The Worst of Perth » worst classics

Outrage Sunday 25 induce this

rottobloggo — Sat, 22 Oct 2011 16:01:56 +0000

The delicious distinction about Teh Worst is also worst. (Update: The Stoned Ranger points out The Echo is hiring).

Speaking of distinctions, I’ve only received trivial death threats. I trust TL101 can tell us who Selena Gomez is.

I have been toying with the idea of a new blog on poor media practice: what do you reckon? Our version of Media Watch. Hmmm…anyway, please make sure you have enough SEXWAX before CHOGM hits.

Another death-defying nmbrpl8t: I’m sure SLVABULET has ample SEXWAX.

Does Margaret have a moustache problem, or is it subtle vandalism? If it is the latter it may be due to the abuse of classic – or are you meant to cook the great woman herself?

Tower & Culture

The Lazy Aussie — Thu, 29 Sep 2011 16:01:19 +0000

More history. The building once at the corner of ~~Outram~~ Ord Street and Thomas Street in West Perth in the actual process of falling. It was either Al Queada or Osborne Park All Demos. I think it was the Disability Services building. Can’t remember what went up in its place. Late 1990s. And a shot of a dude with a Culture Club shirt, I took on the streets of Northbridge 1983.

Clubbing

The Lazy Aussie — Sun, 11 Sep 2011 16:01:21 +0000

Two more pieces of history from from my film negative vault. Firstly this is the one time site of one of those ultra crappy 80s Perth nightclubs on fire. I can’t remember what it was called originally. Eagle Bum? Penisocchios? (Puke) Musos Club? Knob Gobblers? Not sure of the date of this. End of last century sometime. And earlier still, (1987?) I found another shot of the Firm crowd, where some dude actually does have a beret on. And if you want to see some not worst, here’s a shot I took in St Mark’s Square Venice 1997. Hadn’t even proofed it before. I staggered out of Harry’s Bar around midnight, apparently and implausibly clutching a ridiculous 1960s twin lens medium format camera. My first words on seeing the scan were, “Shit, that’s pretty fucken good!”

Outrage Sunday 19 Truthers Redux

rottobloggo — Sat, 10 Sep 2011 16:01:45 +0000

This superb scale model of the Twin Towers will be on show in Kings Park today – but it’s not a swap meet.

No, it’s much more serious than that: Truthers still fearlessly walk among us, and they will have this model they built themselves, plus flyers, documentaries and other convincing stuff to educate us sheople.

“It’s that time of year. 10 years on and still no answers. Time to spread some truth and open some eyes,” they say on Meetup.com. “It has been suggested that being a Sunday we hit a more family friendly location such as Kings Park, where we have the ability to recreate. There will be a stall setup near the War memorial/flame in Kings Park with a “Google 9/11 Truth” banner displayed. Please come along anytime between 10am – 2pm and bring along family & friends, along with if you wish, something to eat/cook on the BBQs provided.”

They also have the ability to think TLA is a gerbalist, as Bento noted the last time Truthers were drawn to TWOPland. They were cruelly mocked by skink: “I blame the NWA: Dr Dre is in league with the Masons and elements of the Third Reich who escaped Berlin and settled in Girrawheen, where they have been trying to splice alien DNA onto the corpse of Chris Mainwairing. Ben Cousins found out what was going on and Ice Cube planted sunflowers on him to discredit him.”

If local Truthers aren’t your cup of nanothermite, buy a $77 ticket to see David Icke at UWA’s Octagon Theatre next week. If Truthers and Mr Icke got together they’d be irresistible.

“Join David Icke as he shares his new insights into the agenda of the New World Order and the solutions we need in order to reach our true potential on this planet. Speaking to a packed audience in Melbourne in 2009, the event was considered a huge success and inspired hundreds of truth seekers in Australia to start moving towards a peaceful evolution of non-compliance. David will be speaking for over 7 hours.” Proceeds towards helping fund David’s research into the New World Order.

No wonder the Dwyer/Flynn book was remaindered to $5 on Bay View Terrace in Claremont, where Dymocks used to be, last week. People don’t want New World Order propaganda pap from patsies – they want the Truthers! (Wait – a $5 shop on the Terrace? Is that a Worst?).

More 1980s

The Lazy Aussie — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 03:26:18 +0000

Some more I have just scanned/rescanned from my archives. I can’t remember where this house is. Looks like North perth. It’s 496 something. (Not william I don’t think,). Anyone recognise or know if it still exists? And my lovely old V8. Both shots are from around 1989 I’m guessing. (Where’s Bag O’Turnips BTW?)

Smokeys Burgers

The Lazy Aussie — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 16:01:40 +0000

Did you know Perth had a burger joint with rollerskating chicks serving the cars with said burgers? Finally getting round to scanning my 80s and 90s medium format negs. This place, Smokey’s burgers was across the road from Ellingtons, sort of, where now beret wearing fifth flatters trade snarl with curled lip. Was a pasta place before, equally money losing. After decades a new building finally going up on the site. Stirling Street/Beaufort Street. Apart from Smokey’s, amazing how little Stirling Street has changed over the decades. I don’t know when I took this. Guessing 1986.

Perth says “worst” in so many ways…

The Lazy Aussie — Sun, 01 May 2011 16:01:34 +0000

Seen by Anne F. Golden Circle 1976. Scandinavian? That would be Miss Mauds then. How depressing that Perth tourism marketing hasn’t advanced at all in the last 35 years. The same mistake of featuring stuff that people can get better and more conveniently closer to home is made virtually every time WA is promoted. Don’t try and convince Americans to fly 18 hours to go to the beach, when they have the option of Tahiti, Hawaii, Malaysia &c a fraction of the time away. We do have all those French restaurants though. That sector has really grown.

Perfect Secretary

The Lazy Aussie — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 16:01:25 +0000

A worst by Natalia Fan#1. 1979. Updated 1988. Cover model is a Grljusich.

Weekend Worstoff 129

The Lazy Aussie — Sat, 16 Oct 2010 00:10:09 +0000

Tristan H saw that the downward spiral of Dunsborough is being made even more exquisite. “Le” boatshed? Jeezus. I wonder what Brendon would think? This is not connected to my Le Specs wearing.People have sent me this Morley wall before. Ninja wants a truck to run through it. It’s not without charm though. Outrage Cohen remembers the battery man who used to ply plates of batteries on William Street. Now probably occupied by a shop selling ironic objects to hipsters. And Glenn is confused by Am Confused website. I’m not surprised. I am a little confused by their “wacky” graphic design.

And Charlesjhey, now in London, sent this Melbourne shot taken by a friend.

Worst well.

Graeme Turner Puzzle Ring – Come Ride The Peace Beard

The Lazy Aussie — Mon, 26 Apr 2010 16:01:27 +0000

Oh peace beard sounding louder
Glide on my peace beard
Come on now peace beard
Yes, peace beard holy roller

Everyone jump on my peace beard
Come on now peace beard… Cat Stevens, Peace Beard

I have been chasing this Perth Worst for a very long time. In about 1982 I had Graeme Turner as a Language & Culture tutor, where his most memorable words to us largely gormless first years were, “I’m not trying to convert you to Communism – not that it would do you any harm…” He is now to be found at the University of Queensland, and from time to time on Radio National, if the topic were to be say, “Kylie Minogue, a new paradigm, or hegemony in hotpants?” or “Ray Martin, post Grampsciist or complete cunt?”. I remember that Graeme’s folk album Puzzle Ring once littered the bargain bins, in the early 1980s, but was unable to find a copy until today. In fact it’s almost impossible to even find a mention of it.

Could I really have forgotten he had carved his beard and mo into a fucking peace symbol! How could I have forgotten that?! How could a peace beard have faded so quickly from the scene? Even Doug Parkinson wouldn’t have had the kahunas for that. I’m thinking that beard must have seen a lot of action. Who could resist “Not only do I have an album out baby, but cop the beard. Riding this beard just once is worth fifty freedom marches.”

I’m half tempted to plait my pubes into the first few verses of “War, what is it good for?” And the back cover? Shouldn’t the left one hang lower?

Ride on the peace beard

My peace beard Holly Roller