Like the Emperor’s new clothes??

Some one deserves to catch cold at the Worst.

One can’t help feel that if someone was to run a worst story of the year contest for the Worst, this one would win hands down. It was so childish – what the hell was it doing on the opinion pages?

(Stoopid bastard – he should have stuck with his stories on Esperance port or rants about how Obama is still all talk – ed).

But wait a minute – I just had a scary thought. Could it be that we are the ones missing the point here? Is there something we don’t understand about modern journalism which goes over our heads everytime PM sits at his keyboard and farts one out? Maybe this story was an act of genius and we are just too stupid to realise it?

It’s a sad state of affairs when self doubt sets in, but I think we will be asking ourselves these questions when a new editor is appointed, but the paper continues to print Murryesque shite.

maybe I will apply

hopefully Nurry’s Martian Cow Flatulence piece has ruled him out

Dear All,

Bob Cronin has urged staff who believe they are up to the task to apply for the vacant editor’s position.

I also encourage our people to apply for the job if they think they have got what it takes.

We have engaged some outside help to assist in the recruitment and selection process.

If you want to throw your hat in the ring, in the first instance please send your CV to Company Secretary, Peter Bryant, as soon as possible.

Regards,

Chris Wharton

Chief Executive Officer

West Australian Newspapers Limited

That could become “quote of the month” or maybe even decade.

Justifiably we bag the Worst, it’s editor and a variety of other contributors to this pathetic rag, but what of the punters who purchase the thing?

Surely there’s an academic thesis that needs to be written on the ovine behaviour of the masses who keep this parody of a newspaper in business.

The news on Mars wasn’t good.

At first blush, looking at Mars is like a first blush as it’s red. This doesn’t mean it’s communist, although we did have commie cows in Russia when Stalin was in charge. I seemed to recall I wrote an editorial back in 1972 when just a wee whippersnapper out of geo school about the red menace. Today it’s a green one (ha, ha).

Ah, geo school and the time we looked for that red metal, copper. One of my classmates was a David Bowie fan and he kept listening to that song Life on Mars. Later there was Simply Red.

Now getting back to the news on Mars. It’s not good? Why? Fucked if I know. Indeed, I’m really not sure if I have a point at all today – come to think of it, I’m running out of whaffle.

Maybe I can write about writers’ block. Haven’t done that one for a while. There’s a lot to say about Esperance port, but 12 articles in a week is perhaps a bit much – even for the idiotic readers who buy this rag.

Jeeez – there must be a way I can write another tirade about that hypocrite Rudd and his broken ETS promise.

I know. I’ll be satirical, just like the time I pretended to be Idi Amin after Condi’s visit. Oh what a laugh – still, more observant readers would have noticed my sensitivity when I failed to mention her black tits or raise the possibilty that she may be a lezbo. No, no – making slurs against both race and gender is below me.

Anyway, must think, need wordcount – back to Rudd.

I know – I can do a piece that mentions Mars, cows and farts. Yes, that will be funny. Here we go:

The news on Mars wasn’t good….