The Best of my Banned by The West newsfeed this week. Current news alerts are in the sidebar, or subscribe to them all with The Worst of Perth rss news feed so you don’t miss any gold.

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Lamarckian principles explain Russell Crowe’s huge genitals. A critic of Darwin, Lamark claimed giraffe necks were lengthened by stretching…

Sting joins Madonna on adoption reject list. Brazilian naturalists today unanimously rejected Sting’s attempt to adopt a forest lichen despi…

Assholes “Aresholes” Kovacs. The West’s grammar guru Zoltan Kovacs says Aussies who us the US term “assholes” are arseholes. “You are arseho…

Young people – “We’re not misunderstood enough”. Teen groups and subcultures are not happy at the low level of misunderstanding from older p…

Daylight Savings Yes vote linked to impotence. Men over 40 calling for a Yes on DS, were often trying to regain lost youth – and lost wood…

Judi Dench to star as Dawn French in Biopic. Comedienne Dawn French was “over the moon” that Dame Judi Dench is set to play her in a 12 part…

Nicole Kidman to play child vampire in US remake of Let the Right One in. Tentatively titled “Let The Right Stuff In” Kidman & Colin Farrell…

Qantas baulks at cryogenic chamber. Liza Minelli needs to be chiilled to -60 deg in a liquid nitrogen tank for her tour of Oz, but Qantas ha…