Visiting Elizabeth Quay

Well I guess I had to go down there. Well it’s not exactly bad, just a bit underwhelming and pointless. After the trees have grown for 30 years, there might be some shade relief to the merciless baking paving. The bridge is ok. But there’s no reason to cross it, or even for it to be there. It’s not a special place to go. The water is already turgid looking. And again, what’s the point of it? Some of the bare grass will be covered, but not by anything you’d actually need or want to go to. Hotel. Mining company hq? What’s it for? So it’s not terrible, just money wasted when something better could have been done. It’s not the special place, which we were promised. The only thing that I could find that youse would like is a royally crappy figurative bronze. Has Perth still not grown out of this shite?No plaque as to who it is. Or who it is by. 



About AHC McDonald

Comedian, artist, photographer and critic. From 2007 to 2017 ran the culture and satire site The Worst of Perth
This entry was posted in worst architecture, worst public art, worst sculpture and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

64 Responses to Visiting Elizabeth Quay

  1. Roland says:

    Don’t worry, in at least 20 years there will be some apartment blocks to provide shade :/

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Rong1 says:

    That’s Mary Poppins standing on a dried out cow pat

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  3. Bento says:

    James Spader?

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  4. Shreiking Wombat Ninja says:

    Has all the hallmarks of the Smiths. Woman stands on cowpat.

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  5. Gorilla says:

    Agree. It’s alot of money for a ferry terminal.

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  6. Scanners says:

    There’s something about the positioning of that parasol that doesn’t sit well with me. And then there’s the hands, which are surely those of a man?

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  7. Snuff says:

    I’m guessing she’s facing the Narrows Bridge. Nice digs.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Pingback: Visiting Elizabeth Quay – Julie Matheson's Blog

  9. Zuben says:

    Her family was ENGAGED ??

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  10. ewfire11 says:

    Seattle has a similar district down on its waterfront known as the ‘Pyke Place Markets’. Same size and same sort of location as this, city for city….. It pulls 10 Million visitors per year because it was set up to be a FUNCTIONING district. The 35th highest tourism magnet on the planet!. It has everything. Did any CLOWN from Perth planning take a look at this district and get one single solitary clue as to what a city can build to cater to its own people plus the millions visiting??? And what works in terms of putting a heart and soul into a district/city and not just another bland, modernistic, gimmicky, government designed, park? (at best). I hope those pavers are well ‘nailed down’…… Already we have seen what good missiles they can make.

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    • Zuben says:

      Well Pike Place is a sort of superimposed steel structure close to where boats and trains unload things to be bought . The shallow draft of the swan river precludes that . A market at a place like EQ ( or anywhere else in Perth CBD ) would involve trucks fighting their way into it . As no doubt it shall in future …

      But your point about w a government design stupidity is well taken

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      • A jellyfish market could work.

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      • ewfire11 says:

        I’m aware of the differences in locations. My point is as much that when you create something functioning for people, you give a ‘heart and soul’ and very soon the people see to it, that it continues to grow and flourish. Markets are a good example of this. And so are excellent theme parks and fair grounds as can be found in some cities and Vienna springs to mind here. Gimmick Las Vegas style superficial modernity offers exactly what to the people of a city? Just exactly what does that so called art work offer? Or the million dollar McDonalds bridge? Its tackiness beyond words.

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    • you'll get wet says:

      You’re talking metrics here. Success will be measured by counting the number of beggars who can make a living by moving there from the malls.

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    • BSWAM says:

      But Pike’s Place was a functioning market for many years, not a large scale urban development. I’d say perhaps the comparison should be to Rockefeller Center. Not sure to what extent Elizabeth Quay comes up short, but it can’t be by much more than any other given knock-off of that concept since then. RC works wonderfully, but it seems hard to identify precisely why and why its success has been so hard to replicate elsewhere.

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  11. you'll get wet says:

    Robbing the Pilbara to pay Perth. An indigenous arts centre would have been like pissing in the corner of the house you just robbed.

    Did you see any dead Blowies?

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  12. Shane says:

    “There’s no reason to cross the bridge” – I’m really happy that now the quay is finished, there’s a a way to continuing cycling along the riverside instead of taking a massive detour around the Conv Centre. And the wooden slats make a nice thumping sound as you ride over them. :)

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  13. Bento says:

    I still think she looks like a young James Spader in a dressing gown.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Misspent Yoof says:

    The people of Petth should now start volunteering their labour to build a giant stone pyramid in one of the vacant lots next to the quay. Pilbara banded iron would be nice, and it’s pretty cheap at the moment, as well as being extremely hard wearing. Once the pyramid is complete and Emperor Colon succumbs to the blood pressure problems he’s had for years, he can be buried there in a tomb suitable for someone of his enormous girth… I mean prestige.
    And 1,000 years from now children will gaze at it in awe, and ask
    “Who was that fat bloke with the pink face”.

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  15. Suze says:

    It is Bessie Rischbeith. She was a conservationist and tried to protect the river foreshore from development. She also was instrumental in keeping King’s Park as it is now because there were plans to put facilities for the 1962 commonwealth games there. She was also an unapologetic feminist and women’s rights advocate. When the narrows bridge was being built she walked into the river in front of bulldozers to try to prevent it being built. Far from a demure lady with a parasol she would be horrified by Betty’s Jetty.

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  16. Zuben says:

    It is absolutely squalid that MRA caused a memorial to Rieschbeith to be made a feature of this new thang on the waterfront .

    Well done TLA et al for making us aware … This is what twop is for ( among other things ) .

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  17. Zuben says:

    She would have been more beautiful in youth than that ( to judge from photos )

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  18. Zuben says:

    On a different subject the sleazy activity centre known as EQ has got a go ahead over the next 20 years to the tune of multiples of 440m , but the former K Michael is saying on behalf of the state of w a that yarloop may not be rebuilt ???

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  19. Zuben says:

    ‘ continue as a town ‘ was the way it was put in today s online wurst

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  20. inthemailbox says:

    The Bessie Rischbieth statue is an attempt by the MRA to work with the heritage of the place, now mostly destroyed by the development. They really don’t get it.
    If a female figure was required, there was a fabulous woman in the 1920s who stood on a soapbox each week, protesting the government of the day…

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  21. mancey says:

    Any updated takes on this one. Went there recently and had a pretty enjoyable boozy arvo. I’ve warmed to it a lot

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