I sincerely think the residents of Margaret River are unaware that the town is an ugly craphole not a Tuscan village. Buying a place in Margs immediately brings on a kind of mental blindness. Where the rest of the world sees unwashed drunk bogans walking the streets, Margs residents see forest nymphs distributing pixie dust. Where visitors see a Target flanno sale, MR residents see a baguette and truffle popup next to an orangerie. Margaret River, get over yourselves. Your town is not beautiful. Your town is not interesting. Your town cannot be ruined – it was ruined decades ago. Take the example of the opposition to Woolworths possibly allowing a “fast food restaurant” in their new premises. How self unaware can you get?
“Katrina Lombardo has joined a chorus of locals who pleaded with Woolworths through its Facebook page this week to withdraw a 121-seat fast food outlet from its new Margaret River development. She asked the company to withdraw its application in the name of public health and referred to obesity, diabetes, heart disease and cancer becoming more prevalent due to “fat and sugar-filled fake food that is also filled with preservatives galore”.
OK first, as noted, 60 Chicken Threats 20 Red Roosters and a 30 storey McDonalds wouldn’t fuck up the town. It’s already a hole. Secondly, surely someone has given Katrina a bit of a slapdown, noting the town is most famous for preservative filled, obesity, heart disease, diabetes and cancer causing drug of human misery – alcohol. Is there a website Grumpy Hypocrites standing in front of buildings?
Here it is now. More power to it.
Although I do agree that ingredients such as snouts and sawdust should be sourced locally.
I’m touched by her concern about support for the major fast food retailer. However, you can tell people are taking joy in throwing foreign snouts and sawdust in the rubbish.
did she knit that cardigan herself from the collected freerange underarm hair of feral Cowaramup wimmin?
and that necklace? surely the shrivelled testes of emasculated househusbands.
no ‘grumpy hypocrites’, but there is this:
http://glumcouncillors.tumblr.com/
Expect a visit from the suede-denim Secret Police.
John Butler sells out.
Thats not a critique, just no door sales at the Fly By Night
a typical resident who supports local food producers:
http://www.margaretrivermail.com.au/story/535059/indecent-act-committed-by-naked-margaret-river-man/?cs=1429
Little known fact – most of the really delightful Tuscan and Provencal architecture is now being done in tilt-up concrete.
It could be worse: they could be getting a SECOND DRIVE-THRU at their McDonalds…
Now that rattles my ornaments. I was just about to opine that even the smell of Macca’s couldn’t make it any worse when I realised it wasn’t Derby in the Kimberley.
“You can smell all the smells from the restaurant inside and outside our bungalow.”
My favourite conspiracy theory is that they have a scented hot oil mister in the main outlet. You couldn’t get that smell that far from the epicentre if you weren’t working at it. Of course this presupposes that some people actually think a McDonald’s smells *good*, but given that some people like the look of films on their TV with the smooth motion setting turned ‘on’, anything is possible.
OMG indeed.A well timed and heartfelt missive,LA. Ms Lombardi does deserve a slapdown and a good kick up the arse to boot. Nothing speaks bespoke-ness than Margaret River except perhaps Freo on a good day. Acting Director of Sustainable Development, Mr Iliya Hastings, replying to questions from Ms Sabine Lane at the SHIRE OF AUGUSTA-MARGARET RIVER
ORDINARY COUNCIL MEETING on the 10 October 2012 stated that factors in the council’s consideration in the approval of the food court include
1. Decreasing Margaret River’s reputation as a Regional Food destination
2. The impact upon the Brand Margaret River
Consideration of these two factors defeated the coal mining industry.Bring on the carcinogens of celebration.
I personally am hoping for significant advances in DNA repair technology. Either that or robot beeanisation.
Ironic given Margs was ground zero for River rooster (vale), which then spread it’s chicheny goodness throughout the southwest. Fattening gen x’s with over mayo’ed chicken rolls and greasy pineapple fritters
a fast food outlet that doesn’t support local producers, as opposed to a national supermarket that does? whilst also supporting the right of every australian to gamble away the family assets.
margaret river – wa’s finest shit hole.
Now pokies might improve Margs.
why do people persist in thinking it’s a charming south-west town?
the hours we have spent dissuading visitors from heading down there.
Margaret river’s only redeeming feature is that it’s sorta close to places external to it that you might want to see. All offset by the ridiculous price you pay for accommodation
In that way it’s sorta like Bunbury, just with more hippies
and less charm.
Even the hippies are a bit of a delusion. You need to head closer to Dennmark.
I don’t think its big enough. It should be huge so Margaret River can be like other country towns with big apples, rams, lobsters etc. Seems a pity really for them to miss out on such a golden opportunity to hold their heads high and mix it with the best rural landmarks around the country. Shame on them I say.
They should put their hands up for a Big W, that’ll get them on the map
I hear such things play havoc with traffic patterns.
“Big” W is not usually so big. About the lobby area of the average Walmart store…
Margaret River as a body of water, as a concept – yes. As an actual destination – no. The trouble with ‘destinations’ is the support infrastructure has to go somewhere. It has been royally fucked up here.
I happened to visit Lynchburg, Tennessee since I was in the area. The actual destination is all quaint & village like as advertised. Nearby are two modern cities where the support infrastructure can be as modern as, well, not very modern but you get the idea, pimply shoppies have somewhere else to go and add colour and vibrancy.
Bunch of whingers. Mammoth cave is awesome. Leeuwin Estate Chardonnay (Art Series) is all sorts of buttery goodness. The deli section of the IGA is pretty good.
Mammoth Cave is not in town. There are lots of nice places near but the town is not.
Morries is sensational for dinner.
The previous version went bust.
Capitalism! Can’t live with it, can’t live without it…
all the fashionable people have moved on to Augusta.
Margaret River is so last century.
Just as long as they don’t fuck up the colour patch.
Tried to sell it for about a decade.
Best place ever really, I rely on it not to change
whingers on the worst of perth?
oh noes!
whatever next?
if they had told me two years ago that the Perth Arena was being built specifically so that INXS could play their last ever concert there, I wouldn’t have begrudged them the money, or the ugliness. I may even have contributed some loose change.
I hope this paves the way toward the Perth Arena being an elephant’s graveyard where music acts that have outlived their welcome can come to die. Maybe some sort of enforced euthenasia.
Elton John, Nickelback and Andre Rieu:- your Kool-Aid awaits you.
I knew INXS were old, but also gay? 2016 first scheduled staraight performer for perth Stadium Savage Garden reform.
i thoroughly enjoyed the elton kool aid. he’s far from past it.
I’m sorry, but I simply don’t believe you.
so sorry to disappoint you.
Well someone is claiming Helen Hunt was not crap in a movie, so I guess it’s possible.
I see that Kiss are going to play the Arena
should we rename it the DinoDrome?
Kiss are old gays? Wait, Paul Stanley totally rocked men that look like old lesbians.
Perth Arena is the Merimbula Bowling Club for stadium rock.
I’ve always been surprised at the way a popular tourist town centred around premium wines contains only 3 pubs, all of them ranging between discusting and mediocre. Bussell Highway is no Arrondissement.
I made a point of purchasing wines from the Barossa.
he
I just Google-mapped Margaret River.
It’s no Kinderhook but still several steps up from Pleasant Valley (last pleasant circa 1912).
On the coast, about 10 minutes drive away monster waves crush surfers. Nearby to the town are some nices places. That’s its problem. Other quaint towns turn crapholes are on the coast, so you can turn your head to a beautiful view. Margs is just out of sight, so as it gets worse, there’s nothing else.
MR was last nice in the 70s
The outskirts look beautiful but the main strip looks so pre-fab. But at least Margaret River is coherent and looks walkable, which is more than anyone can say for Pleasant Valley (which, while itself much less ugly than certain notable hellholes in the HRV, is depressing for preserving just enough of its bucolic past to make its current post-fire present that much more soul-killing by contrast).
I think Rob Broadfield mentioned he ate some kind of animal from the HRV in a review in the Weekend West on Saturday. No description on who was serving the drinks as far as i remember.
http://apiln.blogspot.com/2010_06_01_archive.html?m=1
Now we know what G.S.T is for!
Is everyone in the upper middle class a smug fuckhead or is it just you?
Pretty much everyone. You get used to it.
To whom is that derogatory comment addressed? Eh??
It appears to be no more than the utterance of an inverted snob of the bogan kind.
pre·ten·tious
/priˈtenCHəs/
Adjective
Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed.
Oh dear, the dictionary definition comes out.
Looser.
I have never been able to understand why this “too good for Perth” crowd of failed journos and the like doen’t just go the whole hog and piss off to melbourne.
You could all start a cheap-plonk-with-a-rich-sounding-name commune in Brunswick and be, like, way cultural.
There’s too many different anonymouses.
Blame blogspot and the gravitar monster.
Anonymice?
Sauvignon Dell?
No one drinks sauvignon any more. I’m moving to Reisling Heights, or maybe Gewürztraminer Vista.
You know you’re old when when reisling is in after being out for ages and, before that, being in.
Fuck me drunk (but not on gewurztraminer).
Chardonnay and Cold Duck will be back again soon.
Methanol Springs
i think you’ll find that is in bali.
Howling Wolves Valley?
Passion pop palace
Haha, nice. Love a good blow-in meltdown.
I bet you love getting blown in.
Touche anonymous
Sorry Mance, I don’t let fags touchè me.
Nor me.
I quit over 30 years ago.
Pingback: In the heat of the bong | The Worst of Perth