Wet Queens

Dear Queens. Could I talk to your staff about having some means to dry my fucking hands after using the bog? Or am I supposed to pay $2 for a pheromone wipe? And while we are at it, your limp and tasteless “fries” would have embarrassed the defunct King Street Cafe. Think about it.

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About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
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17 Responses to Wet Queens

  1. scanners's avatar scanners says:

    If you think their “fries” are limp and tasteless what do you think of the muzak that get’s played at Queens? At least you can stroll up Beaufort Street and have a 50% chance of something decent being played at The Flying Scotsman.

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  2. Bento's avatar Bento says:

    Who washes their hands at the Queens? You want handwashing, fancy pants, get yourself to a vibrant small bar. Otherwise, shut your face and drink your (slightly willy-scented) beer.

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  3. scanners's avatar scanners says:

    A beer which generally speaking will cost a dollar more than the equivalent at The Scotsman.

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  4. rottobloggo's avatar rottobloggo says:

    Good DAY, sir.

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  5. Russell Woolf's Lovechild's avatar Russell Woolf's Lovechild says:

    Nice drunk proof laminating though. By the tone of this post, I take it the Wipe On Sex Appeal wipes don’t work then?

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  6. BSWAM's avatar BSWAM says:

    I like the implication that by “checking” someone regularly opens the door to the toilet and mutters: “yep, still there.”

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