The Worst of Perth

Posted in worst advertising | Tagged worst advertising, avanti, avanti cakes, james dean, marilyn monroe | 28 Comments

28 Responses to “Avanti”

1. on May 13, 2008 at 8:46 am1 David Cohen

   Perhaps Jimmy’s missing limb was the result of a really good Bombe Alaska?
   Bwa-haha-ha-ha-har! I thank you, I’m here all week.

   
   
2. on May 13, 2008 at 9:27 am2 Rolly

   Maybe it’s a spiritualist’s painting.
   You know, claiming to be made from visions-in-trance after the subjects’ death.
   James just hadn’t got around to re-attaching the spiritual remains of his arm at the time.
   Been too busy with Marilyn perhaps.

   
   
3. on May 13, 2008 at 9:56 am3 Russell

   Not TWOP - Marilyn’s smile would cheer anyone up (and there’s an idea for Alannah there too). Signs like that, when not visually offensive, are handy when giving directions.

   
   
4. on May 13, 2008 at 9:56 am4 Bento

   That sign always reminds me of those street artists that draw pictures of tourists, which end up looking a bit like the subject, yet somehow, not.

   To their credit, there are numerous opportunities for incorrect apostrophe deployment, which have been admirably resisted.

   Champagne comedy, Mr. Cohen.

   
   
5. on May 13, 2008 at 10:06 am5 The Lazy Aussie

   Yes Bento, it’s the almost but not quite that attracted me and others to this one. Not bad enough to be really bad and yet satisfyingly just missing the mark.
   David, you forgot to ad “[tap, tap] Is this thing working?”

   
   
6. on May 13, 2008 at 10:25 am6 David Cohen

   Only you make the jokes LA?

   
   
7. on May 13, 2008 at 10:26 am7 Levon

   The look on James Dean’s face suggests he’s having second thoughts about the marriage; that maybe she’ll just leave him for some loser writer.

   
   
8. on May 13, 2008 at 10:39 am8 The Lazy Aussie

   The lazy Aussie is going to be Live at The Charles in a few weeks.

   
   
9. on May 13, 2008 at 10:42 am9 Bill O'Slatter

   Now that the Rudd government has made it legal this is O,K, i.e getting married to a trannie made to look like Marilyn.

   
   
10. on May 13, 2008 at 10:56 am10 David Cohen

    Good news about the Charles. Your fans will attend. As long as it doesn’t interfere with TWOP blogging.

    
    
11. on May 13, 2008 at 10:58 am11 Ljuke

    Was that the exact wording of the legislation? “Getting married to a trannie made to look like Marilyn”.

    
    
12. on May 13, 2008 at 11:00 am12 skink

    it’s another one of those artists: “I don’t do hands or feet”

    where are her hands? rummaging in the cake for something?

    if you intended painting a mural - wouldn’t you render the wall, or at least block up the airbricks? - it looks like Jimmy Dean is eating a waffle

    
    
13. on May 13, 2008 at 11:04 am13 The Lazy Aussie

    I’d better do an ad. It won’t just be normal stand-up. Will be comedy debate for world environment day or some such crap.

    
    
14. on May 13, 2008 at 11:36 am14 scott

    agreed. I see this every week on my way up to the always hectic and always ’sold out’ coles in Morley…. wanna talk about a food crisis, try shopping for food in Perth…..

    
    
15. on May 13, 2008 at 11:58 am15 Bento

    LA - regret I will be overseas for several weeks, and will be unable to attend the “comedy debate for world environment day or some such crap”. It sounds like a truly worthy cause.

    Most of all, I would be very upset if I missed the Hoey heckling experience…

    
    
16. on May 13, 2008 at 12:04 pm16 The Lazy Aussie

    Very convenient Bento. VERY convenient. i haven’t even said the date yet.

    
    
17. on May 13, 2008 at 1:01 pm17 CK

    [it’s another one of those artists: “I don’t do hands or feet”

    where are her hands? rummaging in the cake for something?]

    I think she may be pleasuring herself.

    
    
18. on May 13, 2008 at 1:06 pm18 The Lazy Aussie

    I think she may have a knife. This not exposed very well.

    
    
19. on May 13, 2008 at 1:37 pm19 Bill O'Slatter

    If Grogg Hoggy isn’t at the comedy event , LA you could Hoggy impersonations to entertain the TWOPPERS. It can’t be that hard given his little world : teapot art , porno ,grog, Gail Robinson and the YWL.(Young Women’s League)

    
    
20. on May 13, 2008 at 3:29 pm20 The Lazy Aussie

    I’m usually far too funny for people to think of heckling.

    
    
21. on May 13, 2008 at 3:32 pm21 Bill O'Slatter

    It can’t get any funnier than sausages and the scrutinator (S-meter ).

    
    
22. on May 13, 2008 at 5:46 pm22 David Cohen

    Hmmm. Is the Charles really the best venue for you, LA?

    As your media advisor I strongly advise doing your shtick at one of the establishments you have covered on TWOP: the Norwood, or the Red Castle.

    Perhaps even the Hyatt, if you can bear it?

    Invite Paul Murray to the VIP/corporate box area and acres of coverage is guaranteed.

    
    
23. on May 13, 2008 at 6:20 pm23 Bento

    Surely the Ling is the ideal venue?

    
    
24. on May 13, 2008 at 7:45 pm24 David Cohen

    Yes Bento. He’s been to NZ, after all. Perhaps he could warm up the skumpies for Dennis Marsh?

    
    
25. on May 13, 2008 at 8:08 pm25 The Lazy Aussie

    The Leopold is as low as I have been performance wise. No wait, I tell a lie. Wanneroo Tavern.

    
    
26. on May 13, 2008 at 8:21 pm26 Bento

    Blimey. I would’ve thought even Max Kaye’s patented brand of ‘comedy’ would be too sophisticated for the fair residents of Wanneroo. What did your act consist of, blonde jokes?

    
    
27. on May 13, 2008 at 8:55 pm27 The Lazy Aussie

    Funny you should say that. Was a Nobby’s nuts promotion which included a joke competition. I was MC. Two blondes in bikinis gave out free nuts while the local denizens - to a man - did poofter jokes. Long long time ago, but I remember the beginnings to all the jokes. “There were two poofters right…”

    
    
28. on May 13, 2008 at 9:42 pm28 Frank Calabrese

    [Funny you should say that. Was a Nobby’s nuts promotion which included a joke competition. I was MC. Two blondes in bikinis gave out free nuts while the local denizens - to a man - did poofter jokes. Long long time ago, but I remember the beginnings to all the jokes. “There were two poofters right…”]

    But were there any sons of Italian market Gardeners in the audience dressed in their latin finest and wearing enough Bling to adorn a Madonna to be branded “Poofters” though ?

    
    

Leave a Reply

Name (required)

Mail (will not be published) (required)

Website