70’s Swingers Club

Just got back from a weekend of sex and wine at our new friends, who contacted us through your site. Can you let us know of any parties in our area.
It was fine wine i hope. – Ed.

Must be a few Worst of Perthers old enough to remember one of the stupidest inventions ever, the leather neck strap, wine glass holder. Would have been seen around the necks of many a safari suit wearer. Incredibly these things were actually popular, despite being guaranteed to soak your gut with wine the instant you leaned forwards to look down a polyester framed cleavage. Perhaps it was genuinely useful back in the smoking, swinging 70’s, where you could likely have had a port flavoured cigar in one hand and the bosses’ wife’s arse in the other, leaving no hand for your glass of Cold Duck. I’ve never seen evidence of a woman wearing one.  Also note the pissweak glass size.
Export quality tie

Export quality tie

And viddy well jealous droogies, the City of Perth cufflinks in action, as well as one of my father’s ties from the day, the classic Vogue Export Quality, made in Australia.

City of Perth

City of Perth

And the logo may be familar to close TWOP watchers. it appeared in January in another post. It’s 1973 Ok.

Howling Swans

Howling Swans

About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
This entry was posted in worst fashion, worst food and tagged , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

26 Responses to 70’s Swingers Club

  1. Groucho says:

    Oh the good old days of the Caversham wine festival and at the time these glasses and the “connection” to knowing at all times where yours was, was a good thing. Ah yes, smoking, eating and drinking at the same time was never so easy.


  2. Bento says:

    It viddies like that lupine vehina has gone to your gulliver.


  3. Adrian says:

    Those chunky cufflinks are like proverbial pillboxes of silver!!!

    if only the Maginot Line been constructed with a few of these little rippers history and the Second World War would have been somewhat different.

    IE: Hitler would have given up and gone back to supping a sickly viscuous Gewürztraminer and boning his Alsatian and Frau Braun.

    I’m still marvelling at the quality of the free-range polyesters used in that shirt!

    Ahem, while I wasn’t old enough to don a thong, I do recall them appearing at a few pool parties my parents threw in the earlyish 70s.

    Very stylish affairs they were too, the parties not the booze thongs.

    I seem to recall my parents going to a fancy dress party around 1972 (I was about eight) and dressing up as cave man and woman in expired cow skins.

    Yes, my father proudly donned the thong to complete the ensemble.

    Cometh the hour, cometh the man….with thong.


  4. Del Quant says:

    Shouldn’t the shirt be purple?


  5. poor lisa says:

    You dressed up and did a photo shoot for twop? You’re in too deep. Get out while you still can.


  6. Too late. Too late. I had a sarong on too.


  7. Rolly says:

    I think that you have a few gears slipping in the cranially enclosed gearbox TLA.
    Was the tie made from off-cuts from the sarong?
    As for the cufflinks; they really don’t need to be that chunky. The microsizing of the electronic circuitry etc. in ubersophisticated spyware (the real stuff, not the ‘virtual’ kind) in recent years has made the shoephone redundant too.


  8. “Was the tie made from off-cuts from the sarong?”
    What part of Vogue Export Quality don’t you get.

    “As for the cufflinks; they really don’t need to be that chunky. ”
    Bullshit. Not chunky enough.


  9. Bento says:

    Man in a skirt? There’s nothing sarong with that.

    Thank you very much. I’ll be here all week.


  10. Adrian says:

    I must admit you can really see the “export quality” in that tie.

    A pity they didn’t export them all.


  11. Cookster says:



  12. Vic Demised says:

    I purchased one of those swinging accessories at the Caversham wine festival in 1978. What a day (or daze)! As I recall I ended up in a strange bed in Subiaco with two (count ’em!) Kiwi gels, Dibbie and Glinda. Though I don’t think it had anything to do with my dangling wine glass. More likely it was down to my Golden Breed Hawaiian shirt with the coconut shell buttons. Sans sarong.


  13. David Cohen says:

    A suxy Subi sundwich for Vic. sunsational!


  14. poor lisa says:

    Don’t forget sens sarong David. Vic I’m wondering if you wandered around Caversham wearing nothing but a Golden Breed Hawaiian shirt & a dangling glass all day long. Cos anyone can pick up like that.


  15. poor lisa says:

    Why is that awaiting moderation? Weird.


  16. Cookster says:

    Hope Vic pecked hus chully bun well.


  17. Cookster says:

    Хорошо трахните меня товарищ, это – языковая война!


  18. Vic Demised says:

    Lisa @ 14 -Back then, yeah. I wuz lucky both chux were from Willington.

    Cookster @ 17, I’ve an idea what you’re implying with your cyrilic script, but no, we remained orthodox throughout.


  19. Snuff says:

    As the sign said in 1978 at the “Peoples Temple Agricultural Project”, “Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.”

    Choodessny platties and chasha, TLA.


    p.s. Just got home from a long weekend that included a brief pilgrimage to Belmont Park, Adachi-ku, which wasn’t actually entirely worst. Pics forthcoming, eventually.


  20. She Ra Lisa Scaffidi seemed shocked that Belmont had a sister city.


  21. Frank Calabrese says:

    She Ra Lisa Scaffidi seemed shocked that Belmont had a sister city.

    So does the City of Swan, My parent’s home village of Bivongi in Calabria :-)



  22. Perth is about to have Nanjing, a city I really like. May be back there in a few months. It’s the capital of the Taiping rebellion, where a Chinese guy thought he was jesus’ little brother. The result, 20 000 000 dead. Some say 30 million.



  23. Snuff says:

    Thanks for the great link, TLA. That was an excellent read, and it’s interesting to think what mightn’t have been had Hong just passed his civil service exam.

    So, that’s at least two little brothers Jesus had. Who knew ? Garlic Dracula Icecream ! Oishii !


  24. More interesting would have been if Hong hadn’t insisted on his version of the bible (he meets Jesus’ wife, and he and Jesus both beat Confucious with sticks up in heaven). The foreigners may have decided to side with the Taipings over the qing. That would have been a different China.


  25. Bento says:

    Do sister cities serve any purpose other than handy Councillor junket destinations?

    What is Belmont’s sister city? Minsk? I hear it’s lovely in the springtime.


  26. Snuff says:

    In practice, perhaps not, Bento, but in theory, here are the details. If you’d like to ride the gravy train, here are the selection criteria for the Liaison Officer.

    When I visited on Sunday they were preparing for the annual Adachi-ku International Festival which was held yesterday, so I wasn’t able to inspect the memorabilia inside the International Centre. Due to prior commitments, I wasn’t able to attend the Festival either, but I’ve marked it on my calendar for next year, and I’ll return to check out the memorabilia soon.

    According to skink, the Adachi-ku Garden in Belmont’s not too shabby, and it certainly scrubs up all right in this pic. Perhaps Belmont could devise some tripartite arrangement with Changchun.


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