The Best of my Banned by The West newsfeed this week. Current news alerts are in the sidebar, or subscribe to them all with The Worst of Perth rss news feed so you don’t miss any gold.

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Asia House brothel sued. A man told by Asia House staff “We have no orientals” has sued. “If I wanted to root some “ranga from Queensland” I…

May 1st is Bidet Calibration Day. (BCD). Incorrectly set bidet hot water settings cause thousands of ring burns in Perth every year. Tomorro…

Kiwi accent helped spread Swine flu. The guttural NZ style of speech helped kiwis aboard plane spread disease to Aussies. Back of throat s…

Lavender confiscation “thwarts cure”. Aromatherapy experts rushing to Mexico for the Swine Flu problem were fuming as 8 tonnes of lavender w…

“Lost hangi” sparks brawl. When two hours of digging in the beer garden failed to locate a whole lamb buried in a NZ style Hangi, Patrons o…

Swan River dolphins “May have dissolved”. Industrial and agricultural runoff may have dissolved a pod of dolphins seen in the Swan River tod…

Bea Arthur and J.G. Ballard deaths, “Deeply connected”. Both were on the phone to each other when they died. Both had been nervous, jumpy i…

Cuteness factor stymies quokka cull. Frustrated vets set to euthenase 400 quokkas “riddled with swine flu” have accused the media of putting…

The Cook and the Chef’s Simon Bryant tells all. “I was Only 19, by Redgum changed my life. Just the mention of “Puckapunyal” has me reaching…