A worst by James N. Bayswater.
I don’t get it. 
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Worst Talk
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A friend of mine used to tell folks from the US in chatrooms to look out for drop bears if they come to Australia; that they drop out of trees, attacking from above. This same person also used to tell them the buy fine grit sand paper and sand their CDs or they wouldn’t play in our backwards CD players.
a dab of vegemite (fadgemite) behind the ears wards off drop bears
The gullible people my friend used to chat to would have believed that orbea!
Bit OT – my other half apparently had his mouth washed out with soap for asking for toast with vaginamite at around age 10. He then got it again asking for penis butter on his sandwiches. You’d think he’d have learned the first time. He didn’t appreciate me laughing at the story when he told me.
At school camps we used to tell younger kids there were drop bears in the bush, and you have to smear vegemite on the back of your neck to repel them. I don’t think it ever worked.
Far be it for me to question editorial decisions, but gee, I don’t know. So many fine worsts slipping from posterity, sniff.
You don’t like this? I thought it was enigmatic and stupid, the perfect mix.
Just as my house is heating up, I’m warming to it. Fuck this weather. I guess I know what it is to be a “sweater” now.
I’ve sent better… recently too.
What about SPCS?
Was that better? I don’t know.
You’re right. Not better.
Worster.
‘Enigmatic and stupid’ and swear words.
So you’re saying the ‘Worstness’ is not in the object itself, but in the execution? In that some knob thought it would be a funny idea, and actually followed through (heh) by purchasing a drop
bearhorse, and making a sign, and then affixing same to a street tree.I can dig it.
No the whole lot, concept,to implementation.
Maybe the Derridarian could help here. Or not.
Fair enough.
Come to think of it, wouldn’t a stuffed toy bear have been much easier to get hold of? So why the horse? Wired.
Perpetrator was so stoned that either didn’t notice or didn’t care – just grabbed the first thing to hand. Or maybe for extra comic effect – note otherwise superfluous scare quotes re “drop bear.”
But why? Who is this text constructed for? Is it didactic in nature?
More rhetorical I’d say.
And I thought I was highbrow for not making a Sarah Jessica Parker joke.
SJP or Richard III, it’s all the same in this crazy po-mo world.
@ NF#1
I rather think that the horse is the one that looks slightly wasted…just needs someone with a red pen to ink some bloodshot eye effect.
Then you can blame the sign on the crazy horse who thought itself a bear, and a dropbear at that, trying to win a part as some non sequitur in a Cheech & Chong movie.
Or a Patti Chong movie…then it’d make perfect sense.
I thought he looked a tad gaint, BO’T, what with being a horse and all.
Wired and gaint indeed, being hung like a horse hung like horse.
Here’s why, Pete.
Why couldn’t the tree speak?
because it was a little horse.
….or because it forgot the tail?
Why didnt this James N post a picture?
yeah yeah, we all get it. youve been trolling. i fell for it. well done you.
That bear is Gaint and Wired. What more do you want ?
im not and what does that even mean?