A commercial designer associate ranted about Morley’s Coventry Square markets: “heinous” was one of the adjectives. I was sceptical, as the pre-opening buzz was intense. Krazy Kym and I checked them out, and we are pleased to report they are a triumph.
The artists’ impressions were very promising, and the CSM website had all the facts: “Coventry Square Markets are one of Australia’s premier markets. Situated adjacent to Centro Galleria in Morley, the markets will be a veritable mix of restaurants, cafes and specialty shops. It will be a focal point for both local and overseas tourists, a meeting place for families, friends and a cultural experience for all.”
The media know a good story when they see it, and in 2010 confident predictions were being made CSM would generate “more vibrancy”. And it was thus: this report in the paper of record quoted the developer, a successful businessman, saying the project would “actually dwarf” something in Melbourne.
The art engages the eye before you’re inside.
These superb friezes are a feature throughout the markets.
The Friendly Industrial Arching Shed-ist Connecting Outside style is like a European cathedral.
Lots of stuff to buy, including boozies.
And dolphins.
And exotic fruit. Everyone involved is to be commended and our commercial designer associate needs to have a good hard look at herself.
The Worst of Perth 
thanks defrock, i have been meaning to head down for some pics since i drove past a while back and was completely blown away with the utter hideousity of the exterior.
a truly awesome worst.
LikeLike
“Defrock”??
LikeLike
It’s what happens to Priests and Parsons who’ve been naughty in some way or other.
Not a concern for your good self, really ;)
LikeLike
you say dfoc, i say defrock.
LikeLike
Hard to blame the client for this one.
LikeLike
Trust me, it’s the client. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Wait, sunstorm, were you talking about the specific clients here? In that case I have to xxxx you. If you mean clents in general, then yes, they are xxxx xxxxx.TLA
LikeLike
Specific, yeah. Other clients of architects I can’t comment on. XXXX as you see fit, your website.
LikeLike
How on earth do you manage to suck a pencil with your tongue so firmly embedded in your cheek?
LikeLike
It’s a skill, just like juggling.
LikeLike
Best not to bite down too hard, though.
LikeLike
Shedism – with embellishments – seems to be “High End” architectural fashion this Season.
LikeLike
Those friezes remind me of Pompeii.
Unfortunately, thanks to Wait Awhile’s lack of geothermal vibrancy, we can only dream.
LikeLike
Coverntry is dumb its too overpriced!
LikeLike
The legend is dumb. He needs to learn how to spell. !!
LikeLike
Is that Paris Hilton in the first pic?
LikeLike
Not Paris. But note she has a dopple-ganger with same orang shopping bag.
LikeLike
Hard to tell from that angle, g1. I would link to a knickerless upskirt, but nobody wants to see that
again.LikeLike
Covering a building with scrap metal motifs does not make it appealing to either look at or venture into. Especially when it’s 37° and you’re in Morley.
LikeLike
I think the metal spikes are the rib bones of Coventry’s caryard.
LikeLike
What the hell? Why all the fake Chesterfields?
LikeLike
It’s like merrys furniture relocated.
LikeLike
heh!
LikeLike
The lighting is freaking me out too.
LikeLike
They seem to have have had something a little Kubrick-esque in mind.
LikeLike
Dolphins. Boozies. Dolphin boozies !
LikeLike
Fool, everyone know’s its ‘Pommagranets’
LikeLike
The artists appear to have significantly underestimated the girth of the actual patrons.
LikeLike
I think it’s nice that the people too ugly even for Galleria have somewhere to go.
LikeLike
If you’re too ugly for Galleria, you’re too ugly for life. or as Mr Cricket would say, If your too ugly…
LikeLike
Yak it up. Like your spelling is flawless.
LikeLike
I revel in it.
LikeLike
“I revvell in it”, you mean.
LikeLike
Belmont Forum?
LikeLike
Carousel.
LikeLike
Are those rugs on the floor for sale?
LikeLike
I used to work there, when it was still Coventrys.
Nice to see virtually nothing has changed.
LikeLike
u are all retards you build something better than coventry markets then if you think youre all that in the mean time suck on a carrot!
LikeLike
I built this city on rock and roll. Good Day Sir.
LikeLike
Give one of us the $60m that was supposedly used to build it, and you have a deal.
LikeLike
How’s this then, andrew ?
LikeLike
You mean suck on a pencil andrew.
LikeLike
do any chicks go their looking to give head ?
LikeLike
No Andrew Coventry markets suck
Suggest you cum to Mullaloo dog beach, if you see me and my rottweiler say G’Day Valerie are you and your dog “looking to give head”
LikeLike
I actually like the outside. The inside on the other hand … those plaster moulding jobs make me want to barf.
LikeLike
Pingback: Outrage Sunday 40 the scream | The Worst of Perth
Pingback: Outrage Sunday 63 your time is now | The Worst of Perth
Pingback: Outrage Sunday 64 Ziggurat of Les | The Worst of Perth
It really is the worst designed interior and exterior of any large scale building project in Perth. The shell of the building is fairly modern – enough to withstand the test of time for a couple of decades. It’s all the hideous embellishments on the inside and outside that has ruined it. Keep it SIMPLE! An absolute waste of an opportunity.
LikeLike
Pingback: Outrage Sunday 71 pool of poofterism | The Worst of Perth
Today Sunday 27th July decided to give the Coventry Market a try for lunch.
What a disgrace. Couldn’t get in or out because of traffic jams both ways and wasted one hour. How frustrating.
We found a parking eventually and went to the galleria. Why would we come back back to Coventry? There is nothing special there anyway, it’s a barn with small under stocked shops with nothing that the Galleria hasn’t got.
Won’t see me there again – I would predict its entire closure by December 2013.
LikeLike
You park at the markets across the road. And pretend you are buying some sewing machine parts.
LikeLike
Definitely a missed opportunity – Strzelecki Holdings Pty Ltd & City of Bayswater you have a lot to answer for! The only saving grace is that the structure can be easily demolished. Only so many $2 shops & traffic snarls I can take! Go residential or mixed residential\retail surrounding a large square suited to weekend fruit & veg market stalls. Pay homage to all the local immigrants & call it “Little Italy” while ya at it!
LikeLike
The Voice with the latest SPUDSHED news:
LikeLike
Hope Spudshed enjoys getting ripped off.
LikeLike
Spudshed and Coventry Markets deserve each other. Went to Spudshed Innaloo last year and was absolutely appalled at the utter crap they sell.
If it’s cheap-arse you want, with little regard to quality. Spudshed is for you.
Every product in the Shed is imported highly-processed garbage food from 3rd world countries, laced with enough preservatives and food additives to keep you higher than a kite for a week.
Vegies that would be binned in any other shop are merely “ON SPECIAL” in Spudshed.
Tony has one simple aim in mind with Spudshed – buy the cheapest crap you can find, from anywhere in the world, and sell it at just below Coles and Woolies prices.
I’ll hazard a guess the bottom feeders who frequent CSM won’t know any different, and Tony will continue to rake it in.
LikeLike
Market developer in the paper of record!:
https://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/wa/a/32445658/no-one-likes-backing-losers-says-lib-donor/#page1
LikeLike
Transgender Minister Diddler Dawdler plays innocent bystander.
LikeLike
Nothing worse than buying a politician who doesn’t deliver. This never happened when Brian Burke was in charge.
LikeLike