it was good. They used to mime to hit records of the day. THAT was variety – screw GraGra and his ten piece orchestra and dancing girls.
I still have a tape of their 30 years of TV show, but that was piss weak, other than a screening of the first episode of Number 96 in its entirety.
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Actually it was Club 17 which had the miming to the Hits of the Day – I have some audio of Johnny Young counting down the Top 10 in 1965 and Kim Newman mimes Hang On Sloopy – it’s scoped (ie only the start and end are played)and it also features Johnny getting embarresed by a letter from a fan, and features 1 and a half numbers by the Spektors, eaturing Bon Scott on Drums – a bit of Yesterday, and the entire rendition of Gloria – got it in my collection of old airchecks from Steve Gordon.
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Of whom, Frank, it would be remiss of me not to again mention as at least one particularly notable exception to John Ryan’s observation below.
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I agree – Steve is the only decent broadcaster – even Bob Maumill is past his use by date – and his revelation of Rob Broadfield being the new Inside Cover editor was broken here first anyway – and he praised Paul Murray for having well researched articles ?
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What about Tony serve after midnight on 6PR? He seems a reasonable fellow.
Those on twitter can follow him. He’s
perthtones
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Tony’s not too bad though I do prefer his work on this :-)
I know the Cammera operator, he lives up the road and the some scenes were shot at his place :-)
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I followed Tony for a short while, seemed like a lovely fella. But then blocked him as he was getting in the way of the funnier twitters from Tim Minchin, Stephen Fry etal
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No, this was definitely IPT. Gary Carvolth and a few other people in dodgy turbans miming to a song called “Maharajah Of Pagador” (sp?)
Also another clip with Gary at the desk with special guest Mavis Bramston.
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Ahh, now I recall it – it was the 21st Birthday special from 1980 – that had lots of good clips that weren’t in the 30th Anniversary special hosted by Johnny Young, which I do have on tape.
The 21st Birthday one had interviews with former staffers as well.
Re Nuner 96, that was part of a series of late night specials on a Saturday Night hosted by Peter Dean, and included an episode of Spellbound with Martin St James and featured Max Kay doing an Al Jolson Medley, and Tod’s Dad Kevan and his female partner dancing to The Impossible Dream, complete with record skip.
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“Max Kay doing an Al Jolson Medley”
Seven words to strike fear into even the stoutest of hearts.
That sounds like possibly the greatest piece of television I’ve never seen.
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And I’ve got that episode on Video as well :-) Pity I don’t have a video capture card :-(
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Frank , DVB-T/analogs now < $100 ?
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Speaking of In Perth Tonight, here itr is mentioned by it’s Director Keith Mackenzie from the excellent WA Television History Page blog, set up for Seven’s 50th Anniversary.
http://watvhistory.com/2009/03/keith-mackenzie/
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Which was featured on tonight’s Ch 7 the First 50 years special.
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The revival of It’s Academic in the early Noughties was tragic. On the wide shot, the illuminated scores of the three teams were so piddly that you couldn’t even read them, thereby defeating the purpose of having a wide shot of the three schools in the first place. And Jeff Newman, gawd, what a fluffer. A couple of toe-curlingly embarrassing examples:
Jeff:
School kid:
Jeff: No, that’s incorrect (pause) sorry, that’s correct.
Jeff: You have sixty seconds to answer as many questions as you can. Are you ready? Your time starts… now! (clock starts ticking, five second pause)
And speaking of TVW 7 productions, what was that little game show segment Chris Mainwaring used to host in the 90s? There was a board of crappy flashing perspex squares illuminated from behind, and a contestant would press a button, whereupon a dated wooden kalimba gliss sound-effect would play, and the lights would stop on one of the squares. I used to turn the colour down on the TV set and, hey presto! Back to the 70s! Uncanny!
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I put some of the text in pointy brackets, that’s why gone all invisible, but you get the idea.
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I think most people would agree that TV Game Shows have long been a veritable pantheon of worst, ratbag23. However, if anyone can match Eva Nazemson for sheer professionalism, then I’ll go he.
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Can I buy an umlaut please, Eva?
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No.
Motörhead have them stockpiled in case of the Zombie Apocalypse.
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I still have one of these, in fact it’s right next to me
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Lucky bastard.
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Mine appears to have some knife work on the slot to get some 20c pieces out.
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Glad you said attempts Frank I think that applys to 6pr across the board
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I miss these machines.
They had a certain charm.
I had my R&I ATM card for years after the transition, then they stole it from me and lumbered me with some horrid blue card.
Got my new card last week, it’s some sort of horrid, limp sunset artwork.
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Grrr I received one of those horrid cards this week too. I knew the writing was on the wall once the Commonwealth Bank took over.
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PS: Where’s today’s post?
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This was today’s. WordPress published it early.
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Can I suggest then we open the West to P17 and bag out whoever decided to run an “Easter Egg Taste Test”?
Those six-year-olds are no Rob Broadfield. Hell, they’re not even Belle Taylor.
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Or the Good Friday fish recipe suggestions on page 16 – featuring prosciutto-wrapped fish – kind of defeats the purpose?
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Hee! Hee!
Silly Buggers.
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And why isn’t Barry Hickey and Sattler up in arms over the Western Farce playing Thugby at Subiaco Oval on Good Friday ? Yet they complain when people want to go to a movie or want the casino open.
Hypocrites.
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But Langtree’s is open, right?
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Pingback: Queens Hotel Bonus Post « The Worst of Perth
A question that has been bugging me all day:
Why ‘The bank that lives there’ and not ‘The bank that lived here’?
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Because the original slogan used by the bank for many years was “The Bank That Lives Here”.
Though why Bankwest didn’t check their Gaydar when they decided to use Go west to relaunch the bank remains a mystery, plus they had the gall to use a Boy soprano from the East – though the rest of the talent was from WA.
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I recall the original slogan…. and the japes about the Gay Octopus…. which was quite hilarious until BHP Billiton stole and flipped the GLAAD logo for their own.
And, in their defense, I didn’t realise ‘Go West’ was a gay anthem until well after the Pet Shop Boys did their cover.
But I’m still bitter we lost the R&I at all, and that Keating sold the Commonwealth.
Stupid Keating.
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Though it should noted that this is the second Village People song to suffer from a Gaydar Malfunction – the US Navy had produced and almost released a TV ad based on In The Navy, until they were advised about the inappropriateness of the song – it was the same with YMCA..
And of course who can forget Ch 7 News using Bronksi Beat’s Why – a song about discovering one’s homosexuality, great choice for a TV Channel with supposedly Family Values.
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I was going “lived there” as in Scotland, aka Sconnie Botland. Where Flora McKitchen could do her banking.
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Gotchya. I knew there would be a reason, I just couldn’t see it.
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Did R&I become the challenge bank? They had the worst yuppie themed ad campaign ever. I remember people at the cinema chucking stuff at the screen when it came on.
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Nope, Challenge was originally Perth Building Societywhich of course featured the previously discussed PBS Squirrel Club featuring Sally Squirrel. Challenge Bank was later taken over by Westpac who kept the brand alive till a couple of years ago and then rebranded them as Westpac Banks.
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There were two squirrels in the club, as I recall.
A male and female.
And, if I recall further, they had a show on TCW 9 circa 1983.
I also seem to know where I can get my hands on a set of pristine “You’re a PBS Star” wine glasses.
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Yes there were two, and I can’t recall the male one’s name, but it starfted on Ch 9 in 1983 with Jenny Dunstan, but moved over to Ch 7 about 12-19 months later when PBS decided to change media partners.
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I forget who likes which team, but it seems the Dockers fans were Worsting before anyone:
http://www.dockerland.com/message-board/search-361.html
“Tweed, Ms Love and the Jets would be sweet but only if they were preceded by Ice Tiger backing the chick from the PBS Squirrels in a aural-sex version of “Crosstown Traffic”.And if we’re going to get the chick from the PBS squirrels, why can’t Jo-Beth do something for the club – other than”
Ice Tiger!
The PBS Squirrels!
Jo-Beth (Taylor?)
The Jets.
And we will never know what it was Jo-Beth did for the Dockers in 2003, because that’s where the comment cuts off….
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Sammy?
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Someone was after a cup from Sniff My Llama today.
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