Bento wept as he sent this-Wait, he did! What!?? It was Skype you Rainmakers!!-#truestoryfuckofffuturecunts. I know we’re always announcing Bayswater has reached rockbottom in the humiliation stakes, but this…is…different. Is there a level *below* cartridge world? The Slave 457 visa scam brothel gozleme van? Where you can also hire Predator sequels. When Jesters – even fucking Jesper, truth be told- wold shun these square hectares toxic to retail turnover, walkabiliy, lorry ingress and egress, – you know that population density, skull density and vibrancy will suffer. And Post vibrancy unless handled exquisitely. Which it won’t be.
Why don’t we Bayswaterians sink the railway? We are such knobheads, it’s exactly what we would fucking do, after of course we shut down roller hockey, and listen baffled as a Councillor explains that he didn’t massacre any aborigines. In the absence of independent media, ( no offence) let me just say, Bayswater fuck off. Don’t sink any railways before there’s a reason to get off. Don’t study walkabilty until there something to walk to apart from losers who want to refill their pirated inkjet cartridges.
I’m assured that “video library” is not compliant for Baysie’s futureAlexanderplatz, but still, what’s the difference? What’s the fucking difference? About time there was an editorial. 
The Worst of Perth 
Leave the railway . . . sink Bayswater! Herr Emperor will build a bypass road, maybe to Ellenbrook
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Flooding Baysie would be a give the swampies and squashed birdlife from Roe 8 somewhere to go. How about it Sneakers? You know it makes sence.
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No handjobs?
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Claremont killings arrest: Will they finally be able to stitch up Rayney at long last?
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I predicted there would be shark and Claremont serial killer action specifically to mess with Outrage’s holidays.
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Biggest Wa news story of the year and 720 is broadcasting filler. Is Peter Bell not lightweight enough already?
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This would never happen on Sticky McGlue’s watch.
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I’d rather have the gozleme van than the Red Castle.
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There’s a vacancy for Vibrancy Control Officer waiting for you in that case. ($48,500-$52,500).
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Let me imagine. You get an interview and in there you look them in the eye and say “I really want to get hold of Bayswater’s vibrancy controls.”
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I think they refer to them as vibrancy knobs.
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And they go to 11.
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Is that “Cold Po Service’ on the next door premises?
Or ‘Gold Po’?
With the poliferation of of heated bidet-imitating toilet seats and gold plated fitments in the average economy versions of the MacMansions which poor unemployed young couples with 6 kids strive to save a deposit for, it should become quite a thriving enterprise.
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Adjust tracking or vertical hold?
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It’s always the tracking.
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A tidal vortex of failed small business delusions : $1000 for your web site ? , yeah sure. In vino et veritas.
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Jesters was the finest finishing school for Webmasters north of the river.
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I’m such an OG in this hood I actually rented VHS tapes from that joint.
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Return them?
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Nah man I’m too scared of the late fees.
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What Bayswater really needs…
Proper precisionist wall murals, Jeffrey Smart-style: ’60s salmon brick houses, cocos palms, relentless etc,, registered lawn (mostly dead) and if you look closely (the detail, the detail!) just a hint of hastily patched brickwork on the front room.
Get cracking, Bayswater Council.
PS, yes, i know precisionist is a bullshit word.
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After the style of Smart https://theworstofperth.com/2012/04/17/faggots-drive-utes/
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Sinking baysie might keep embleton resident and regular beach goer Macdonald out of the western suburbs.
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Oh the Humanity !!!!!
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Oh the Humanity again !!!!!
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Is lorry ingress a good thing or a bad thing in these multikulti times?
What is a lorry anyway? I’ll ask someone next time I’m up in Hillarys.
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Padbury will be far enough.
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Bayswater is a boil that must be lanced. Not even a good Boyle like Susan.
A suburb of on earth purgatory. They should get creative and SINK Bayswater AROUND the railway. This would make way for more carparks, wider cyclepaths also allowing to expand on the roadside strips of grey sand and shitbox native trees.
In fairness to this retailer I give full points for the colour scheme and integration of the word ‘force’ – where else can you get a complimentary keylogger with your PC repair ???
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