Tantalising glimpse through the back gate of the former Red Parrot Nightclub, now Artrage workshop. For one, there’s a giant mirror ball, but more interesting for worst fans are the dums of “Big Meal Single Serve” stacked nearby. I assumed that the Artrage worker diet would lean heavily in the 2 minute noodle direction, but these barrels of faux soylent are a savage indictment of this city’s arts funding. Let a thousand haikus bloom. 
Worst Talk
paulie48406 on Pizza Showtime! AHC McDonald on Pizza Showtime! Anonymous on Pizza Showtime! Anonymous on Pizza Showtime! Anonymous on Pizza Showtime! AHC McDonald on Pulling Off Trucks AHC McDonald on Alexander The Great’s… Anonymous on Alexander The Great’s… AHC McDonald on Private Dancer Anonymous on Private Dancer Anonymous on Private Dancer Anonymous on Private Dancer Anonymous on Is Australian Silo Art Ra… Anonymous on Pulling Off Trucks Anonymous on Rap Mobile Online Now
The Asia Beat- Museum of Winds Opens
- Vagina Steaming to go on despite diarrhea outbreak.
- Dog movie “racist”.
- Liquid food blogger enrages Sing. Chef
- Sushi Train Wreck
- Snake of the year spat turns nasty
- Aussie icon may cure sick
- Singapore admits, “National Service all about shooting Malaysians.”
- Asian firm sparks “wife beater” brawl.
- Actors protest over MH370 delay
The Worst of Perth 
hmmm, soup anyone?
http://bit.ly/9GMfo5
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Warhol- What an Amateur.
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Yes WAtching, indeed!
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Duck Egg?
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a href=”http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4006/4214570995_4de29e618e.jpg”>Easter egg?
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Try that again:
Easter egg?
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Sovings?
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It’s not all about the shovings.
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That’s just an old show prop. I don’t think the bogans of Balga consider it a Michelin Star banquet.
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Still waiting for the inside view of the place from someone.
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Meh.
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C’mon Bento, fair suck of the sauce bottle.
Meh meh meh meh meh
meh meh meh meh meh spring time
meh meh meh meh meh
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Take a step back and see the little people
They might be young, but they’re the ones that make the big people big
So listen as they whisper:
“What about meh?”
What about meh? It isn’t fair
I’ve had enough, now I want my share
Can’t you see, I wanna live
But you just take more than you give
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Best haiku I’ve seen in a while!
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I do believe that as we discuss industrialised foods today it is appropriate to draw to your attention the demise of
the inventor of the wine cask, South Australian Riverland grape grower Thomas Angove, has died in Renmark, aged 92.
http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2010/03/31/2861025.htm
The man should be cannonised for seeing many of us through our drunken teenage years. RIP Thomas.
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Teenage years only? Now I’m all grown up an’ all, I opt for the 2L Yalumba “Reserve” rather than the 4L Morris, Stanley, etc. Class, I tells ya.
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Oh like this you mean NF1?
http://bit.ly/c6sIoE
can’t say i’ve had a cask lately – might be time to get a cask of cheeky port to see me through the freezing cold brisvegas winter :)
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I’m so there.
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In Brisvegas drinking port with me or at the magic winecask house?
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Either/or.
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sweet seeya soon :)
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want to shoot him out of a cannon?
that would be some funeral
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Yep, what a show that’d be skinkadink!
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A goonbag pillow under his head is surely compulsory?
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And coffin made from deconstructed wine cask boxes.
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Apparently he had some bladder problems in later life.
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And felt too boxed in by his career choice.
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In any case, he did little work himself, and instead relied on the service of a paid goon.
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Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachthani!
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“…because Thomas, you essentially guaranteed the downward alcholic decline of a nation with your genius coffin pillow invention…..”
Matthew 27:46 (b) MP version
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Employing a bit of a fruity lexicon there NF- been bottling that up for a while?
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Riesling to the occasion, I see.
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In order to get the last few drops of formaldehyde out of his body, they had to blow some air up his arse.
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He always had a somewhat inflated sense of his own importance.
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you really are squeezing every last drop out of this
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He will never know how he touched my life.
In honour of Thomas, but conceding I could not be seen in the arrondissement with a cask, I have purchased, and am currently consuming, a $9 bottle of Merlot. It has all the flavour of a true goon, but without the social stigma. Vale, Thomas.
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Hear, Hear…
He deserves a little recognition. Let’s face it- the guy invented about 80% of university entertainment.
Imagine his Wake. You wouldn’t propose a toast… you’d propose a throw.
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Yes I too am enjoying a bottled, but could be cask, Chardy. Thomas, may you rest in peace, much the same way many others have after enjoying the goon.
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I might even break out the Sudafed, and make a proper student night of it.
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Better get Dominoes on the speed dial. That come down is best alleviated with a scoob and food. Then a hair of the dog at the Tav.
Ah, good times. (not that i ever inhaled)
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I’m a Teetotaller as you would have noticed at “The Brisbane”
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I only noticed one person not drinking.
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I do not recall, your Honour.
You really should try this merlot. It’s so awful, I’ve decided to pronounce the ‘t’.
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Just split a cheapo obscure Czech beer six-pack with a mate, and now finishing off the remainder of last night’s Yalumba Classic Dry White two litre, while I contemplate marking a pile of first year uni essays.
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Well, that’s probably how they were written, I guess.
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I think you’ll find that uni students are generally far less pissy now, and more conservative, than of old.
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Really? I thought that was just my perception, as I was on my second go-round, and had become the mature-ager i used to hate.
Not so?
Cunts.
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Indeed!
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Although I did receive an email from a student recently apologizing for his failure to hand in an essay due to toga party related reasons.
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Perhaps I should give him an HD?
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When Lawrence Apps was my tutor, I went to see him to explain I was having difficulty managing the workload because I was drinking too much. We talked for an hour about red wine, and he gave me a High Distinction.
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OMFG!
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Excessive alcohol/red wine consumption surely goes with the journalistic territory Bento, so no surprises there, unless I’m simply repeating old clichés.
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Not Budvar, by any chance?
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Žatec. Wiki tells me that the city of “Žatec became famous for an over-700-year-long tradition of growing Saaz noble hops used by several breweries”.
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Did you fall for the old ‘hey-this-carton’s-cheap-get-home-fuck-me-they’re-only-330ml-bottles-you-cuuuuuuuunts’ trick?
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Walked into the situation with open eyes Bento, and a thirst for a $12 six-pack.
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Glad to hear it wasn’t Brad up to his usual cuntery.
Blimey, that merlott’s giving me a potty mouth.
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Where abouts at Ole CU do you work N? Do you stare in at my office occasionally?
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That would be telling TLA, though I am happy to say that it’s not Media, Culture and Creative Arts. No doubt we’ve unwittingly crossed paths at some point.
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I’m picturing you walking past a sculpture of a giant brain into an unairconditioned building when you go to work.
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And I’ll bet the set texts are the most expensive on campus.
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I’m thinking your set text price gouging guess is correct too bento.
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As unfamiliar as I am with the Curtin landscape TLA, I fail to recognize your allusion. I’m usually too busy wincing at the Brutalist and faux-Louis Kahn buildings to take much notice.
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Unless you’re simply taking the piss.
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Really? So if I was picturing you going up stairs that don’t go to the fucking level you want, but you can see that level across a void but can’t actually get there, that wouldn’t be right either? interesting.
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Very funny, and more or less correct.
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Are you in Escher Hall, NF1?
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You may have pinned a less prolific, less cared about twopper with that one.
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RIght I thought that might happen – that was a response to LA at 7.36pm
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There’s your clue TLA…
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built environment?
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Do you occasionally stare out of your office, thinking- “Is that him/her?”
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If really bad and you spew, call it a Herlot
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Dear god, I’m nearly at the bottom of the bottle, and it hasn’t gotten any better.
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beer chaser?
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I think there’s still some advocaat from Christmas snowballs, and maybe then I could lick the ashtrays at the Scotsman. Failing that, there’s the Calabrese Fortified Firewater.
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In Fitzroy Crossing, Scotty and Old Ivan used to collect the empty cans in the bush surrounding the Crossing Inn in the early mornings. When he was in town, a charming and apparently indestructible man used to assist them, knocking back whatever was left in them first, and laconically spitting out any butts. Respect.
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So? you bought a case right? By the bottom of the second it’ll be like a Château Latour
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teetotal like a fox. No, Paracleet could out teetotal you and run a mile.
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Hey man, drinking problems aren’t funny.
Wait, what?
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While listyenig to this band:-)
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I think that’s the mirror ball Geisha bar brought unseen, then found out that they couldn’t fit it in the bar – hilarious! Artrage got it on the cheap and it used to hang in the back section of the Bakery.
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Bisector plane meal
Reap’t as you sove; one single
Recursive barrel
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Death of the artist
Critical categories
Fail as art goes “pop”
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Fucking Artrage now,
Finally, gathering dust
Deservedly so
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Thankfully we have
The Perth Writers’ Festival
To tide us over
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Piero Manzoni
filled a can with his own shit.
Artrage supersized it.
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can’t fucking count
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There’s a typo, skink. You mean can’t fucking cunt.
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No, it should be: cunt, fucking count
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Dracula was a cunt of a Count.
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1 laugh ah ah ah
2 laugh ah ah ah
3 laugh ah ah ah
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Fuck me sideways Jesus with tits on top. Check-out what’s just arrived in Fremantle:
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I was just looking at this on lovefreo SW. Looks like a nice day for a swim doesn’t it?
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What will they unload it with?
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A skyhook.
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I see…
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A little Dawkins humour for you, there.
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Sorry, feeling a little bit “river dolphin” today.
So you think it will evolve onto the dock?
Just glad that we don’t have to debate about “god or otherwise” in Australia.
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I love that TWOP has become a hotbed of italicisation, thanks to Snuff.
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Was just thinking the same thing today. I cun’t believe we endured so long without it.
I also love the rash of posts like this…
<ahref="http://s866.photobucket.com/albums/ab223/lipkrieg/?action=view¤t=DSC00475.jpg" blah
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Perhaps Snuff should treat us to one new HTML concept per week, so we can all practice together.
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I saw the link, didn’t bother to look, and now all youse cunts, are bolding and itallicising like tomorrows never coming. I’m an old dog, so no new tricks for me.
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Awwww come on shazz.
If you won’t href it for us href it for the Future Cunts.
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That’s right, shaz. You never know what people will still be talking about a quarter of a century from now.
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Unloading those cranes ? They should unload themselves, ie. sling their hooks up onto the top of C-shed then reel in.
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and I see from the newspaper that this weekend is Fremantle Buskers, Jugglers, Living Statues and Other Irritating Cunts Festival.
theer must be some good Twopportunities for photos.
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I’m completely avoiding it.
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Nor did the teh incompetently run booze ‘n roots festival get good meeja.
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Fremantle really excels at hobos though. The number of stinking, piss-stained hobos I’ve seen shuffling thru Freo – what I don’t understand is, they’re right on the fucking coast, have a cleansing swim for fuck’s sake! but noooooooo, it’s ‘bathe High Street in the stench of a microwaved urinal’ instead
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Tell me about it. It’s the main reason I try and avoid going into Freo. Well, that and the fact that it’s such a magnet for bogans shipped in by the trainload from Midland and Armadale.
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Fair suck of the sauce bottle Pfortner. Cleanliness is an understandable casualty of the lost soul.
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hah! I was at Bathers Beach today and saw one of the abovementioned hobos wading up to his knees.
Last week’s rain meant that he only had to do the bottom half. Meanwhile Northbridge hobos have to wait until the next storm to get their feet clean.
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Knee deep is only going to get to a portion of the piss stains.
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The place for hobos is of course the Burger King opposite the markets. My daughter and I have spent many hours in there, drinking bottomless cokes, observing the endless tide of tramps. Approaching the counter, their hands jealously guarding change, gazing up in mystification at the menu, the long colourful discussion with the server, then the open pleasure as they masticate.
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*Gazes in mystification at previous post* :)
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Save your judgment for yourself
Lest you wind up on this road
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That’s me already, though I’ve never tried my hand at bribery.
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I shall be there. Resplendent in my hemp overalls and stilts. Been practicing my juggling and drumming all week. Can’t wait. There’ll be ooshta up the yin yang.
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It’s not all about the shoving, shazz.
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It’s Ok SW, it’ll be all class.
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Speaking of class:
“Skimpies king cleared of insider trading”
http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewest/a/-/breaking/7010232/skimpies-king-cleared-of-insider-trading/
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yeah I doubt ‘e was ‘trading’ insid er if ya know wot i mean eh eh *nudge* all class
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Glitterdome welcome
A warm bough for sitting to
Drink electric soup.
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not sure ifn anyone has mentioned it yet but the big tins were from an exhibition at Breadbox Gallery called Supermart – 2004, I think – is it still art if it is stored upsidedown in an abandoned nightclub?
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It has been mentioned I think.
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They seem familiar to me.
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It’s still art Mez if it was created with the intention that it be so, hehe.
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ah, but is a painting still a painting when the lights are turned off?
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And does intention explain found objects, or nature.
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Found or natural objects can be intentionally framed/i>, though obviously not created, as artworks. On this account, among others, I mostly dispute intentionalist accounts of art. While the receiver’s intention is necessary to aesthetic experience, the artist’s is not.
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Italic craziness!
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precisely
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I agree with you highly italicsed comment but would add that the art requires a viewers gaze to be art at all – I guess that my question is that if no one sees it, can it still funtion as art?
A definition of art is another thing entirely
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I agree that art requires an audience. As trite as it sounds, the question “What is art?” should be replaced with “When is art?”. We erroneously objectify the aesthetic via the artwork, all the while forgetting that art works.
I’m making myself sick now.
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me too )
http://www.annaschwartzgallery.com/works/works?artist=45&c=m
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Geez, I’d forgotten all about Mike Parr. A poor man’s Paul McCarthy?
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yeah, vomit just doesn’t cut it, if it ‘aint piss or blood, it ‘aint art
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Don’t forget shit – very important. Shitting is, after all, the primal creative act.
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Re”
Found or natural objects can be intentionally framed/i>, though obviously not created, as artworks. On this account, among others, I mostly dispute intentionalist accounts of art. While the receiver’s intention is necessary to aesthetic experience, the artist’s is not.
——————————–
With that sort of talk I’d be making you part time or sessional, so that you don’t get the complacency and smugness a fair and full time contract would entail.
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Perceptive cunt.
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And now we need to pin down WAtching’s workhouse
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In regard to you TLA, what part of the campus should I be avoiding?
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The
East Side
of building 103. The busiest thoroughfare on campus,
Sir Charles Court Blvd
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Self-disclosive posts
Natalia Fan now shrinks
Cockroach-like from light
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Really?
Good luck. We’re very secretive in the plastic fork industry.
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So, TLA: Any clues as to the location of the WAtching Cave?
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Well, all I’ve got so far is…
They lookin’ at me like, who is, who is he?
I straighten up yo boy, he raised in teh streets
My name’s WAtching and you can spell it when I step in yo room
Take VI, Chevy go zoom
I hit the club with a mug so mean
Got them niggas like who the fuck is that
Then I hopped up out the car so clean
Got them niggas like who the fuck is that
So I’m closing in on West leederville or even the Chevy side of Subi.
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I see you have improved your technology.
I can expect an attack any day now… ho-meeee….
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Quote of the day: “Even the oblivion into which the work can sink is not nothing; it is still a preservation”.
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and there is your answer…
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And the comments go haywire again.
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I have it on good authority that, that massive disco ball was purchased for a very large sum of money for a perth nightclub….when it arrived they couldn’t get the damn thing through any of the doors into the club and thus sold it to artrage for half the price.
hahahahaha perth.
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I think I know your source.
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